Discover Top Posts Tagged with #6.19.18

“Native”

Wanted to post something a bit more abstract and today, I saw these beautiful tree/ tree stump details. They are so natural, but if you look at them long enough, scenes unfold.(6.19.18)

#source:missinvisibleandco #native #nature photography #nature #wood #tree trunk #details #patterns #shapes #365 photo challenge #6.19.18 #abstract #abstract reality #things I notice #the way I see the world

so she confirmed it…

Thanks for sending this in! But yeah, she’s all but confirmed it without explicitly saying it. I’ve told you guys that this is absolutely PR, and things are only going to get more bumpy from here. There’ll eventually end up being a massive confirmation post made by Lierra, much like Mystal, and then all hell will actually break loose in the fandom.

This is management’s idea of warming us up to the Big Reveal. Slowly, but surely. First the interview, now Sierra’s tweet. Mystal came out of nowhere and hit the fandom like a train. Management just wants to make sure that we’ll be more likely to buy this heaping pile of shit this time around, than we were last time.

But it’ll eventually be revealed beyond a reasonable doubt; I’m calling it right now. But, no matter when or how it’s confirmed, nothing changes the fact that there are heaps of evidence from the last 6-8 months that starkly contradicts anything about this Lierra mess being real and genuine.

It’s easy to be upset and fall into managements fly trap, but just remember this. There’s too much evidence built up, to just blindly believe what they’re trying to sell the fans.

#just to be crystal clear!#sierra deaton #6.19.18 #owner #submission

6.19.18

Today was so difficult. I don't know what came over me, but during meal group I froze up and shut down. I stared off into space and maybe managed 15% of my meal. After group, the meal group leader asked me if I wanted to get better, and I just nodded—because, yeah, I do. I started crying. She told me she strongly encouraged me to drink a boost, which to me made it feel like an option. After all, she couldn't make me, and "nobody really cares if I eat enough" (which is false obviously but I couldn't realize that at the time).

Anyways I got the boost, but I didn't initially drink it, just held onto it. I went back to my seat on the couch to check out. When it was my turn to check out with a take away from the day, I just said "I don't know," and Laurie (my case manager) just nodded and moved on. It's not that I have NO positive take aways from the day, but rather I was just so shut down I couldn't articulate.

The group ended, and I just curled up on the couch, as we're allowed to stay for a while after group. A couple of other girls were talking nearby, and another patient I get along well with, B, put her hand on my leg and asked if I was okay, and I said no. She came over and sat next to me, but I was just so shut down she couldn't really do much to help. She asked me to drink my boost, and I did open it up and have a sip. She said she hoped I felt better soon, and she left. Eventually once everyone except one other patient had left, I just laid down on the couch and cried. My thoughts were (and had been) spiraling into how worthless/obnoxious/etc I was. I just felt like such a burden, additionally, so trapped by my options (start dealing with trauma and become suicidal vs. stay in ED) neither of which are viable.

Eventually, a therapist happened to walk through the room. I'm not sure if he saw me, but it stirred me, so I got up. I went to the bathroom and blew my nose, then I went to the waiting area to call my lyft. Right before I would have hit confirm, Laurie walked in and sat down across from me. We talked a little bit, and she convinced me to drink some more boost. She talked about how I had more options than what I perceive, and how I am doing a good job being honest about what help I do need. She told me me to stay around a little longer until I calm down.

As I waited, another patient, J, came down from upstairs and asked if I was OK. I sort of shrugged, and J asked if she could sit with me. I nodded.

Quick background: In the past, J has shared a lot about her trauma and her struggles. J is 63, and has been in and out of treatment for a long time, but she is just now dealing with her traumas and she has A LOT to process. Anyways, one particular day after she shared, I had approached her after group and told her that her sharing made me feel safe and as though I could consider sharing. Another time I shared about struggling with self harm (or rather Laurie shared on my behalf but with my permission and then I picked up where she left off), and she (J not Laurie) approached me after group and let me know that she has also struggled with self harm and that if I ever needed to talk someone she was there. Point being that J and I have been empathizing and offering support for each other quite a few times before.

Anyways back to today, J sat with me, and she said alot. She said that we have suffered enough, and we don't need to continue suffering by beating ourselves up. And as she spoke she started tearing up. She said she cared about me, and she wanted me to be safe, and it was so authentic, it really brought me back from my negative self talk. We exchanged numbers as well and said we'd check in on each other sometimes/if we needed.

At that point I was feeling quite a bit better, and then I got a really sweet response from S (in response to my downward-spiral, verging on suicidal, text messages): "I don't think anyone in your life would prefer if you disappeared. You're not a burden to us. We want you to get better so you can enjoy your life, with us." And it just made me smile. I'm still depressed but I'm feeling alot more hopeful right now. And yes, I did finish the boost. I plan to have my evening snack per usual later.

#personal #6.19.18 #tw negative

#relapse #6.19.18 #family

Sorry about that. Again. But WHAT THE HELL?

Lmfao, no worries, thanks for sending this! But as I said before, it’s not a great quality video by any stretch of the imagination. We can’t even tell if the person back there is Sierra (there looks to be at least 2-4 people back there), or what sorts of movements are going on. It’s just not clear enough, and you won’t ever catch me taking Lierra stans for their word on anything, because they’re completely unreliable. You know?

#sierra deaton #luke hemmings #6.19.18 #owner #submission

Hello. ıt’s me. Again. My name is Querida. I’M GLAD TO MEET YOU. First the all I LOVE YOU BOTH. I dont know you but I DO. And THIS BLOG everythig!

And I hate this İnstagram account. Naaah!!

I've watched the video like, at least 30 times by now, and I can't see anything that would make me think that Luke asked Sierra for her opinion on it. The video is too grainy, and the last thing in the world I'm going to do, is take Lierra stans on their word for something like this.

The Wango Tango Valentine performance, where they tried to spin the narrative into Luke looking at Sierra, when he was actually looking at the guitar tech, is precisely why I don't trust them. Lmfao. So basically, HQ pics or didn't happen. You know? I hate that account too!

But hi, Querida is a cool name! I love you too, you're so sweet! 💞💞

#sierra deaton #luke hemmings #6.19.18 #owner #submission