I would snog Alpheus because hot damn, marry Alastor because you know he's going to protect you when shit gets real, and I would kill Alma because I'm not having her getting jealous over her brother paying attention to me. Your turn!
“Okay have to agree, snog Creepy Carrow because he is hot- yanno in an undead kind of way, and I’d marry his sister, because she’s the one with an actual brain between the two of them. But clearly you didn’t see what happened when shit got real with Alice, because Alastor basically ghosted her, so that’s enough for me to say kill him, even though he is so much better looking than either of the Carrows.”