Ann + Des
Ann and Des Margetson adopted my family many years ago, and we lived more brightly, smartly, and deeply for being their people. We were buoyed up by their caretaking, guidance, art, music, and love. They were with us for all the big stuff – birthdays, graduations, weddings, anniversaries – but also during an abounding index of everyday moments. I learned from them the importance of paying attention to all of it – the resinous bouquets of old books, the best music to play while cooking, snack curation for a long bus ride, the intimacy of twice-told anecdotes, the joy of re-use instead of buying new, shuffling off the poor attitudes of people who don’t understand your vision, attention to learning, and learning to marvel. Des cleaved off from this turn around the sun in May 2008, and Ann left us this past April (2014). I still picture Ann painting in her studio off the kitchen in Oak Bluffs, and conferring with me on hushed, car-warm rides home from the skating rink. I still picture Des smoking his pipe while reading in their flat in Morningside Heights, and reminding me to deserve the finish line of major accomplishment. Our families’ friendship has long stretched time and spanned generations, and I’m grateful for the enduring connection with Ann and Des’ extraordinary granddaughter, Arlen, forever soul sister to my sister Kira. I know that Ann and Des belonged to many. They had wide circles of folks who adored and were inspired by them in New York and on Martha’s Vineyard. But they always made me feel they were mine, all mine, as they focused so intently and loved so generously. Thanks to them, I will always delight in the emotional and intellectual shorthand of my people when I find them.
https://www.flickr.com/photos/robynamanda/sets/72157646396167821
http://mvgazette.com/obituaries/2008/06/20/desmond-w-margetson-was-engineer-inventor-athlete http://mvgazette.com/obituaries/2014/05/28/ann-margetson-was-artist-and-activist