The Duties of an Older Sister
- When you little brother is on a week-long (or longer) holiday/school trip and your parents are getting antsy, reminding him than an *ahem* very spontaneous phone call would be welcome and bring him back into their graces;
- Knocking at his bedroom door when he’s supposed to be sleeping because no, dumbass, I know you’re awake, the light’s filtering through the bottom of the door, do you really think Mom and Dad aren’t going to notice? (If you really want to keep reading, use a torch and stay under the blankets.);
- Reminding him of your parents’ anniversary, Father’s Day, and Mother’s Day so he can (once again, very spontaneously) wish them happy holiday;
- Jokingly remind him to take his suitcase when he gets off the train so he won’t (once again) forget it but he also won’t have reasons to get angry at your parents because they don’t trust him if they are the ones reminding him;
(Okay I’m actually with my parents on this one because he has forgotten/lost even quite important stuff – like his wallet with the ID a few days before a school trip abroad, the house keys twice – multiple times, he would forget his head if it wasn’t attached to his neck, the entire suitcase – never recovered – was just the icing of the cake, but teens are teens. So, I do damage control.)
- No, our parents won’t know anything about the time you were convinced you had lost your scarf inside Paris metro and it turned out it was simply tucked inside your coat and you hadn’t noticed; (You’ll never let him live it down in private, though.)
- Leaving everything and getting to his school at 8:30 am after you got a frantic phone call (from the school’s bathroom) because he forgot the permission slip for his school trip and it was the last day to bring it. Your mother will never know anything, of course; He was really lucky I was home because it was finals period, though.
- Hey I let you sleep until 12 pm because we’re on holiday but now you have to get up because Mom is coming back soon and you know she doesn’t like us sleeping in... We’ll tell her you woke up at 10 am, okay?
- Drilling him on English irregular verbs because he’s too lazy to study on his own;
- Helping him with Chemistry at 10 pm the day before the test because he’s panicking after realizing that he really procrastinated for too long;
- Learning how to crack Europa Universalis IV because your parents are against spending so much money on video games; It turned out his PC didn’t fit the requirements, though.
- Yeah Mom of course he called to say he was having lunch with his friends instead of coming home oh I must have forgotten to tell you I’m sorry! (He didn’t.)
