“Okay…! All the votes are in! Let’s see who the winner is! I’m so excited…!”
“.....”
I wait for the shifting lights to settle before I take a good look.
No one saw fit to vote for me after all.
“..........”
“It looks like today’s winner is… Yuki Kurokame! Congratulations!”
“And the majority vote iiiis…”
“...”
“......”
“.....”
“Correct!! Yuki was the killer! I’m so proud of all of you…!”
“No... You can’t...”
“I hope you all enjoy the execution...!”
“You can’t...! I had to save my family...! I still have to...”
“Might not work out too well now, ahaha!”
“Ooh, unless you can do that as a ghost?!”
I’m sure Tsunyasha would have something to say about that in any other circumstances.
“.......”
If I hadn’t broken her.
“I’m not dead yet... We can fight... right? Mahavir?”
“I... Why me...?”
“Probably ‘cause you have the gun!”
“Oh.” Indeed I do. But what good is it against a robot? I’ve no idea where I’d need to aim.
“Um, Doppler...”
“...”
Whatever I was trying to ask slips from my mind before I can form more words. The trial room dims again. My skin feels tight, and my tongue prickles. I...
I... won’t be saving anyone here. Whether or not I ought to... is no matter. I don’t believe I could hold the gun up again... let alone aim it—at what part of Monochaperone I can’t even be sure. There aren’t many others available to hand off the weapon to. Kogamino and Tsunyasha... aren’t. Tokino and Kurokame I wouldn’t trust. Yuukei... doesn’t seem keen on letting Kurokame go. Doppler couldn’t handle any recoil in his condition. And I... can’t...
“.............”
The air feels too thin to sustain me as I struggle to remain upright. Kurokame cries out, I believe, but if there are words I cant make any sense of them.
“.....................”
Should I be... trying harder? I’m sure I could push away the haze, for... for just a moment, if I...
“.....................”
...It’s no good. I’m... too weak. Haah... Strong enough to be the bully, but not strong enough... to stop an unjust execution?
What was the point of becoming strong... if it was going to turn out like this? Is it inevitable? Or did I willingly take the wrong turns myself?
“...............”
If I think about it any longer, my head is likely to burst. I fear it’s close enough to doing so already.
I pry my eyes open and attempt to blink away the static. It doesn’t work terribly well. I’m not certain what’s happening beyond the small space directly around me. The room doesn’t seem to have an excess of noise or movement anymore. That, or my senses are farther gone than I thought.
I register the shift in the digital display before me. Only tangentially aware of what it means right now, I watch.
Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#26)
I end up hanging around long enough for some interested people to finish their breakfasts, but then it’s off to the races. I end up in a group with Ichiriki, Kaichi, and Aidan to raid the library and game room.
“....”
Maybe it’s easier to ignore what happened in here with so many people around. Or maybe it’s because I have something else to focus on. Maybe both. Doesn’t really matter when I won’t be coming back here for days.
Either way, I pick out a decent selection of books, and then we’re off to the next room. Aidan directs us to the few single-player board and card games available, though I guess we’re free to do something multiplayer if we get three to five people gathered in somebody’s room. Or something like that. I’m a little hazy on the details already, but no point asking if I’m not planning to host anything. About three of the games in here I’ve actually heard of, and they’re not my favorite of all time, so. No reason to get anyone’s hopes up.
We meet back up with the other group, mix and match again as needed, and gather up what laundry we have for one last wash. All very exciting. Lunch basically ends up being a whole other meeting, primarily over what food should be easiest to prepare in advance, how many of us can fit in the kitchen in the morning, et cetera. I can certainly see why we were given the rest of the day to get things in order before starting our lockdown. You never really realize how many things involve leaving your room until you can’t.
A lot like not being able to leave the school... But anyway. We’re working on that.
Afternoon is more laundry, followed by divvying up supplies from the Nurse’s Office and Kokoro’s study hall. Feels like this would be a lot more efficient with someone besides Yuki handling things. I soon find out that still beats the “efficiency” of three people having to chase a six-foot-whatever Ichiriki around as he insists on giving everyone drawing paper for some reason.
