so nice being here- so close yet so far. Where I used to run around as a kid (and teen and young adult) now just limited to this small space-- a nice but also alien thing implanted on this landscape-- the exact spot where I lived one summer, and down past the corn field I cant even see the barn anymore because it collapsed. Down through the field my grandparents ' house and the barn where my horses lived and where 2 were born.... just empty now and ruined pieces--
And that house also lovely, transformed, but still alien and not the cozy place where I stayed as a kid many many days and had fresh corn at that old table and
I cant even walk down there now without an invitation from my aunt and uncle
They dont even know I'm here (they are working after all)
And grandma doesn't even have any idea ahe used to live on this property 11 years ago before Grandpa died