#about flame

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Me irl vs. my online flame persona. I figured it was about time I did something like this :)

...plus a bonus diagram thingy that I finally gained just enough courage to make adgjllfs

I've wanted to try making one of these for a while now but have always been way too embarrassed lmao. What can I say? It's a fun concept.

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After weeks and weeks of hating being made to go to church each sunday (I'm home from school for the summer), I finally gained some courage to take a small step in the right direction.

I just told my conservative (pro-life) mom that I wouldn't go to church tomorrow because roe v wade is stressing me out and it's all people are going to be talking about--and I live in a very red state. She seemed annoyed but didn't fight me on it (thank goodness). Granted, I wouldn't want to go to church even if politics weren't bad right now, but it was a good scapegoat. Looks like I will survive another week longer.

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If anyone is interested in seeing a personal art piece I did today ("personal" as in it's about my actual life and not fandom. I know, unheard of lol) and/or read an angsty vent to go along with it, check out my main blog! :D (tw/cw: loss and grief)

I didn't want to reblog it here bc my sister follows my main blog and I don't really want to take the chance of her seeing me here :> but I'm pretty freaking proud of it!

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About Me

Here's a bit about me, probably more than you'll ever want or need to know! Feel free to send asks with questions; I generally don't mind talking about my personal life.

Updated: June 27, 2023.

Art

I started drawing when I was 11, when I first picked up an interest in reading (the seed that started my fan art journey!) but I wasn't super serious about it. I wanted to be good of course, but at the time I really wasn't willing to work for it.

I would draw casually throughout middle and high school but it wasn't until late high school and into college that I started to really work for it. The summer after my freshman year of college I picked up digital art for the first time, and boy have I come a long way since then!

Music

I play the cello, some piano, and ukulele (I'm waaay out of practice with all of these, though). I also did 10 semesters of voice lessons during my time in college, just for fun

Education & Future Goals

As far as my listening tastes go, my main genre would probably be best classified as indie-pop. I'm also a sucker for string music or orchestration of any kind, including filmscores and video game soundtracks. I also love soft, stripped back acoustic sounds with a lot of emphasis on vocals.

Current favorite recording artists to listen to include dodie, Sleeping At Last, Billie Eilish, AJR, and Cavetown

I went to the same arts school for 13 years (K-12) where I grew up with music, dance, theater, and of course visual arts. Art and music have been an enormous part of my life, though I enjoy the other two as well.

I recently graduated with a BA in Digital Media with a concentration in Video & Film and Storytelling. Someday I want to work on a film set or in an animation team, fleshing out characters, building storylines, editing, or any other job in the field of entertainment and storytelling.

Misc./Other

I’m aroace! I've toyed with a lot of micro labels, but my sexuality seems to be fluid enough that's its easier to just use an umbrella term like asexual and aromantic. If you want to know how I feel about my micro labels currently, I tend to stick with gray-asexual and demi-romantic.

I have a INTJ-T personality. I also recently learned I'm a 5w4 on the enneagram!

I have an older sister (who's also here on tumblr 👀) and a younger brother, both of who I love very much! My family also has two kitties, Thor and Loki.

I'm fascinated by the world of character design. Like many others, a character's unique design is often what pulls me into a piece of media. I would love to bring back some of my old OCs or work on creating new ones in the future.

I want to get into cosplay! I've dreamt about it for years, but now that I'm older, have a little more money, freedom, and confidence, I'm hoping to get going on that soon. :)

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what first got you in to tickling? if u had to try to remember as far back as you can

Oh man, talk about a hard one! Sorry this took a while, I was waiting until I could come up with a decent answer 😆

Since I'm in the mood for an in-depth analysis, long answer below the cut!

I'm actually not sure any one thing or moment got me into it, I've always just been fascinated by it for as long as I can remember. It's actually kind of funny, because for the longest time I didn't actually like being tickled as a kid (at least, that's what I thought), I just liked the idea of it. I realized later that it was because the way I always got tickled (by family members) was waaay too intense and overwhelming for me to enjoy it. It also often felt... manipulative? Like, if I was upset because someone said something that hurt my feelings, they'd just tickle me so I physically couldn't stay upset at them and I didn't like that. I'd always just freeze up and try not to give the reaction they wanted so that they'd stop. I would watch others get tickled and kind of envy the way they seemed to have fun.

Then I got into my first and longest relationship of ten years, and though I didn't have the vocabulary for it at the time, he was a HUGE ler, so tickling slowly became a way of playing and/or showing affection in our relationship.

Fast forward to 2019 when I (re)joined Tumblr and unintentionally stumbled upon t-fics, which I consumed with a fury. I think that was the start of me realizing and admitting to myself I was into it. In the same area of time (late 2019 to early 2020) I had a couple really good experiences with tickling in that relationship that just solidified in my mind that I enjoyed it. Ironically, we broke up that April (2020) before I really gained the courage to tell him how I really felt about it, sooo that was the end of that 😅 and I haven't gotten much more than a poke or prod from anyone since! Woo hoo! /s

So yeah, I guess that's my "journey" with it. I'm still kind of a noob with this whole thing tbh 😂 Also I feel like this overview is neglecting the embarrassing "in-denial" phase of my teen and pre-teen years, because I definitely went through the whole "looking up videos in secret then immediately deleting my history" and "looking up 'drawing references'" lmao.

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Trying out some new pronouns for this blog (my main blog has ppl who I know irl). Updated in my bio 😎✌️

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17, 42 and 43 sound very cool, please :D !

Hey Kanene! Thanks for the ask! :D

17. Whats your favourite piece of clothing you own?

I'm not sure if I have a favorite (I'm bad with favorites lol), but there's this one sweater I have that's like my go-to sweater--it's just a simple yellow knitted sweater but for some reason I just really love the cozy vibe it brings 💛

42. Whats your favourite physical feature about yourself?

Like a lot of us, that's something I've struggled with answering... I tend to find the tiniest flaws in every part of me. Maybe my smile? It's a little crooked but I think it can be kind of cute in its own quirky little way

43. What do you think is your best talent?

That's another tough one, but I guess I'll go with playing music??? I'm savvy in more than one instrument and I've worked hard the last couple of years trying to relearn some music theory. Though I do tend to think of my music abilities more as a skill than a talent, since it wasn't something I was naturally good at 😆