Every day’s an adventure.
The next time we meet to switch up groups, I end up throwing a pool tournament into our suggestion box for sports-whatever. May not be sporty enough for everyone, but at least you can play fine with a limp. And then...
“Kogamino? May I have a moment?”
“Ah? Sure.”
At least he's been doing better today than yesterday, but that’s not a high bar to clear.
“Were you still wanting to investigate Kishaba’s room?”
“If you need lifting strength, Yuukei would make a good choice for a third person. Ah, though I suppose we need four now?”
“Right...” I’d kind of forgotten about that, to be honest. But today’s as good a day as any, right? Mahavir sure won’t feel helpful locked up in his room all day, so might as well get one more ego boost in while we have the chance?
“Yo, did I hear my name?”
“Ah, yes. We were going to look through Kishaba’s room...”
“...”
“We don’t have to.”
“...I’m quite all right.”
“Like, aight. I’m always good to hang out.”
“Should I bring Kaich in case there’s more math?”
“Probably a good plan.”
That makes four. All nice and neat and good enough for me.
We have to wait a bit since Kanagi and Kaichi are still talking sports, but that just gives Mahavir time to rest a little. I hope.
Either way, we manage to group up and head out before anyone else can steal our team members for their own ends.
I unlock the door without trouble, and we head inside.
“Just tell me where I’m needed.”
“Right.”
“I’ll start over here. Feel free to poke around wherever else you want.”
I don’t know where I’m looking on account of not knowing what I’m looking for, but I at least claim Itsurou’s desk. Mahavir drifts off towards the wardrobe. Kanagi and Kaichi seem content to sit on the foot of the bed and strike up a riveting conversation about sand.
And so I start digging through a dead man’s stuff for lack of any better ideas.
Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#28)
Once our little break is over, everyone gathers to go to the gym.
Or actually, stop by the cafeteria first to grab a few supplies, and then to the gym. I end up getting volunteered to carry one of the little round tables. What kind of sports are we doing with these?
“...”
Moving on.
Kanagi has already made it to the top of the still-collapsed bleachers seconds after the rest of us step inside. She waves us down.
“You can set ‘em up wherever, dudes! We got three, right?”
“As far as I can tell.”
After a minute’s wandering, we set up the tables at vaguely regular intervals. Kanagi goes around giving them a kick—to make sure they don’t collapse, I guess??—but doesn’t pull up any chairs or anything else before returning to the bleachers.
“All right, dudes! We’re gonna kick this thing off with some arm wrestling!”
“Yaaaay!”
How are you excited? Your arms are freaking toothpicks.
“We’ve already determined our first matches! We’ll still go one at a time so we can all cheer each other on, but! If you’d like to wait at your tables!”
I don’t remember signing up for this. But three tables means two of us aren’t going, right?
...Betting Aidan’s one of them.
“Arright! At Table 1...”
“...whichever one that is...”
“...we’ve got Ich versus Yuks!”
“Okay...”
“Yay~”
The F-tier arm-wrestling league, I see. At least they’re trying to keep the first round fair. Ichiriki and Yuki head off for the closest table to get situated. Which is a sport of its own at at a low table too large to reach across easily, with no chairs.
“And then Table 2 isssss Kaich versus Kakumi!”
“Is it, now.”
“Nice.”
Kaichi heads for the table closest to the arbitrarily designated Table 1. I don’t have sufficient grounds to object, so I go over, too.
“And me and Iggy for Table 3!”
“Why is Kogamino the only one you don’t have to nickname?”
“Cuz she’s, like, kinda a butt about it.”
“And Mahavir isn’t?”
Well, whatever. Maybe she has trouble with foreign names. Or maybe she... just does whatever. I’m not here to try to figure her out.
“Oh... So Tsunyasha doesn’t get to play...?”
“A wise choice.”
“Any of you sinners attempting to make physical contact with the Holy Assassin... Well, it would only serve to burn you terribly.”
“Like, actually I was hoping you’d help Aid set up the next game?”
