american psycho where everything is the same except that patrick bateman is a self-hating trans man. he indulges in misogyny and bigotry to fit in and appear more masculine. he fears romantic connections with luis, paul, or tim because he's scared it makes him more feminine automatically. he lives in fear of being outed yet yearns to be understood. the call to his lawyer is simultaneously a confession and a coming out.
only thing i think would actually change is the amount of sex. maybe evelyn knows, maybe she doesn't. maybe courtney knows and its why he's also afraid of and angry at luis being in love with him because he thinks luis loves him because he's trans or because patrick is "inherently more feminine" due to being trans. maybe no one knows, and his sex life extends to mostly sadistic acts with sex workers.
I would think that light yagami and patrick bateman would get together perfect due to several similarities with their personality and criminal backgrounds, but that's the problem
A/N: heavily based off of this cuz I think it was a nice idea for a dream
I don't remember falling asleep. I don't think I'm awake. I'm in darkness. There's an umbrella of light two meters away, illuminating one of my black Barcelona chairs. She moves from the shadows toward me like an exotic big cat. Her hand takes mine without permission and leads me to the chair. I sit down—I'm in the spotlight.
She's preying on me. She circles me, tying me down with nothing but my own will. I don't resist, I don't know why. I cease to exist here. This is her room.
A room of torture, sensuality, and power. I shift in my seat as I realise our likeness. I could leave if I wanted to; there is nothing holding me back but it feels like home here. So... warm...
The lightbulb works overtime to heat like a malfunctioning sun. She watches me, her gaze burning my skin. Siren's become a constant in my life, she's entwined herself into my routines and kissed my solitude goodbye. Even when she's not here, her soul remains and haunts me through the night.
I don't know how long I've been here. It could be between fifteen minutes and five hours. Surely the night would be over by now. She hasn't said a word, staring at me like I'm a new fish in her tank, though I must be quite old, I'm not yet boring. Her favourite...
Or maybe I'm her mirror. She eyes us so intensely because we are reflective of each other. She doesn't express disgust, contempt or hate... It's something more positive, though while it should be wrong, it feels right.
My skin prickles uncomfortably, almost painfully from the flush of heat and a mixture of other things. Lust, even anger. Fear comes and goes in waves. It's absent as I see her eyes light up—literally—a newfound heat towering over me from behind. I lean my head back to see a fire rising. I close my eyes and groan, my sweat pumping out of me as I give up and give myself to her.
Her voice whispers unintelligible words and it surrounds us in time with the fire. I'm within her circle—her grasp—it's agony but she must feel the same way.
Only she can make hell so close to heaven.
I wake with a deep inhale, opening my eyes to near darkness. My body is tense in all places, especially in that particular area. It's unsettling.
I don't know how much of that dream was true, but I've learned not to trust anything my mind conjures.
There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me: only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable. I simply am not there.