' there is good in everyone , all you have to do is look . '
// @mshiach
“given all you’ve told me about the world that got erased– it’s a little hard to believe.” bitterness BLOOMS in your soul and the watery laughter is cracked with it, spilling out of you and reaching out for anything it can get to. “how can EVERYONE have good in them? the people that used me– the people that supported my actions, prompted them– the people that HURT ME and came back to kill me? how can there be good in them?”
breath catches or whatever resides in the lungs of a ghost at least– and eyes CLOUD as they so often do ever since you clawed your way into this house and she left you alone with ghosts that refuse to talk to you. a sadness so deep clings to you and for once, the anger is subdued, is only embers as the open chasm within your chest takes hold, stutters breathing and causes body to tremble. hands shake as you lean forward, run them through your hair and lean upon them as you clench eyes tight– WAVES of pain roll through.
“WHY should i believe in the good of people when clearly NOBODY believed in me?” voice SCREAMS out and glass of windows shake in their panes but you know your power is muted, is a captive to these walls, will never hurt another again. your frustration is to stay locked away in here forever, wounds never to be healed and paid for.
gaze lifts and glazed eyes seek out his and not for the first time you wonder, but for the first time you voice the thought– “why didn’t you believe in me? you say you cared for me, that we had something special but– you didn’t save me. or is it because your words are just that. words. empty. lies. you don’t believe there was good in me, so i didn’t warrant saving?”