Sighing, Maia tossed her bag into the corner of her room and flopped back down on her bed. She was spent. Every bone in her body ached—the early morning runs, the cohort training, and then her new mission to patrol New Rome handing out leaflets and keeping the Romans in check? It was taking a toll on her. Reaching over for her phone, she thumbed through her contacts list, mentally trying to figure out who would be free tonight. But…
She pressed down on the power button and shut off her phone, a slight wave of anxiety creeping through her as she did so. Maia hated being without her phone—it was what kept her in touch with all the people she cared about, it carried her entire agenda, her whole life, essentially. But, it wasn’t good to keep it on when she was trying to focus on something else. Maia walked over to her desk and pulled out the charcoal pencil she’d bought for this specific purpose and began to draw the symbols Lina had shown her on her hands. Her hands were clumsy, not used to doing something so precise, but she managed to draw some shaky symbols onto the backs of her hands and along her fingers.
Maia pulled the small quartz crystal necklace from where she kept it tucked under her shirt and let it rest in the open palm of her hand. Folding her legs underneath her, Maia shut her eyes and began to focus on letting go of the intrusive thoughts that ran through her brain. She sucked in a deep breath and held it, doing her best to focus on the beating of her heart, the blood pumping through her veins, the air in her lungs.
But, try as she might, thoughts kept racing through her head; how were her former Greek legionnaires? Were her Roman soldiers obeying her orders, did they still respect her? Did Fergus still respect her? Had she lost his trust? Lost the trust of her brother?
Gritting her teeth, Maia forced herself to keep her breathing calm in spite of the racing thoughts and rising tides of anxiety that threatened to throw her out of balance. No, she was supposed to be meditating. She needed to focus. Focus on… not thinking, but feeling. Frowning, she did her best to calm her mind and divert her attention within. Just breathe. All she needed to do was breathe and sit and focus.
As she did so, Maia began to be aware of a strange coolness inside of her, a really bizarre lack of warmth that seemed to emanate from inside her chest. It was uncomfortable, but not bad? She tried to reach out for it, tried to mentally grasp it inside her mind’s eye. But, when she reached out to touch the energy, it latched onto her, consuming her. The coldness enveloped her sense of self and a strangled gasp escaped her lips as she grappled with this power. Her fingers clasped around the quartz in her hand as she continued to hold onto the sensation. She couldn’t run away from this power, she couldn’t.
Maia needed to control this side of her. She had to. If she wanted to aid the Greeks, she couldn’t do it as a recognizable authority figure of the Legion. And she couldn’t be recognized by her Roman legionnaires unless she wanted to be alone again. Holding her breath, Maia did her best to hold the sensation as she opened her eyes and looked down at herself.
She saw nothing. For a moment, she saw nothing but the down comforter of her bed, slightly depressed by her weight against the fabric. An involuntary gasp escaped her and her legs stuttered back into sight. The quartz fell from her fingers and her entire body returned. The horrible cold sensation faded away, but she pulled one of her sweatshirts on all the same. Staring down at the symbols drawn on her hands, Maia chewed the inside of her cheek before rubbing the charcoal away, smearing the dust against her skin.
Walking out to the barrack bathroom, she washed the symbols from her hands, scrubbing at her skin to make them go away. Even as the dark marks began to fade away, Maia couldn’t shake the feeling of… disgust. Dirtiness. She hated the way her godly powers made her feel, hated the coldness, hated the fact that it was so intrinsically connected with her father. She was like her father. Oh, gods, she was like her father.
Immediately, nausea rushed over her and she gagged. Gripping the edge of the sink, Maia shook her head. No, no, no. Just because she had this power, it didn’t make her like him… Did it? He only ever used it to manipulate people to his will, for his own gain and amusement. She, she’d never do that. She’d never use her powers for herself. Maia splashed some water in her face and stared at herself in the mirror, tired eyes reflecting back at her.
She wasn’t going to be like her father. No, she was going to use this power for something bigger than herself.
||Because Mun was bored, here's what Maia's desk looks like most of the time. The desk itself would probably be a very light pink but my printer wouldn't pick it up. The box of treats in the bottom right corner are a treat commonly found in Pink Kingdom that I may touch on later. - Manuka||