“You think—”
“Cool, thanks, dude!”
“I—excuse me?”
Did Kanagi just win the random-off? Steep competition, too.
“All right!! We’ll begin with Table 1! Mister Tokino, Miss Kurokame, please prepare to face off!”
Yuki gives Ichiriki a very slow yet fairly shallow bow.
“I’m sorry... if I’m not very good competition.”
“That’s okay!! I have no idea what I’m doing!”
“Like... You do know how you’re supposed to stand ‘n’ stuff at least, right?”
“Nope!”
“Hummmm... I think it’s like this...?”
Wow, no idea why this duo wasn’t chosen for the climactic final battle.
With Kanagi’s intervention, they manage to get set up, though.
“And—Go!”
It either takes them a minute to respond to the command, or they just can’t exert enough force to make a visible difference.
“Who am I supposed to root for again?”
“I usu’lly go with whoever’s winning.”
“Thanks.”
“Go go go go!”
“I’m trying...”
“This is fun!”
“It seems like an even match! Who will emerge victorious?”
I said no color commentary, but go off I guess.
It’s significantly more interesting to watch Tsunyasha bringing out tennis balls rather than the actual competition, but eventually we have a winner.
“Hahaha! I lost.”
“It was close, hummmm...”
“Nnnnnice.” I think she’s trying to wake up again. “Good job, Yuks!”
“Ohhh, is it Table 2′s turn now?!”
“Yup! You dudes ready?”
“ ‘S born ready, brah.”
“You do actually know what you’re supposed to be doing, right?”
“Oh, I never know what ‘m doing.”
He puts an elbow on the table and leans in. I stare for a minute.
“What, y’ bugging out ‘cause y’ get t’ hold a cute guy’s hand?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Gooooo, Kakumi!”
“Oh, right... we’re supposed to be cheering.”
“Um, go... everyone...?”
Weirdest sports day I’ve ever had.
I’ll get booed off the face of the planet if I don’t start soon, so I settle in and wait for Aidan’s countdown. Then the pressure is on. Literally. Kaichi may be a skinny guy, but what body mass he does have seems to be muscle.
I put in a passable effort, but it’s still over in a few more seconds. At least I offered enough resistance to keep my knuckles from getting crushed into the tabletop.
“Good game, brah.”
“Yeah...”
And once I’m out, I’m not paying attention to the rest. Guess I’m not a good spectator, but I don’t think any of us know who we’re supposed to be cheering for. It’s just weird to take sides for something like this. Or maybe it’s just me. I’ve never been that big on the whole sports scene.
For some reason, Yuki versus Kaichi is next—two guesses who wins that one—and then Kanagi versus Mahavir. Whether Mahavir would have won in better condition or not I’ll never know, but Kanagi sweeps it. And Kaichi’s no competition for her.
Not much of a tournament, huh? Probably comes with the territory when only one person in the class got invited as a Super High School Level athlete. Then again, that may not be a foregone conclusion. I’m pretty sure it’d be even less of a competition if Otoya was here.
“.......”
I’m not sure what hit me just now. Probably grief? Doesn’t quite sting enough. Guilt? Maybe. ...Wistfulness? I don’t know. It’s still too hard to untangle the emotions. The best description I can put together is just a sort of dull throb in my head.
I... miss him, I guess. Odd thing to say about someone I barely ever saw, but. You don’t have to hang out all the time to be friends.
“W-we’re… fr-fr-friends, r-right?”
"......”
Before the fourth case, I hadn’t really had to deal with this kind of loss. Kazusuke? Not even close to friends. Mary Jane? Same. Kokoro? Probably close, but we just didn’t have time to get to know each other. Aidan... betrayed me, I guess? At least, that was the easiest way to think about it. And...
...he’s also alive now, so not a great time to be thinking about his loss.
But then Arthur, Itsurou... still pretty neutral. And if we’re talking about betrayals...
“...”
