Boxing With God: The Power of Anointing, Part 27: God's Love Often times, I wonder why certain things happen the way they do. "Dear God," I'll say to myself, "why can't I just be in my own lane, do my work without extra obstacles?" Then God says, "What's the value of someone saying 'I love you' if their actions never had to prove it?" Dear God, I've had to hear 'I love you' said to me over and over throughout my time on Earth. We're taught from day 1 of our lives to love wrongly as if telling someone #ILoveYou was some kind of business transaction. I know from experience. It's hard to trust my own parents when they say "I love you" to me. For so long, it was said after they got something from me like money to partake in their #addictions & if I said no, I was hated. So many are like me, brainwashed into believing this false idea that to be "loved" means you give up all of your worth & be left with nothing valuable to show for it. It took me almost 30 years to come to this realization and begin to "self-repair" the damage of being your own parent, your own mother, your own father. I've learned to forgive but never forget, for there is value in those lessons looking back. There are times in this life, I feel conspired against, unjustly burdened, & unfairly condemned despite my desire to love & be loved. I realize now I am always loved. The proof is whenever I look back over certain instances of my life and say to myself, "How the hell did I survive that?" Honestly, I used to think God hated my very existence so much that it pleased him to witness the misery & misfortune of my own life. Now, I realize that God was experiencing all those moments with me. Until I learned to love the God within me, the God I prayed to for salvation & redemption could only do but so much. I've come to the realization that each one of us is here to learn how to love others as much as ourselves, in the way God loves us. Is this what the scriptures mean? To be love & love is a blessing & if God does that regardless, I don't need to wonder what else awaits me. #foodforthought #BoxingWithGod #instablogger #AllSeeingEye #morningmeditations #lifelessons #mindbodyspirit #1Corinthians29 (at Plainfield, New Jersey)