Discover Top Posts Tagged with #7oct2014

Jiva Dhara #gwk #bali #7oct2014 (at GWK ( Garuda Wisnu Kencana ) Bali Cultural Park)

#7oct2014 #bali #gwk

I realised since the day you left me, something inside me changed, something I couldn't even control anymore. I think I got so tired of living in fear that you would leave me, that that fear has turned from fear to anger; I got so angry with myself along the way and the angrier I got the more I had to protect my heart from breaking. You left me, I can't chase you anymore and it's been over a month now but I'm still holding on ... I don't know how but I am. I only cried that night, took it out of my system and since then I haven't cried over you (...well yet, I hope not). I was so mentally and physically prepared that on the long run I just became a little more heartless. I hate that I feel like I've become this, but if it's the only way to keep me from breaking down then let it be.

I still miss you, I still care about you and I admit I still love you ... but just because I do it doesn't mean that I have to keep chasing you. I just can't do that anymore, that was the last time and that's all I can handle. If you have the courage to come and find me, then do but I won't keep my hopes high, I wouldn't dare to.

There are days where I feel sick thinking that I've become this person, not sure if it's a defence mechanism but I'm still so hurt by your actions that I can't help it. I try so hard to distract myself from entering the doors of past memories just to keep sane. I know one day I'll move on and not be so hurt and wondering what I've done so wrong to deserve this.

I kinda wish things turned out differently but this is life, I need to get past this anger and pain and move on with my life, with or without you.

#myviewz #tz #7oct2014