I can’t even feel bad about sending her to the chair. Even if it seemed like we were basically friends, it was all a lie. Maybe she did care for me, but she sure wasn’t the person I cared for. She acted like someone else had done her harm instead of her doing the harm herself.
I hate people playing the victim. It just makes it harder for real victims to...
“Yo, brah?”
I jolt and find myself in the gym. Good to know I didn’t wander out.
“What?”
“You’re playing, right? Even if ‘s not really teams, might ‘s well keep ‘m even, yeah?”
“Uh...”
What are we doing now? Something with tennis balls that isn’t a team sport but vaguely is? That... What kind of inference can I make from that?
Is this what it’s like to be Kaichi? Horrifying.
“Uh, yeah, just give me a sec.”
“No prob.”
With that, I retie some laces that didn’t really need it and head to the side of the gym with fewer people lined up.
Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#21)
The rest of the day is a blur. Some pool. Some Centipede. Some vapid conversations I barely remember as I’m having them. A cooking lesson that’s more lecture on Japanese sauces than actual cooking.
I don’t run into Aidan again. I’m not sure if I want to. Certainly I’m not going to try anything now, but... I don’t know. I don’t know.
I end up in the sauna dangerously late in the day. The only exit is to the bathhouse, which closes at nighttime... Would I be stuck in here overnight if I stayed too long? Punished? I bet I could stay awake. Wonder what happens in the restricted rooms at night. Cleanup and restocking or something. Maybe I should try staying in the kitchen. Eat some coffee beans straight up to keep from falling asleep and see how the heck Monochap sneaks in and out of there.
But for now, I’m just...
“...”
It is kind of pleasant in here. I may be bundled up a bit too much for a sauna, but it’s supposed to be hot anyway, right? As long as I swig plenty of water after this, I should be fine.
“...”
“After this” might need to be “right now,” actually. No use getting too light-headed. Or, well, I don’t mind having fewer thoughts, but I probably shouldn’t be taking health risks. I can worry about nighttime escapades later. I should... attempt to get some sleep.
After a cold shower. I don’t think I’ll be needing a warm bath after this.
...
"Um, hello! Good morning! It is now 7:00, so the off-limits areas have been reopened! I-I hope you all have a nice day…!"
I wake up again. That’s always good.
But when I make my way towards the cafeteria...
“Sounds like some kind of ruckus going on.”
I open the doors, but...
“.....”
No people, less noise. Uh.
I back up into the hallway and try next door. The gym. Sounds like maybe the hubbub is in here instead? Did I miss a summons to an early morning sports tournament?
Is someone...
“........”
No, that has too be too many voices. Right? If someone had been discovered, the jingle would have played...
“......”
It still takes me a minute to open the door.
People are still talking over each other, but I don’t see any bodies on the floor or fists flying.
Knives, maybe. But not fists.
A thud rattles the still-collapsed bleachers behind Kaichi’s shoulder. In true Kaichi fashion, he hardly flinches.
“Woooooow!”
“I’m next, right? I’m next?!”
“No way, dude!”
“That’s right! No one is going next!”
“What?! Nono I’m next!”
“Wh...”
“This is a completely unnecessary risk! Cease at once!”
“Risk? Surely you don’t mean to question my skill.”
“Seems pretty skilled t’ me.”
“.............”
I always manage to forget I should worry much less about these people dying than just being idiots.
Before anyone can notice I’ve joined them, the knife digging into the stands slowly tilts, then falls. Kaichi manages to pull his foot to one side before the blade clatters to the floor.
“Haha, whoopsie! You okay?”
“Looks like I still got—” he tilts his head down to check—”ten toes, s’. Yeah, sure.”
“That—”
“That makes it clear how dangerous this is!”
“Like, nothing happened, though?”
“That was a matter of luck!”
“Fool! You think any part of this is merely a throw of the dice? No divine weapon of mine will harm anyone unless I bid it.”
“Considering how consistently you threaten everyone, I don’t find that comforting!”
“So, anyway, it’s totally my turn, right?”
“It’s no one’s turn!!!”
I walk inside just as he’s about to blow a gasket. The door falling shut behind me is enough to get a little attention.
