Jan 10, 2018
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I think I'm coming down with something, which probably goes some way to explaining today's shaky mental state, but also I haven't been myself since last Friday, when we got the news that a coworker's wife (who had been struggling with depression and alcoholism for years) took a bad fall during the night and passed away. The funeral is on Sunday so we'll see how that goes...
It hasn't been a bad couple of weeks overall, but I've been so tired... By the time I get home from work and the kid's been put to bed, my energy levels are so low that I can't do anything else for the rest of the night except lie on the couch and watch telly. I'm trying to do what I know is the sensible thing and not push myself to do more and just wait till it gets better, but it's been weeks now and I'm getting really frustrated about it.
Today I happened to mention to a colleague that I'd watched Rent (the movie, not the actual musical) for the first time two weeks ago and couldn't stop listening to the soundtrack, and I was fully expecting him to go "the what now?" because Rent isn't at all well-known in my country but instead he went "are you kidding, my wife and me have been fans half our lives, we saw the musical in London back when we were 18, I think I still know all the songs by heart" and I was all "whaaaa?" (not to mention jealous at hell) and then we rambled about it to each other for half an hour on Skype, so that was a nice thing that happened :)
Kid was scheduled to come home from hospital today (after his surgery), only it now turns out he can't come home yet after all because he's started throwing up so the IV needs to go back in, tests need to be run, etc. I'm trying not to be overly worried but it's... a challenge.
I dunno if anyone’s interested in reading Disco fic from me, but I’m about 4000 words into this Stamets gen story and loving these characters more with every word
There. 😊
The thing is, I know I'll never have a great voice no matter how hard I work on it. Like, I'm sure I can still improve by working on my technique, but there are certain limitations that are just *me* and that I'm gonna have to live with. Like the timbre of my voice, which happens to be bog-ordinary. Plus the fact that I'm an alto (or contralto? I know there's a distinction in English but I'm not sure what it is) with a relatively limited range, meaning that the only types of songs I can sing well tend to be ones sung by tenors, which... okay, there's plenty of stuff that fits that mold, but it also gets on my nerve that I'm a girl and yet I can never (or almost never) just sing a girl song, y'know? The song I was practicing yesterday was Out Tonight (from Rent, the musical) and while I *can* do it, technically, it just... doesn't sound all that great because my voice isn't nearly strong enough in the higher registers and it's just, blegh. :///