And? My emotions returned. It was fun while it lasted. Here I go, even crying for forty minutes or some shit.
I feel like such a burden to S. But I also feel incredibly frustrated that the work that I DO do isn't given credit. He's frustrated that he drives me places, but yo the apartment doesn't clean itself either.
I'm frustrated that I still don't know how to drive. So frustrated. I'm pretty helpless bc I'm broke and can't drive. It's fucking horrible. Both of my younger siblings drive, and I can't. And at this point in my life do I really have an excuse?? Sure, at 15 I was scared bc I'd gotten hit, but then it was just laziness. And I failed the permit test at 20. So here I am.
I asked S if we could go to the grocery store tomorrow, and he got on my case about variety and challenging myself. Like I don't already do that? I try really hard. I hate that no matter how hard I'm ALWAYS trying, it's always hard and it's never enough. My ED just laughs at me and yells more.