#21dpo

[waitingforourfuture]

CD45, 21DPO

... THE FUCK, AF.

I need to find a free clinic or something, or get my health insurance back, so I can go get blood work done. I know my doctors back in NY wouldn't even give you an appointment if you didnt have insurance, not sure how it works down here in VA.

So far, 3 BFN's, and one "dud" test. Gonna test again on Monday, because I'll be 3 weeks late by then, if AF doesn't show.

ALWAYS hungry, always sleepy, gassy, super bloated, on-and-off constipated, and a new-found hatred of my former favorite candy Reese's cups ): If I am pregnant this baby better not hate Reese's. 

[waitingforourfuture]

Damnit.

BFN.

Got impatient for the morning and just took one, and there wasn't even a moment of "well maybe there's a faint line, maybe I'm just not seeing it". 

It sucks. :/ Because I know I should be relieved that it didn't happen, because it's no where near the right time. But I really had my hopes up, because I know as soon as I saw that positive I'd do everything in my power to make a good life for that baby.

Oh well.

There's plenty of time in the future.