#2018-03-12

[background-bing]

Sanderlings sleeping on a beach in Terschelling, Netherlands

[inigopmul]

walking the trash bags

[krissitivity]

[iamwhoiam-]

The Idea of Him

I have been missing him more and more these days. It might just be because I will be seeing him this Sunday and that anxiety is just building up.

I think about our relationship and I wonder if I made a mistake. I think about him at night before I fall asleep and wish that he was sleeping beside me too. Maybe i am just taking all of the good parts and mashing it together to create a perfect idea of him. I may be idealizing him too much and I know I should not, because we broke up for a reason and that reason was because he was not making me happy.

Every time we would go out or every time I would ask him to do something he was so negative. I don’t know. Maybe if he was more optimistic, our relationship would work out more. And maybe if he pushed me more out of my comfort zone to achieve things, I would be better than I am now, but I guess that is up to me. It is my life. 

I also think I am placing too much weight in this bf gf thing... can’t I be happy on my own? 

[myepisodecalendar]

Jeopardy! Season 2018 - Episode 51: 2018-03-12 AirDate: March 12nd, 2018, 07:00 PM