#08 au

[callmenani]

the hawthornes

[myasphodelmeadow]

💮 Untamed Fest 2019 💮

08 Soulmate AU First Words

As he does every night, Lan Zhan looks at the words on his left arm. The ink that once had been red, now it’s completely black. It’s the signal his soulmate has died. As if Lan Zhan could ever forget that. 

His fingers follow the path of the ink carefully, it reads: Second Master Lan, we have come from Yunmeng. His eyes fix on the last part: Yunmeng.

Lan Zhan was one of the few people whose words gave him a hint of where his soulmate was. Others would have rushed towards Yunmeng, but he waited. The words were clear: it was his soulmate the one who had to travel. The one that would come to him.

Would their history had ended differently if he had went to Yunmeng? Could they had averted the tragedy, then? Those are questions that never can be answered.

“Second Master Lan, we have come from Yunmeng”, he recites. Lan Zhan still finds amusing how proper the sentence is, and how it made him believe his soulmate was very polite. The reality was different. If he closes his eyes, he can still hear the coyness in Wei Ying’s tone.  

The memory doesn’t bring him any comfort. It’s just a reminder of the things he failed to protect. He couldn’t keep that smile on Wei Ying’s face. Lan Zhan could not save the one he loved. 

The next day, when he’s taking care of the rabbits Lan Zhan feels a sharp pain in his left wrist. Immediately, he rolls up his sleeve. Instead of finding the familiar words, new ones have appeared. 

Wei Ying’s words are gone. In its place there’s shiny red ink.

It’s been sixteen years. It feels like a dream.

Lan Zhan rubs them off, but they don’t change. If anything they seem to settle. He has heard of people who got a new set of words after the loss of their soulmate. But none of them mentioned the erase of the first one. And this never happened so long after said loss. 

He can barely contain his rage. How dare the gods take this away from him? The only sign of their shared bond. And how dare to insult his love for Wei Ying? The new words suggest Lan Zhan could devote himself to someone else. Even more offensive, they imply this person (for he would never call them soulmate) is someone from his past. It makes him feel ill.

How could anyone compare to Wei Ying? Lan Zhan does’t believe anyone can. Wei Ying was... is unique. There wouldn’t be another soul like his. And, in consequence, no other that Lan Zhan will accept as his partner. This has to be a mistake. 

It’s not a mistake. Lan Zhan comprehends this when he removes the mask from the stranger. Wei Ying’s face is exactly as Lan Zhan remembers it: from his long lashes to the bow of his lips. Lan Zhan takes Wei Ying’s wrist in his hands. He wonders what words are written there. 

Would it match his?

Lan Zhan puts the mask on the bedside table. He doesn’t want to move away, afraid that Wei Ying could disappear if he doesn’t look at him. (So many dreams had turned into nightmares because of that). And so Lan Zhan stays  there, observing the man sleep. He takes solace in the way his chest rises and falls rhythmically. It’s because of this, he realizes something is disturbing the man’s rest. 

He knows how to bring peace to Wei Ying’s dreams. Reluctantly, Lan Zhan stands up and goes to sit in front of his guqin. He starts to play. He’s so concentrated on the task, he doesn’t realize that Wei Ying has woken until the other speaks.

“It’s been sixteen years”, Wei Ying’s voice is barely a whisper. “It feels like a dream”.

The tension leaves Lan Zhan all at once. Wei Ying is alive, he’s really there. A small smile curves his lips. He was right, only Wei Ying could be his partner. He shifts in his seat to face Wei Ying, his soulmate.

The other man has sat on the bed and is looking at Lan Zhan expectantly. Lan Zhan hasn’t said anything yet. At least not to him. Will his words be written on Wei Ying’s skin? Or has destiny finally decided that he’s not worthy of someone as bright as him?

“You’re awake”, he finally says. Because in the end that’s all that matters. Wei Ying is alive and Lan Zhan is going to make sure he stays like that for many years. 

Wei Ying beams at him: his entire face glows with delight and then his vibrant laughter fills the Jingshi. For the first time in a long time, Lan Zhan feels at peace. The next thing Lan Zhan knows is that a very alive Wei Ying is in his arms. They embrace seeking the other warmth.

“Oh, Lan Zhan, I knew it”, Wei Ying murmurs into his ear. “It could only be you”.

[scottbcrowley2]

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