This year has been an exciting time for the revival of hit shows from the 1990s. Twin Peaks is making its return on Showtime. The X-Files will be back on FOX soon. Full House is becoming Fuller House (unclear, though, if this is a reboot of Bob Saget’s program, or a separate show about a Fuller family).
It is obvious that this is a huge boom in popular culture. It’s a money maker, and it’s only going to get bigger. The people want to relive the ‘90s! And I’m going to capitalize on this, because I need money, and I need to reset my image. So I am bringing back the ‘90s.
I am, indeed, a true ‘90s kid. Born in 1992, the ‘90s ended when I was just 7 years old. I obviously don’t remember too much of it. But I do remember who I was. As such, I would like to announce the following changes in my life, to be instated in the coming months:
I will hereby only watch Jumanji, Star Wars and Aladdin. I will be making my friends, family and co-workers reenact scenes from the films. I always get to be the good guy.
I will, from here on out, strum my ukulele wherever I go. I am Raffi, or perhaps Pauls Simon or McCartney. I think it is a guitar and will act accordingly.
Every day at work I will be wearing suspenders. I think it makes me look like a grown up, which I am not.
Most importantly, I hereby refuse to have any adult responsibilities. Thus I will not be spending any money or going to work ever again. It’s time for the ‘90s reboot, baby!
