A while back, I've realized I'm into the D/s, bdsm lifestyle but I'm extremely confused on whether I'd be a sub or a dom. I know I would love being tied up and controlled but I also know I would like to be in control sometimes (not complete control though) and then be controlled at the last minute (a battle for dominance so to say.) So I really don't know if I'd be a sub or a dom, I did look over that quiz you referred another to but since I actually haven't had sex I couldn't (1/2?)
I couldn't properly answer anything. I also know, at least from what I've read/researched, that not many doms like to be demanded stuff from their subs and like to be in total control during intercourse. I might be wring but basically I'm just wondering if what I described is something that appeals to certain doms and/or if my classification (of myself) as a sub is correct? (2/2)
What it sounds like to me is that you're a switch. Congrats! Welcome to a fantastic group that allows you to enjoy both sides of the control coin- Doing the controlling, and being controlled.
Being a switch is confusing. I'll be the first to tell you that, because I'm one as well, and sometimes it isn't the easiest walk in the park. Switches have the dubious pleasure of being able to enjoy both, depending on the mood they're in or the company they keep. I was a sub in the relationship I have with my girlfriend for quiet a while, but after some things were hashed out my tendencies flopped to the Dom side. Obviously, I'm still one now, but around certain people my submissive side will flare up. I promise, it's not as terrible as it sounds.
Also, don't worry too much about the first part. Everybody is different, and you'll find someone to enjoy that particular desire with. I keep stressing this point, I know, but seriously. Communication is the greatest part of BDSM, and I think you might be surprised at just how accepting people are. When it comes down to it, work with your partner to make something like that a reality.
Hope this has helped!
