#-raine

[starlit-diaries]

Lowkey dunno what to do cause i really dont wanna use discord but I already pretty much fully set up a server and I made a stoat acct but it is so painfully slow which I get it cause like. suddenly having like a BUNCH new members but idk. Ill probably just on and off use stoat and be generally offline for a month and see if things change and stuff.

[thegays-andsteve]

killinf myself actually

[thegays-andsteve]

im bored chat

[thegays-andsteve]

we share an acc now 🎀 forget double trouble, this is whatever the trio version of that is

[devils-mini0n]

I want to make a sideblog just so I can tag posts as “Raine’s whispers”

[dinosaursindisarray]

We’re on a new medication for flashbacks and nightmares, but it also lowers blood pressure and what keeps happening is I’m not sure if I’m dissociating or if I’m getting dizzy/feeling odd because of low blood pressure. Or both. It could be both?

I don’t know because it’s hard to tell: low blood pressure can make it hard to concentrate like dissociation, and also dizziness, headache, nausea, poor balance, and blurred vision.

Which were usually key tells in dissociating before. Maxx needs glasses the most, so if he was around, headache and blurry vision were normal. Headaches are normal for any type of alter activity, tbh, with different types of headaches, and dizziness coming with it.

What’s been happening is a different type of dizziness/blurry vision/headache etc than normal, but it’s hard for me to tell. Like, I have all of Month’s memories and full contact with her, but some things seem to be lost, and sometimes memories aren’t good for knowing how something felt.

So it’s like factually knowing that dissociating causes these things, but not understanding the really subtle nuances of actually having experienced it before. I only really remember Month first-hand, even if I know of the others through her. Even being really close with Month and stuff, it’s like, wow it sure is hard being only a few weeks old.

Anyway, I hope this stuff calms down soon. We have a lot of stuff to do that needs concentration and whatnot.

(Also, while dizziness and headaches and stuff are normal for us with dissociation, if anyone else has problems with them overlapping, it’d probably be good to make sure and rule out any other causes and get checked, just to be sure and safe. C: )

[dinosaursindisarray]

Me: Time to clean up my drafts and finally get the queue going!

Drafts: 488

Me: 

Me:

Me: I know exactly how it got like this, but how did it get like this.