hey can u stop harassing my friend. please and thanks. they dont wanna talk to you anymore. i know youre upset but Stop. just let it go. i kno u dont know me or w/e this seems like it's coming out the sidehatch but idgaf to be quite honest.
ah, man, he’s really saying I harassed him i’m laughing so hard. I’m sorry but I’m going to take the time to explain everything that happened here, and I don’t know if you’re going to read it or not or even care about it or not, but here we go. it’s a wild ride, I hope you’re ready.
I met Silver three years ago. I met him through a mutual friend, Appi, who was my best friend at the time. At the time, Silver was really welcoming and open to me, and I thought he was really an amazing person and looked up to him a lot - I started calling him senpai at the time. After a while of rping indie with him and Jen and Appi, Appi called me to a group, and I joined with her - eventually, Appi and I started dating, but due to both of our mental illnesses clashing and a lot of issues, our relationship went bad. Appi neglected me, I ended up losing all of my friends because she was jealous when I roleplayed with people and got too close to them, and I ended up lonely and miserable when my depression got too bad, when she decided to start ignoring me.
So, we broke up, and I was alone and with no friends, so I went back to Jen and Silver in the hopes of making friends with them. They welcomed me with open arms, and greeted me happily. It was the first time in almost a year that I felt welcomed and it was the best feeling I had. I had hoped to actually have made friends that would stick, this time.
Silver, Jen and I would make chatzy chats to roleplay and talk and we had a lot of fun in them, we were in them every day - we had more threads with each other than we could count, and honestly it was a blast. It was the best time i had in a long time.
Well, things started to change, and I’m still not sure why. Silver stopped going to the chatzy chats. So, I got into a new series, and since Jen was the one in them, I showed her the series. We both got Silver into it - by introducing him to his beloved Rchimedes, because we wanted him to be a part of it. For some time, he started going back to the chats, but then he stopped again. We still had threads, but they were shorter than before. We started RPing the characters from Senyuu - I played Shion, Jen played Alba, and he played Rchimedes. He stopped showing up on Rchmiedes, after a while, and Jen and I continued playing, since we had fun.
Jen has no notebook, since hers is broken. She has no computer, either, and after a while, and still to this moment, she can’t roleplay on tumblr anymore. Silver, at this point, still didn’t go to the chatzy talks, so we stopped doing them and just started chatting on viber. Something I noticed, but I tried not to think about - Silver stopped talking to me.
It hurt. Since I looked up to Silver so much, having him just flat out ignore me like that for days, weeks and months when I had gone to him and Jen looking for support and friendship. But, I didn’t try to press him on it or complain - I mean. If he didn’t talk to me, it must be something I did. It surely was something I had done wrong. For some time, I had anxiety over this issue and, two or three times, I asked him if I had done something to make him angry or upset at me, and in these times, he always said I hadn’t. That he wasn’t upset, and that he just forgot to talk, and to not think much about it!! So I tried to do that, despite how much it scared me.
Eventually, I went back and even talked to Appi, but that’s something else. We’re on good terms, now, and she’s a nice person. But, that’s the weird thing. Silver didn’t go back to being a nice guy. He started making Jen anxious - he wouldn’t communicate to her. He would only talk to his blog, to his other friends, and Jen was ignored. Once he even went in a queerplatonic relationship with someone else - without even talking to her first, which, understandably, left her feeling cheated on.
Honestly? I started getting irritated. At least Jen was a cool person to me, and stuck by me even when I was in my lowest point - Silver didn’t.
But I still held myself back.
Silver then started to identify as an Otherkin. Now, I admit it’s not something I believe in. So, I went to do research. I went to google, I went to places outside of tumblr and spent over three weeks researching the subject to understand and open my mind to this subject. What I found out is that the community in tumblr is not representative of the real thing, and I went to talk to him, thinking we could even discuss it, and bond over this! Because even if I don’t believe in it, the real deal is interesting and I thought I could talk to him. Well, the conversation went on to him being nervous about people thinking he’s stupid, and I told him I didn’t think he was, and of course, told him that while I didn’t believe in it, more power to him.
Eventually, Jen and I tried to make chatzys with him again. We had one or two successful ones, before a last one - where he snapped at us for not doing things like calling or watching things.
Now, if you remember, Jen has no computer or laptop. I have anxiety, and live in a third world country with a really bad internet. Those are things we can’t do. And he immediately went in a rant and snapped at us for it, and got upset. I tried to make things lighter by talking about this game I was playing on my psp that had been localized for ps4, this really nice game called Final Fantasy type-0, but he was utterly bored and dismissive of anything I had to say on the subject.
I went on to fangirl about this game to Jen-senpai for weeks after that.
Ironically, a while later, he showed up being obsessed with this game.
Our last chat on viber before today, was my calling him out on it- because i was hurt and tired of all of this - asking him about it. I tried to show him things, I tried being interested in things and I was trying really hard to be supportive and give him advice and be a good friend. I was ignored - not only my advice, but also my presence and existence. He didn’t acknowledge I existed, much less that I said anything - even after I went to the hospital, in the ICU for four days.
So when I heard what happened with Jen and him today - I had enough and went to confront him. And he greets me by saying that yes, he avoided talking to me, because I called him a disappointment and said he was overreacting.
tl;dr: grow up, silver. if you’re not going to actually own up to messing up, at least don’t hide behind people
