#*vents*

[basmathgirl]

Tumblr woes when searching the #donna noble tag:

Thank god for @lookmomitsmytmblr's posts.

[vvitchgender]

I don’t wanna go back to school. :(

[vvitchgender]

TFW you discover your mother has for sure read Irreversible Damage and now you just have to live with the fact that she probably views you as a sad, broken, peer-pressured little lost lesbian and nothing you ever say or do will change her mind.

[vvitchgender]

I’m not going to get my BA until I’m 25. I have no idea whether I’ll end up in higher academia or making my way as some weird self-taught artist or a career I haven’t even considered yet. I’ve been homeless twice, not because of my own doing, but because sometimes forest fires happen and take everything away. I have two long-term partners who I can envision a life with, but where exactly we’ll live or how exactly it’ll all work out is anyone’s guess. My hobbies include sewing soda can tabs on my clothes and playing mobile phone RPGs. I so, so desperately want to be seen as a tough guy, but my first tattoo was a flower. On any given day I could be trying to parse which religious theory of the human soul aligns more with my experiences, or just debating whether I truly need to buy another knife. I want pet rats but right now all I have is a pet air plant. I can call myself a man in three different languages but it sticks in my throat when I try to say it to real people. My mother thinks I’m in a cult because I want to own my body and my name. I have a pipe shaped like a worm on a string. I think better with my hair braided. I like red wine, but it gives me migraines.

[vvitchgender]

Being a trans dude and having a mother who constantly laid claim to your body and its functions means you spend minutes at a time staring at a tattoo you got and feeling like it’s the only few square inches of skin that actually belong to you.

[vvitchgender]

Spent ten days with my mother. Almost went well. Almost handled it.

Then she came in at the end with “please stop the testosterone” and “are you going to cut your breasts off??” and “when your friends come to their senses and stop HRT please be kind to them”. I even gave it the old college try of offering to help her see my side but she wouldn’t do it. Stubbornly insisted that I’m not following the science.

I’m so tired. I’m so exhausted. I just want a mom who loves me and doesn’t think I’m killing myself. Who can see that I’m saving myself. I’m so fucking tired of everything. Thank fucking god I can go home now because I need as much distance between her and me as possible.

[vvitchgender]

I swear to god every woman in my life has a false idea of me they either worship or despise or both. I’m not your inspiration porn and I’m not your fucking stray lamb either I’m just me. I’m just me.