#*chrisef2f

[sebsxstans-blog]

it takes two dads (and a mom) to be this cute | chris & seb

@chrisnotcap-evans

Tulsa had been fun, Sebastian wasn't even pretending it hadn't been. But being back in Royal and picking up his son, even if a little sleepy and grumpy, was the definite highlight of the weekend. Closely followed by knowing Chris would be coming by in a few. "He's probably gonna be a blubbering idiot about it," Sebastian told his son, biting the baby's foot softly while snapping the straps of the fresh diaper closed. And now for the master piece. Something that had been on Sebastian's mind for a while (too long, probably), and that he needed to put out there in a way Chris would hopefully finally understand. And maybe also as an apology. Sebastian knew he had been not at his best since Chris had left the hospital, stuck somewhere between snappy and clingy. But the double-whammy of thinking for nearly a week that he had lost Chris emotionally only to be followed up by thinking Chris had managed to kill himself? Fuck it, he had needed some time to come to terms with that. So he had hovered and hadn't laughed at jokes and Chris just had to deal with it. Tonight, thought, tonight he wanted to be done with that. It had been long enough and god, he knew he needed to let it go. So, the future was on the menu for the evening, starting with Zander as his best asset (though that was universally true, not just for the night). "Hey," Sebastian beamed at Chris when he opened the door, greeting his guy with a long but gentle kiss. "Go hit up the sofa, I just need a second." And it really was only a second, Zander all bundled up in the onesie specifically for the day and freshly changed and fed, in the crib in his room at Sebastian's place for the very first time which was a thrill in and off itself. Still, he carried Zander right back out, hovering a moment on the stairs just happy. He wasn't sure why Tulsa had given him this kind of serene feeling, but he couldn't help it and really, why should he. "Here, pretty sure he missed you nearly as much as I did," Sebastian smiled when placing Zander in Chris' arms, a mix of scared excitement racing over his body. He didn't even bother with sitting on the couch himself, instead kneeling on the floor, close to his two favorite guys. “I’m sorry for the last two weeks. Honestly, over it now, too. And I just ... family time tonight, yeah? You need to know, Chris, this is what I see when I look at him, ok? No doubt about it.”

[sebsxstans-blog]

With a small but excited grin, Sebastian stepped up behind Chris’ back (he knew that back, had spend time memorizing every inch of it) and whispered in his ear. “Well, fancy meeting you here.”

@chrisnotcap-evans

[sebsxstans-blog]

one sock and a lot of feeling | Chris & Seb

@chrisnotcap-evans

He hadn’t slept - really slept - in roughly three days and he knew it showed. He had been a little bit of a good guy when Zan had drifted off twenty minutes ago and signed a bunch of things for the fans at the convention he was missing this weekend and then he had dragged himself into the shower. He hadn’t even realized he smelled like asswipes, powder and milky spit until he’d washed it off. Candice was off with her mother for a few hours, a well deserved break and Sebastian was smacking life into his cheeks when he heard Zan become fussy again. “No, no, no, no, no,” he muttered, hopping on one foot toward the crib while trying to put on fresh socks. “Come on, buddy. Just ... just give me an hour, okay? Chris is coming by and I just need ... just give me an hour. And we like Chris, yeah? Remember? Tall, blonde, gorgeous?” His son really needed to get his shit together, if only so they could double-team Chris and convince him to ... 

“Hey,” Seb hoped he looked as happy as he felt when he opened the door to Chris, Zan on his still naked chest and only wearing boxers and one sock.  He felt a slight blush creeping on his cheeks.  “Please pretend I don’t look like I’m losing it.” 

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waiting, waiting, waiting |Chris & Seb

@chrisnotcap-evans

He was sitting, or pretending to. Every thirty seconds, he was on his feet again, pacing, before sitting back down and the whole thing started all over again. There was still time to go, the nurse had said. All kinds of relaxed and reassuring and not. at. all. helping. Because this was it. This was where there was no fucking way back and Candice was in pain (or not, it came and went. Labor man, fucking freaky) and Sebastian had to be calm and helpful and strong while trying to hide how he was literally shaking out of his skin. Chris had said he would come, and Seb believed him but ... “Keep it together, Stan,” He wasn’t in the habit of talking to himself a lot. Today seemed like an excellent day for an exception to the rule. “You got the easy end of the stick, you need to not be a loser right now.”  But he was stuck in his head now and getting out was becoming more and more difficult.

~*~

He was back to stumbling, shouldering his way out of the delivery room with his hair a mess, hands freshly washed and still pretty much high as hell on ... life. His eyes were a little bit frantic, half his focus straining back into the room behind him, waiting to hear another whimper from his son. The nurse had brought him back not long ago, swaddled up in a blanked and currently thoroughly enjoying his very first meal. The first time Sebastian had felt like he was able to tear himself away from Can and his son, he had made his way out. To find ... “Chris,” whoa, his voice sounded rough, but he was smiling, fucking beaming, even though he still felt shaky as hell. “It’s ... he ... it’s a boy. Chris I got a son.” 

