#alois ask

[lady-byleth]

Felix and Alois supports would be like: Alois: So two guards are taking care of some food stealing dogs. Felix: I don't care. Alois: And another guy came by and asked "WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?" *starts dancing* Felix: ...

Alois: so there were some thieves who got seen stealing bread. The ensuing chase eas pan-demonium

Felix: *draws sword* where are the thieves

Alois: no, Felix, it's just--

Felix: WHERE DID THEY GO?!

[lady-byleth]

Byleth is interupted while fishing once. She’s off in her own world and a hand is suddenly on her shoulder. Mercenary instincts kick in and she flips said person straight into the pond. After a second Alois pops up out the water and is like “THAT WAS IMPRESSIVE! SHOW ME AGAIN”

*facepalm* I'm almost mad that this is 100% in character because why on the Goddess's green earth would you startle a famous mercenary like that, Alois?! 😂

[lady-byleth]

Also nobody told me that Mercedes and Alois have an ending together? They both wind up at the church and she helps him get over his fear of ghosts and they become lifelong friends? That’s adorable?

Awwwww Mercedes using her powers of ghost stories for good! That's cute!

[lady-byleth]

Someone: *flirts with Byleth* Alois, with lens flare eyes: *big brother mode activated*

Alois: if you hurt my baby sibling I might have to...crush you...ya know, because you're crushing on...nevermind

[lady-byleth]

Just got Alois' A support and uh. Was NO ONE gonna tell me all of Alois' punny jokes are Captain Jeralts? Like, was I just supposed to find out Jeralt gave him a book of terrible puns on my own? Mkay. (Hdkdh but seriously why don't I see more content of Jeralt telling bad dad jokes 😭)

Let's be real, it's much better seeing it than being told about it, isn't it? 😂

The best thing is probably that Jeralt of all people could sell these jokes while Alois is so bad that Dimitri has to pretend to laugh so morale doesn't drop in their supports

But yeah, I wish there was more Jeralt making shitty dad jokes and Byleth absolutely not reacting but he knows she thinks they're hilarious 😍 😭

[lady-byleth]

Claude and byleth gave to make hilda and Leonie godmother because they would fistfight for the right to their children. Lorenz is hoping for another child so he can be god father but byleth really didn't like being pregnant first time around and alois has dibs on a his father position

For my chaos children headcanon, I actually have a little something about this already *clears throat*

Leonie insists she's the aunt and gives Hilda the godmother position because Byleth is "basically her sister" anyway

Hilda Valentine Goneril is the most attentive and doting godmother ever and Alois is the most weepy uncle ever while Lorenz and Seteth are actually the ones who get into glaring matches over who gets to be godfather

Byleth meanwhile tells them to just work it out among themselves, she didn't like being pregnant the first time and the second wasn't any better so a third kid? Hell nah!

Hilda is supremely disappointed she didn't get to be around pregnant Byleth and dote on her too because in my headcanon, Byleth and Claude both establish a democracy in their countries and then disappear on a journey around the world for a few years until they randomly come back with a two toddlers and make Hilda faint on the spot

Ignatz just wants to draw a family portrait pls

[lady-byleth]

auntie flayn and grandpa seteth take the kids on regular fishing trip without alois. there is a separate annual fishing trip dedicated to hanging out with uncle alois vecause if they brought him every time they'd never catch shit

Auntie Flayn and Grandpa Seteth's fishing trips actually are about fishing and relaxing together.

The trips with Alois mutate into camping and survival training more often than not, they never catch shit and the girl has to hunt for them so they have something to eat and cuz her brother and Alois are both useless with a bow she basically takes charge. They all love those trips. Mom and dad are not allowed to ever learn about that time they got chased by a bear.

[lady-byleth]

It’s a travesty that Bernadetta and Alois have an A support but no paired ending. Let him adopt her!

She deserves it!