Apr 30
trying to work with each other is so genuinely frustrating. our host hasn't been fronting for a while, which is fine. but it'd be cool if he came back. and he's clearly not doing well, and he's spiraling, and none of the things i'm trying to do to help are helping. and all he does when i try to help him is insult me. i tell him i'm concerned as a friend and he says we aren't friends. he acts like we all hate him and we don't. there's just so much self loathing there and it's like trying to grab a hot object. i just can't. i wish i could do more. idk its late at night and im not explaining this well it just sucks.
