Seven thousand miles, for what?
I told Alan that I would meet him at smokers after school, so I headed there straight after English. “Hey Kay, feeling any better?” he said once I got there and give me a weak smile. I turned around to see if anyone I knew was around “I’d really rather not talk about it here if that's okay?” He nodded “wanna go for a walk then?”He said while gestured over to the road.
Once we got a few blocks away from the school I opened up to him, I told him everything, from the shit about Austin, to the scars under my sleeves. Surprisingly it didn’t feel awkward at all, I felt like I could be myself with him and didn’t have to put on some fake act. I looked up at Alan once I had told him everything and noticed a sadness in his eyes “whats wrong?” I asked while nudging his shoulder a bit “Well....it makes me a little sad that someone as amazing as you feels so bad that they have to do that to themselves.” He looked over at me and without any warning pulled me into his arms “Things will get better okay, Kayla? I promise you they will” once he said those few words I could tell he actually cared about me, and that's something I never really had before. I rested my head on his chest and nodded “I hope you’re right Alan....i really do” I said while trying to hold back a few tears. He pulled my face up so I was looking at him straight in the eyes “I know it’s hard to see Kayla, but it will be one day” as he said it his eyes never left mine, and all I could do was look at him and nod.
We walked around for a bit more and stopped a random park in the middle of town; no one was there so it was just two teenagers playing around on the swings. I looked over at him and smiled, everything about that kid made me smile, the way his hair flipped at the ends, the way his beanies looked, his smile, his laugh, and voice, he was perfect. Before I realized what I was doing I rolled up my sleeve and started scratching at my cuts, Alan looked over at me and gave me the sternest look I have ever gotten “Kayla, you can’t do that or else they won’t heal!” he walked over to me and softened his face a bit “Do you mind if I take a look at them?” I shook my head and showed him the three cuts I had done the night before. Alan got on his knees in front of me to get a better look and ran his fingers over top of them, and the old scars “I am so sorry, Kayla” “why is that?” I asked “Because you don’t deserve this...you don’t deserve to be in so much pain, you deserve the world and all the beauty it has to offer” I looked down at him and tried to stop the tears from escaping my eyes “They hurt Alan...a lot...” before I could stop him Alan placed his lips on my wrist and kissed all the scars and cuts upon it. “There....now maybe they won’t hurt as much” He got up off his knees and wiped the tears from my eyes “Now! On a lighter note you are not swinging high enough! Want me to push you?” he asked as he brushed the sand of his pants “What kind of question is that Ashby?” I said with a smirk on my face “Of course I do!”