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I found these ... little men, in a magazine. With city names, for each one, so you can see where each little cake man was born. And @thesketcherlass was immediately like “please. please. memes”

so. Tag yourself.

#tag yourself I'm #memes #A raptoriginal #I'm definitely melting #friendmily

I was just sitting in the bus in the Standard Public Transport Trance and I was thinking things to myself in English but not quite aware enough to be conscious about which language i was attempting, and one of those cars you use for transporting coffins drove past, and I do not know the name of those in English but my brain sure didn't care and just filled in, so what happened was that I was staring out the window and then suddenly mumbled to myself, "oh, that's a corpse wagon"

#death cw #bird stands in Internet Field and Yells #a raptoriginal #oh. it's a corpse wagon.

Me 3 years ago when moving out for the first time: Brings with me 1 plant that has proved nigh unkillable and gets upset when my mom gives me another succulent bc I’m sure I will forget to water it

Me now: Plants fucking love me. They love me so much. I forgot an onion in my vegetable drawer 2 months ago and it’s sprouting. My potatoes are trying to break out of the fridge and into the wild. I’m basically a necrobotanist by now. That plant is dead? No its not. I would fight & bleed for these leafy motherfuckers. You have a cactus, I will kiss it. I will kiss the cactus, right on the spines.

#plants #plant mom raptor #vulture weirdo gremlin tag #children of dirt #a raptoriginal #bird stands in Internet Field and Yells

Catch me out in public acting like I’m a real person until I come across an obstacle that I for undefined reasons decide to pronk across

#Bird stands in Internet Field and Yells #A Raptoriginal #how am I able to spronk when I have only 2 legs? Thats for me to know and you to wonder but rest assured #I will Do it #this was the post that led me to my unfortunate (s)pronk discovery btw #I hope you all appreciate my sacrifice

ARM PANTS, or ANTS™ - PANTS FOR ARMS! All the discomfort of pants for legs, now for ARMS!

My friends had to suffer through this and now you do too

#A raptoriginal #friendmily #ANTS (arm pants)

So. Hey. I know “don’t let negativity get to you” isn’t very useful advice, because oh wow, everyone is being negative, I guess it’s up to me to ignore them then, but. I’m serious. Don’t, let it get to you, don’t even let it get NEAR you. Push it away w a broomshaft. File for a restriction order. Climb into a tree and throw rocks at negativity until it fucks off. Tell ppl to stop being shits, block that one person whose opinion on crocs or Goof Troop or Sonic the Hedgehog makes you feel displeased, just DO IT. Being critical is important but needless negativity just SUCKS, so don’t let it GET to you. Push it away! Tell it it’s not welcome! Hit it over the head with a broomshaft! Believe me, it’s WORTH it, and you GOTTA! YOU GOTTA!!

#Bird stands in Internet Field and Yells #a raptoriginal #i have a lot of feelings abt this like don't!! let the world be terrible! tell negativity it can go suck it! eat a cookie! then eat ANOTHER #WELL DONE IM PROUD OF YOU #-loud support noises-#best of

Okay but everyone I feel like we are overlooking a very important opportunity as fiction writers here:

Space fairies

Fairies are tied to nature, but they're also from Another place. They're the reason you don't cut down that old oak, or go on the narrow path at night, if you cross them or take what is theirs they will absolutely fuck you up, they play by other rules and we don't understand them.

Aliens may have different norms and cultures and a whole other biology, but they still belong in this universe and they're still tied to our rules. Who says the veil can't be thin on other planets? Imagine alien civilizations where That One Natural Rock Formation is off limits because if you as much as chip that rock you absolutely will have bad luck for the next seven years. Places you just Don't Go. You ask for an explanation because you know that terrain is never what it seems on other planets and maybe there's beasts or toxic gasses in that area but people avoid the subject, or it's tradition, or they tell you it's just, not a good place, and nobody will explain further. Nobody can explain

And out there, figures that look eeriely like the creatures of the planet do their equivalent of dancing and singing, and even though humans can't hear the song of the locals and even less that of the fae, the feeling is there, you can feel the pull and the trembling of the soul and the feeling that you want to run to it and never turn back and also you know you should be running as fast as you can in the opposite direction RIGHT NOW.

The fair folk is different everywhere, on every planet, and yet no matter how different your planets are, there will be aliens who nod solemly, they know the feeling exactly, even through translation channels and body language that cannot possibly be translated to human gesture, you know that you have shared the exact same feeling.