dawson’s creek characters ranked based on their driving abilities
1: andie. andie’s fucking perfect at driving and has never once in her life gone above the speed limit but is such an insufferable backseat driver that she gets points off for that. 9.5/10
2: pacey. yeah he canonically failed his pencil-and-paper driving test the first time but we all know tests aren’t his strong suit and his instincts are notoriously incredible. probably passed the practical exam with flying colors because he’s been driving since far before he was legally allowed to. likes to brag that he’s never gotten a speeding ticket and everyone else is like “shut the fuck up, there are, like, two cops in this town and they’re your dad and your brother.” 9/10 a certified Good Driver.
3: joey. a perfectly decent driver. a bit of a speed demon sometimes but not so much so that it’s dangerous. sometimes gets a bit too caught up in adjusting the radio because she needs the vibes to be absolutely right. pacey taught her basically everything she knows though so she’s pretty solid. 8/10 thoroughly average.
4: dawson. the thing about dawson is that he can drive fine but he drives so fucking slow that it’s excruciating. everything’s an ordeal with this bitch. gotta check his goddamn mirrors fifteen times before pulling out of the driveway. absolutely incapable of doing two things at once and has to pull over to the side of the road if he wants to, like, turn on his windshield wipers or fix the air conditioner settings or something. can’t drive if there’s music on the radio. can’t drive and talk at the same time. 6.5/10 good effort.
5: jack. his two personality traits in s2 were Gay and Clumsy so i’m gonna go ahead and say he’s fucking shit at driving. he doesn’t like to do it and he’s not very good at it. a lose-lose situation. he could probably get better at it if he tried but he has a tendency to panic when he does something wrong so he just makes andie drive him everywhere until she leaves for italy and then relies on dawson despite his being the slowest most inefficient driver known to man because dawson is the only member of the gang that consistently drives carefully enough that jack doesn’t get horribly motion-sick. 5/10 for him.
6. jen. jen sucks shit at driving and failed her driver’s test three times before she went back to schedule another test date and the lady at the DMV told her that she actually passed her last test. she’s 99% sure that it was a computer error because she remembers crying to jack over how badly she did but she doesn’t ask questions and is now the proud owner of a completely unearned massachusetts driver’s license. she is also Convinced that she’s not a bad driver. she saw sandra bullock in speed and thought “yeah, I could do that.” she could not in a million years do that. she flies through red lights because she forgets to look at them and makes u-turns regularly. she’ll be going like 70 miles a fucking hour and applying mascara in her mirror while also eating a bagel. 1/10 not allowed to drive the gang anywhere ever.
