Jul 24, 2021
what's double fucked up is i don't want to. i don't want to break up with you. he does. i mean, i do, but i don't. do you know what i'm saying? i don't even know who's talking right now.
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what's double fucked up is i don't want to. i don't want to break up with you. he does. i mean, i do, but i don't. do you know what i'm saying? i don't even know who's talking right now.
im a bad person who is faking having problems and oh god im just doing it again but i can't help it!!!! i don't know how to stop !!!!!
god how badly i would like to *** right now
gay <3
oh no.
my past is so ugly. i'm so sorry to anybody who has to hear it.
i know what i need to do but i. don't know how. i don't want to hurt him again but he doesn't even know anything about me. he's made some image in his mind of the kind of person i am and just. it's not real. it isn't real. he's never asked me how i am, or listened when i talked about anything i'm interested in. any time i talk about anything i'm into, he changes the topic without any regard for what i was saying. and i just take it. i just get quiet and let him ramble. and i don't know what to do. i did the right thing and then immediately walked backwards because i was afraid of actually healing anything. and i can't believe i'm going to have to break his heart twice for me to learn my fucking lesson.
how long before you even consider asking if i'm doing okay.