“philly’s in charge”
“i look like a bush”
“it’s comin at ya like a big ass”
“here we are, a couple of crusty mushroom people”
“i could shape that bush into something lush”
“i tried to remove my contact lenses from my raw eyeballs”
“sometimes I just make saliva-ry noises”
“what is the phgender”
“it would be actively like you’re trying to drown dan and phil”
“there’s no dry bottoms in this house”
“two 50% shit top and bottoms”
“phil lester presents frosting and anal!”
“my butt is clenched”
“i will have nightmares over phil’s ‘tops only’ bar”
“spreading those buttered creams”
“i think we should both be arrested”
“cupcakes, lattes, a cheeky smile and a wink”
“choke bitch”
“they like to call you daddy”
“did you birth squirrels out of your headgina?”
“i feel roasted because of the flames of hell are tickling me from underneath”
“it’s like a slab of wood up your ass”
“they deserve your uncomfortable ass”
“clench your cheeks for talent”
“petrol daddy destroy the earth, get in my nose”
“that’s us 100% whacked”
and other things said by dan and phil on stereo