"The joy of friendship cannot be located in its ideal. It does not materialize when the only thing being met is our own need for other people's attention. It does not transpire when we project our feelings and our unresolved conflicts onto our friends, or simply believe that the reason we know them so well is because they are so much like ourselves. The lasting joy of friendship is a by-product of giving, of gifting our attention. It is an experience of dissolving our barriers and occurs only when we succeed in broadening our own horizons and escaping the prison of our own problems and fears that we are so often trapped in. It materializes when we recognize the person in front of us in their otherness. When we open ourselves up to their emotional reality, to their alternative view of the world. It emerges when we are there for someone else."
Daniel Schreiber, Alone: On Different Ways of Living (2025), translated by Ben Fergusson