#-d3

[companionwolf]

Border collie pixy?? Much to think about

[companionwolf]

'Let's do our part as sheepdogs" US AND PIXY AS DOGGIES YES GOOD

[companionwolf]

OBJECTUMS GET BEHIND MY PLANE

^ me shooting all who are means to you

[companionwolf]

My tummy hurts ): Cycle coming... I think? I am worried about sleeping and I want to write little snippets about f/os but I'm too tired it's also too warm ):

[companionwolf]

If I put words and phrases on our aac app that are about specific things that maybe we experienced maybe not is that ...ok....I'm worried it will get us in trouble ): and not okay since we are not sure and if not sure is it wrong ? Lying?

I'm scared to do the adding of the words because it's stuff we are not allowed to think about but.. what if we need to say those words? Not that we would be allowed to even with mouth but... really scared it'll make big higher up parts angry and then they do things to me or other ones or make things move around ):

It's making me cry because I want to help us and we need words but I'm so scared of being in trouble for it and hurting me and the rest of the system. Especially since maybe it didn't happen to us in any way at all not even as a pseudomemory or other internal thing

All this since I accidentally saw symbols for related words and now brain will not leave it alone ): I feel like it's important to add the words but ...

(If it wasn't something this wouldn't be so painful to me would it?? Is it even real ... is my reaction real? I can't make it stop and I keep crying I'm so scared)

[companionwolf]

'You are allowed to talk about what happened to you'but what if you don't even know for sure if it happened.. ): what if you will never know and what if you get it wrong-- that it is something else or not even anything and then in that way you led everyone on and cried and cried and were scared and hurt for no reason or at least not for a reason that makes any actual sense at all ): I saw a thing that says it's ok to talk about it with therapist person and see if it was what happened but what if you're wrong and the therapist is wrong and it isn't even real and all the scary inside you is just false and all made up story ):

[companionwolf]

Daddy and uncle both don't know wherr the castle is so it's probably lost and I want to hope that maybe one of then find s it but I don't know if it will happen and I'm just really really sad

[companionwolf]

Beads and stuff are in.....the garage so when we finally get up please go get em and I'm not here please go get me