This morning I got out of bed and I went to something that meant something to me. The UCM Out of the Darkness Community Walk is sponsored by the AFSP. There, I got the chance to pick beads. These honor beads represent different things, but the ones I picked mark me as a survivor. The blue represents my support for the cause, the teal for the friends and family that have struggled, who have made an attempt but are still with me. The green represents my struggle. It was less than five years ago that I was harming myself. And I still think about it. But today I felt like I wasn’t alone. So many green beads. I met some lovely women today. One wore white beads. She’d lost her sons. The woman who started this campus event lost her husband and I got to exchange words with her also. I hugged her and thanked her for being there. I made some great connections and I don’t even know their names. I just knew I wasn’t alone. I look forward to the walk next fall.