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never gonna go (away) | chris & seb

@chrisnotcap-evans

By the time he knocked on Chris’ door, he felt jittery again. No matter how mildly confident he’d felt after leaving Candice’s place, now he was second guessing himself again. And mainly mentally smacking himself for overthinking things. And so he didn’t even get back into the mental debate over what their night a week could have meant, he just slouched against the doorway, hands in his pants pockets and practiced easy grin on his face. Which ... pretty much slipped off his lips the second Chris opened the door. Instead, he felt like someone punched him to the stomach, heart making a mad dash for his throat and mouth dry. 

“Uhm, hey,” Where was the easy smile? The plans and convictions that he’d had in mind coming here? No, instead his eyes were dropping to Chris’ lips, warmth flooding him remembering the hours he’d spend exploring them. Look away, you fucking idiot! He told himself, practically ripping his gaze away and focusing on a picture frame somewhere behind Chris. “Kinda missed ya this week,” It still slipped out, and he should probably just give up, lay on the ground like Dodger and admit defeat. He slowly looked back to Chris, color on his cheeks and a careful smile, nearly apologetic, curving his mouth upward, finally. “I’ll ... uh ... I’ll just walk ... inside.”

[sebsxstans-blog]

lance tucker is nothing compared to this | chris & seb

He forced himself not to read more into it. Read anything into anything, really. Something had drastically changed - or had it? - and maybe they would talk about it, maybe they would just play a few rounds of Mario Kart and toast to his birthday with a beer. Sebastian was cool. He was so fucking cool, Lance Tucker was hot, he was - he jumped about a foot when he heard a knock on the door. Once, twice he ran his hand through his hair and then ...

“Hey, hello. Uhm, thanks,” Cool. as a. Cucumber. “Awesome that you came over.”

@chrisnotcap-evans

[sebsxstans-blog]

mission control - spacebean is approaching | Chris & Seb

Saturday, Aug. 6th, Sebastian’s home | @chrisnotcap-evans

Today was a groan day. It had started the moment Sebastian had opened his eyes, squinting into the way too bright sunlight and continued that way, mainly in pain (though that groan once he stepped into the shower definitely had been all relieve). But he had things to do today, exciting things that made crawling out of bed a tiny bit more bearable. Today was nursery day, the day where he would actually … do something about the impending change in his life. Coffee in hand (Aspirin and two glasses of water downed already), Seb pattered along, naked feet shuffling over hardwood floors until he reached the room that for the longest time should have become a second bedroom-slash-office, a few boxes still left unpacked gathered dust there now, but other than that it was only an empty room. Seb sipped his coffee, cursing because he sipped it too hot (like always). Apparently his son or daughter would grow up in this room. He waited for the familiar wave of panic, the one he usually had to weather before the more soothing, positive emotions came through but today there was … an echo. An ache or fear somewhere ways back and his lips quirked up into a smile while he stirred his hot beverage - so last night hadn’t been a fluke? He had actually … come to accept it? Even hungover like hell, he remembered his excitement at seeing Candice, drunken dancing and his focus … well, not really on her. Was that a bad thing? Probably not. They were not … anything, were they? Seb wished he knew, but recently hardly anything actually seemed to connect with him other than his impending fatherhood or his work. The one swallowed him whole, the other was good for losing himself in something else and there wasn’t much room left in between. Blake had had to learn that the hard way. Shit, he definitely needed to like … apologize again. Bring her flowers or something. But first – nursery.

[Text: Snuffles] Bring your best space outfit Ab-Attack, I got beer for ya and let’s kick nursery ass. [Text: Snuffles] idk do people kick nursery asses? [Text: Snuffles] PS: sry bout last night. You’re the fucking best.

He’d send Chris the picture he’d found days ago. Had had an embarrassingly in-depth conversation with a bear of a woman at a hardware store, bought paint and utensils and printed off every constellation he could think of. He was ready for this. And that Chris was so fucking willing to help … well that was something else altogether. Seb had been wondering, recently, if something had changed. Not that they were suddenly close – they’d always been that, easily fueled by Chris’ nature and the mild, thrumming undercurrent of Seb’s unrequited crush. Which, honestly, had no bearing in anything, but maybe it explained how they stuck like glue lately, he didn’t know. All he knew was that, when he opened the door for his friend that afternoon, he felt less like run over by a heard of Zebra’s, smiling was easy and damn, the man was fucking warm, it was great.

“So, you wanna do blue or the … what’s it called? Beige. You wanna do blue or beige?” Seb was glad in his rattiest sweats (and that said something) along with an old, white, threadbare t-shirt with a red wine stain on it that looked like Donald Duck if you squinted. He was still bare foot, actually bouncing a little as he led Chris into the room (now cleared of clutter). “And I mean … no idea ‘bout you, but I think a kid could be happy here … once it looks really cool.” He nodded, as if to underline his own words. “I’d thank you but I think one of these days you’re gonna clock me so …” He grinned at Chris, lightly punching his arm. “Beer?”

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morning blues coffee | Chris & Sebastian

Seb was on his feet, bouncing on the soles and opening his arms for a hug before Chris had even fully stepped through the door of the cafe. Even if the Civil War press madness hadn’t been that long ago, with everything going on right it had felt longer. A lot longer. Chris was still as gorgeous as always, and his smile meant Seb had to smile back, even if he didn’t feel like it in general. Damn, he’d missed his friend. “Hey man, thank you so much for coming.” 

@chrisnotcap-evans