For as long as I exist
Aegnor x fem reader
Prompt: Aegnor x princess Reader angst + Reader being born in Valinor as a Elf maiden and reuniting with him. Please! 🥺🛐
Requested by: anonymous
A/n: I wasn't entirely sure how to give shape to the story so I went with a human -> elf rebirth trope. I hope you like it! And thank you for requesting. 🥰
warnings: angst/hurt(+comfort), mentions of death.
"For as long as I exist, I will love you..."
Those words were the last thing you could remember of all the things Aegnor had promised you so many years ago. It had been so long, that by now you were frail and grey haired. 60 solar years had passed since your fleeting romance and bitter separation, and of Aegnor you knew only that he perished in war through the occasional elven gossip.
Why had he never bothered to return before? Not even once! He had gone away one day and ever since no matter where you searched no trace of him was found. He had said he'd return to you soon, but reality proved otherwise.
And if for your current human existence it had not been enough of a letdown, there had been rumors about Aegnor and a lady named Saelind. It had made your already bruised heart weep all the more bitterly.
Your grieving mind kept feeding you those beautiful few years of romance over and over. When you had been just about 20 years of age. Young, fair and free to do as you pleased. It reminded you of your first encounter, sitting by the riverbank in your favorite cornflower blue dress. The first rays of spring sun casting a warm glow on the fresh grass, and the loveliest flowers blooming in the meadow around you. You were not as vigilant as your brother was, who could be considered a bloodhound when it came to finding things and noticing presences in a room. You were a little less so, leaving you spooked often.
And this was the way you had met Aegnor. He had crept up behind you and hid among the blossoming peach trees. Observing you from a distance. Slowly he walked towards you until he was but a hairsbreadth away from you. His much taller form casting a shadow over where you sat. It was fair to say that in that moment your vocal capacity could've made a banshee jealous. You had left the poor elf stunned, wide eyed and covering his ears in surprise.
Nevertheless, he had become enamored by you in those very first moments. From your wide eyed look to the unique ways your face scrunched up when nervous. He was drawn to you like bees to honey. Of all the humans he had met, you were his favorite.
From that day onward the both of you lived in bliss and joy for a good 4 years. Your heart couldn't be happier. You had met some of his family, and he taught you many things about the world around you. Including elven customs, you couldn't wait for him to propose. He gave you every possible hint to indicate his intentions. And even spoke of a future together. You were sure of it that he'd ask you soon.
Or so you truly thought....
That day you would never forget. Even now at 80 years of age it was a day that was burned in to your memory like a hot poker.
"Y/N...? We must speak urgently. I have news I must share with you." Aegnor had spoken in a hushed tone, his face uncharacteristically sullen and serious. It was unlike your precious elf to look so downcast.
"Y/N, I have to leave. My people need me and I am unable to stall my departure any longer. I must leave at sunrise." Aegnor looked like he was holding something back as he spoke. But you did not question him.
"Aegnor, why did you only tell me this now? Last minute? How long will you be gone for?" Worry seeped in to your normally bright speech. Every possible alarm in your head began to go off. Something wasn't right. Aegnor's face betrayed but a tiny bit of his inner turmoil yet he managed to school his face in to his usual smile. That smile had made every one of your defenses drop each time.
"I will return to you soon melda. Do not worry....remember this; for as long as I exist, I will love you." Aegnor pressed a kiss to your lips and held you close. Little did you know it would be the last time you'd see him. For a long long time...
The next morning you woke up alone. No trace of Aegnor. Gone. Every item you had of his had vanished like snow under the sun. Except for the silver ring you wore on your finger. An elvish courting custom. Your heart froze in your chest and your breath stilled. The silence of the house was deafening. It almost seemed like even the birds had ceased to chirp. And no wind blew through the trees. He was gone, and with him all the warmth of the world you had known.
The day you died was the same kind of day as when Aegnor had left. It had been cloudy with a summer thunderstorm brewing on the horizon. A heavy wind set over the landscape, making many things difficult. But it didn't matter to you anymore. You were asleep in the cold damp arms of the earth.
Many ages passed and grass, greenery and flowers had grown over your grave. Wiping it away from the lands of Beleriand. And no other called Y/N came forth again from those lands. Until one day in valinor an elven maiden was born to a royal house, and they named the girl Y/N in common tongue. But to those in valinor she was known as Nísimë; fragrant maiden. Because she had brought the beauty and fragrance of a thousand flowering fields in to the royal court with her spirit.
As you grew into full stature, you were often found among the flowers and rivers. Something made you feel safe there. A reminder of what once was perhaps. And today again you sat in the blossoming fields of valinor, weaving a flower crown. Unaware of a certain golden haired elf observing you from behind. Aegnor had been reborn in valinor recently. Returning from Mandos a little later than his brother Angrod. And for his first day he had chosen to take a stroll through the fields, not wanting to spend time among his people just yet.
And there he found you. At first he thought his mind played tricks on him. Because there in the field he saw with his own eyes, a fair elven maiden that looked so much like you it made his heart hurt. The truth was that he had never forgotten you. He had remained faithful all his life. Never wedding anyone else. Aegnor stood frozen on the spot, twisting at the silver ring on his finger. Whose other half you had worn in Beleriand long ago. Before he realized what he was doing, he approached you. His eyes misty with feelings and memories from what once was.
And if he had needed more confirmation that it was truly you, your deafening screech had cemented that in for him nicely. "Just like back then...she hasn't changed..." Aegnor smiled warmly as he muttered to himself. This time he wasn't caught off guard. But instead sat beside you. Introducing himself once more.
You didn't know what it was about him, but he felt like home. Like the warmth of the first rays of sun on a spring day. And you knew then that your heart had loved him once before. In a time now long past. And you were given another chance by Eru. To mend what was broken and to restore and rebuild this love into something more beautiful than it had been before.
"For as long as I exist, I will love you..."