How to Help People.
(Sorry this post was posted at 7 AM EST, I forgot to make a post yesterday. Sorry for the inconvenience)
Someone asked “How do I help people?” the other day, and so I made this guide.
Step 1: Do things for people without them asking for it.
This can include giving them money, and of course doing things that are potentially destructive, err I mean totally safe, for no reason.
Step 2: Make people do things they don’t want to do, but is probably good for them.
This can include forcing someone to go to college, start a relationship with someone they don’t like, and even making them destroy the universe!
Step 3: Tell them you’re “Only helping them” if they resist you.
This makes them think they’re crazy for not just blindly listening to you and doing what you say.
Step 4: Blindly follow these steps without questioning anything.
Trust me, these will work. And if they don’t, I won’t do anything about it! Err, I mean you’ll get your money back. This was free, so that’ll be 0.00 back to you. You’re welcome for that.
Step 5: Help Everyone
You need to follow steps 1-3 over and over again on everyone you meet so everyone can be helped and be happy! Else, you haven’t done enough in your life, and that’s not good...
If you followed these steps you should be a really great person that’s helping everyone. You’re welcome for that.
