weird rant thing
had a first meeting with a psychologist who specializes in CDDs and childhood trauma. he's a little old, he's nice, and he was a good listener. we cracked some jokes and had a good meeting overall.
i talked, a lot, and at the end i asked what he thinks it is.
he said "it sounds like DID."
i don't believe that entirely. he gave me a wonky definition of the differences between DID and OSDD, saying: "if the alters take control over you its DID, if they dont its OSDD."
i know thats incorrect. but god, im pretty jarred about the clear answer. its somehow validating. even if it's not DID like he said, its gotta be something, right?
there's still a part of me that is convinced i lied through my teeth in this appointment. i know i didnt, but i still can't believe its real. that we're real.
super confused. this is not an official diagnosis whatsoever, but it seems to have some impact on how we're feeling.
will see a psychiatrist soon to get a final answer. the denial is creeping into my mind like a disease.
or is it denial, if i might not have anything in the first place?
