How do i know if I’ve moved on?
Well that's a big question. I'll be honest, I still don't know what it means to move on. But I'm not going to bullshit you and say the same recycled "you just know it when it happens" crap. I think moving on is less about forgetting and more about accepting. You were here, I loved you once, thanks for stopping by my house in your journey of life. I still think about the first boy who broke my heart from time to time, but it feels more like a fact, a memory than grief. Even though at that moment it felt like my heart was torn from my chest, now I can sit back and accept that I was young, naive, and it was for the better because I learned something from it. I recently went through a breakup as well, and in my particular instance moving on was a very disturbing process. I was alternating between heartbreak and heartlessness. I spent the days laughing and smiling around and still cried at night like the world has ended. Moving on wasn't this dramatic big moment for me, I didn't have this huge eye opening realisation. I was just in my kitchen, making tea when I thought "I don't want to go back. Even if they come back, I don't want to get back with them. The person I am now is not the one that used to love them." The world ended and it was okay. The tea tasted just fine.
On some days I still think about what could have been, but I don't unblock, I don't text, I don't call. I've outgrown the version of myself who used to beg. And honestly, I like the person I've become after they left. In my opinion, moving on is about realising you no longer need them in your life, and sticking to it. Have faith in yourself. Maybe the silence that haunts you now is the peace you were once searching for.