hey! i just read unwanted and oooh boy i’m crying. i can relate so much to harry, tbh. i feel so alone and unwanted all my life and it’s so hard to open up to people and be vulnerable bc ppl leave all the time, and a lot of trauma. and specially with the pandemic now, i lost contact with so many friends. and it feels like you’re not enough. anyway, i wanted to thank u for your amazing words and ask u what inspired u to write that story? it felt so real and it made me want to get to know you a little bit more (if that’s ok). i never cried so much reading a fic of yours and thank u for making me feel understood somehow through your words. i love your draco, what he said to harry was basically therapy lolol have a great week xx
Ahhhh, thank you so much!!! This is so lovely.
I think that the beauty of fiction is seeing ourselves in other people's words and knowing, therefore, that we aren't actually alone. I'm so glad my words could do this a bit for you.
I was inspired to write (Un)wanted because of a "what if! Harry and Ginny got pregnant by accident!" and an immediate long discussion with friends about how hard Harry would find that. And once that idea got its hooks in my head, I couldn't shake it.
When I look at the themes that I always seem to write, it's often about family and identity. (Is all fiction always about family and identity?) There's something primary to me in Harry's character about his trauma from being orphaned, from being abused and mistreated by his guardians, from his experience in the war. I think this would affect his parenting no matter what he did in adulthood—whether that's becoming a parent, choosing to not have kids, or going through an abortion. Harry's childhood issues around belonging are so strong and he has so much to work through, so much he wants to do better for a future generation.
I think Harry would struggle to leave a kid at daycare if they were crying. I think he would want to cuddle a baby and not put them down (I just wrote this in When Times are Dire!) I think Harry would be devastated if he were to find out he had a biological child he never knew about (I wrote this in when by now and tree by leaf!) I think he'd do whatever he could to make sure Teddy grew up feeling wanted (I wrote this in Calamity's Child and Lost in my Own Home!)
I think this is just one of the fundamental pieces of Harry for me, and I also think that the inner growth that happens to characters when they're exploring family dynamics and identity is one of the things that fascinates me most about fictional narratives. (And really, about human life.)
Thanks so much for your kind words and I'm so glad you found something touching in my words! 💜
