little christmas microfic/drabble of moonwater!! i'm warming up for longer stuff so any critics/comments are much appreciated!! also still learning tags so if theres stuff i should mention pre-fic lmk!!
cw for very mild angst/hurt-comfort, regulus having trauma from walburga and orion's a+ parenting
Hogwarts in the winter was serene. The morning before holiday, the grounds were covered in an unbroken sheet of white, the sun shimmered gently on the frozen lake, and Regulus Black was beyond cold.
He heaved his way up the stairs from the dungeons, his robes wrapped tighter than usual to try to maintain any body heat he had. In front of him, Barty prattled on about how he thought his holiday would go, while a half asleep Evan nodded along.
Breakfast was already being served, and the Great Hall was brimming with life. Regulus shivered as he slipped into his usual spot at the Slytherin table, immediately picking up the cup of hot chocolate resting on the table. He was always grateful for the house elves and the magic that had refreshments on the table without having to ask.
The trio chatted around, discussing end of term exams and how they thought they did and then the plans for next term. The final owl delivery came later than usual, the birds also seemingly ready for a long rest. Regulus' Great Horned Owl carried a small red envelope in his talons and dropped it into his lap with well practiced grace.
"Ohh, summons from Mother Dearest?" Teased Evan.
"Or perhaps a secret love letter from the boy you won't tell us about?" Barty tacked on, making a ridiculous expression to annoy his friend more.
Regulus shook his head and opened the envelope to a small note with no more than a sentance on it.
Our spot after breakfast?
-R.
He did his best to conceal his smile, peeking at the Gryffindor table.
Barty caught his glance up, and apparently never satisfied being an arse, nagged on. "It is him! Tell us your secrets Reggie, you cannot keep him away forever."
☽☆☾
With breakfast over and classes out for the term, Regulus' trip to the east wing of the castle was easy. The hard part was shaking his dorm mates, having to eventually strike a deal that they would be the first to know when he felt comfortable sharing who he had been meeting.
The black haired boy arrived first, the empty classroom becoming familiar to him after months of secret rendezvous'. The door opened again not more than two minutes later, and none other than Remus Lupin closed it behind him, a parcel in his hand.
"Reg, hi," He smiled, stepping close and opening his arms for an embrace. Regulus happily let himself be wrapped in the other's arms.
They stood quietly like that for what felt like ages, Remus resting his cheek on Regulus' head and rubbing circles into his back.
His emotions took him over all at once, as if his heart had thawed in the hug, and quietly began crying. It started slow at first, but bubbled into heaving sobs and a tight grip on Remus' jumper. When he began to calm and stepped back, Remus tilted his chin up to look him in the eyes.
"Whats wrong, starshine?" His gentle inquiry made Regulus choke out a sob again and it took him another minute to compose himself enough to respond.
"I don't- I *can't* go back, Rem. I can't do it anymore."
"You don't have to, you can come home with me. It might not be as glamorous as you hope but you'll be home."
"I want to, so badly, but I cannot deal with another howler. I can't promise she wouldn't track me down and hurt you or your parents-"
"We can worry about that later, love. I need you to be safe or my own safety will be the least of my concerns," Remus cut him off, squeezing one of his shoulders as a reassurance. "Just one holiday. I would fight the sun if it meant you never had to go back there."
Regulus sniffled, nodded, and wiped his face. He laughed nervously, "I feel so silly, you make it all sound so simple."
"Your'e not silly, I may not know what all you're going through, but I know I care about you. Everything about you is simple to me."
And Regulus finally felt seen, appreciated, cared for, protected. His chest felt warm and fuzzy, and he almost started crying again. "Thank you..."
"Always, Starshine," Remus went to hold Regulus face and was reminded of the present in his hand. "Oh, this is for you."
Regulus gently took the box from him, the tartan wrapping messy and torn on one side. It was charming, something that was truly only his. He looked up to Remus, searching for a hint of a joke in his eyes but only found a genuine fondness, so he began to pull back the paper.
Under the lid sat a mossy green jumper, one of Remus', one of Regulus' favorites.
"For me?" Remus nodded, taking the box so Regulus could pull out the garment. "I love it," and he started to cry again, clutching the jumper close to his chest.
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
The mantra repeated as a chorus in his mind, feeling so overwhelmed with emotion. Remus cared, and in such a way that only Regulus would know. He didn't have to share with his brother or have it taken from him because it 'wasn't proper.' Someone all of his own.
And Regulus decided that this would be the start of something new, something wholly for him. Remus wasn't a secret to keep, parents or brother be damned, he wanted to love Remus outside of this classroom.
heyy, bitty fic here again!! some of the dialogue came to me in a dream(/j) and i just. kinda needed to write it. again, critiques are always welcome!! (+ the song i was listening to when the dialogue hit me like a bus)
Regulus didn't know love. Not really, anyway. The closest thing he had ever had was Sirius and, well, he had found people he loved more in the Gryffindor Tower of all places, leaving his younger brother to rot alone.
So when Remus Lupin started spending quiet afternoons in the library with him, he thought it to be nothing more than one of Sirius' friends spying on him. That feeling slowly melted away when studying independently turned into questions about one another turned into catching the other staring, which of course led to the pair sitting at the top of one of the castle's many spires late at night.
The moon was half full, waxing, and the way its light shone onto Lupin had Regulus entranced. He knew he was staring and when he was caught, he quickly whipped his head away and looked down at his lap, hiding.
"You don't have to pretend you weren't looking," Lupin reasoned, inching his fingers to cover Regulus' own. The first ounce of contact made the younger boy flinch away. He pulled back and they sat in silence again.
A sudden guilt churned inside Regulus, his emotions warring.
"What do you want from me?" He asked abruptly, tired of mulling it over in his mind when he could stop being cowardly for once.
"What? Why would you think I want anything but your company?" Lupin looked baffled at the question.
"You're Sirius' friend. One of his best mates, even. One might think you were snogging if they didn't know any better."
"Oh, Regulus, I... I hadn't really thought of it that way." He hadn't? Then what way had he thought ?
"So you're here... of your own volition? Because you just wanted to see me?" Remus nodded slowly.
"Your brother is one of my best mates, yea, but he isn't you. You're quieter for sure, more attentive to littler things than he is. I love Sirius like he's my own brother sometimes but it's just... different with you." He explained, trailing off near the end when he realized what he'd said and, goodness, love? Regulus felt tight in his chest and he found himself patting his hand on the ground, searching for Remus' hand to grab and help regulate himself.
"I understand if this is a lot but I- You know I would never hurt you, right Reg? Not on purpose at least."
Regulus stared into his lap, his breath was rapid and shallow, he felt himself panicking but it wasn't the same as when he was panicking about his mother. It wasn't ugly or sour like the love he'd known in his childhood. It felt warm and gentle, especially when Remus gave his hand a small, reassuring squeeze.
"I.. I know, just. If you did, I wouldn't hate you. I couldn't hate you, especially not now, not even if you tried." And it was braver than he had ever been. Being this open was so unlike him, but he was trying because if Remus could be so honest then maybe he could, too.