“I would ask what’s going on, but I think I have a good enough idea.”
“Ah, Kogamino!”
“If you understand, would you mind talking them out of it?”
“I’m afraid I’m having little luck.”
Another thud interrupts before I can say a word. Ichiriki starts laughing.
“Woooow, that one was super close! Ahahaha!”
Standing stiffly, Kaichi cranes his neck just enough to get a good glimpse of the knife now separating his face from his surfboard.
“Nice.”
“There.”
“Now the next wretch may step up.”
“I’m the next wretch!!”
It’s surprisingly hard to jump in and stop something when you can’t fathom why they started in the first place. Are we seriously that bored? Didn’t we just wake up? At least eat before you start throwing crap at each other, geez.
“Nuh-uh! I’m next!”
“How did this even start?”
“Well, like, Yuks was gonna make omelettes this morning? So we all kinda ordered ‘em or whatevs, and, like...”
“...”
“Amid the conversation as we waited, that one saw fit to issue a challenge.”
“I did?”
“And then things happened, and now we’re here!”
He finishes, as if he’s being the most helpful one here.
“I had been assisting with the cooking when I realized everyone had left, so I peeked out to see what had happened...”
“And you were met with a fun surprise, huh.”
“Yeah-huh! It’s super fun!”
“That’s great.”
“Actually, I just came over to see who got the first omelette? Because it’s finished.”
“Ah, first should have been... Riseiin, I believe?”
“Nice. ’m out, then. Later, brahs.”
“I don’t think the rest are far behind, so if you’d like your food warm, you can come back to this later.”
“I suppose that may be for the best...”
“Consider it a mercy to those of you bound to time, hmm?”
And just like that, the party dissembles to go for the door. Tsunyasha walks—like a normal human being—over to the stands to retrieve her mystical-whatever knives. Mahavir stays back, presumably to make sure she doesn’t kill me while we’re still here.
...I really hope Yuki’s almost finished. Maybe I don’t need to follow everyone over all that quickly.
Tsunyasha gets all her knives put away in quick order, but we’re still the last ones out. Mahavir, as usual, spares me from having to open the door.
As we cross into the hallway, I see Monochap opening the doors to the dorm area. Before I can wonder what he’s up to now, Aidan wheels himself out, with an uttered sound that I don’t think is actually a thanks. Upon seeing us, Monochap gives a little wave and a disturbing giggle before fleeing towards the Main Hall.
Aidan seems a little more pleased to see us.
“Good morning! I hope I haven’t missed anything?”
“Nothing worth mentioning.”
“...”
“Has Monochap been opening doors for you?”
The handicap buttons in this place haven’t been working since we woke up here. I hadn’t spared them a second thought, but now we actually have someone in a wheelchair. Guess that’s how it usually goes.
“When necessary.”
“Unfortunately, my student ID was reset to its original settings before they gave it back to me. But whoever did that also added an option to signal Mister Monochaperone for assistance.”
“It isn’t my favorite recourse, and I’m not sure why it’s necessary when it isn’t that difficult to summon him otherwise, but it can be useful.”
“Ah, to have a demon at your beck and call.”
“Quite fitting for a black-hearted sinner like yourself, hmm?”
“Don’t you start this again...!”
Aidan holds up a hand.
“Calm down, Mister Attenborough.”
“Miss Tsunyasha, I appreciate saving your comments for a more private discussion, but I’m afraid they are still highly inappropriate.”
“You’re entitled to your opinion of me, but I fail to see how repeating it does you any good. I cannot take back what I’ve done, so I would prefer to focus on what I can do at the moment, if possible.”
“Oh? Is this a sorely misguided plea for mercy, worm? You think I must gain something from this?”
“It is merely my job to ensure those of your corrupted ilk cannot walk away from their sins freely.”
He’s not doing much walking at the moment, in case you haven’t noticed.
“You call this walking away freely?!”
“Mister Attenborough.”
“.......”
Aidan turns back to Tsunyasha.
“Whether it’s sufficient for your tastes or not, I assure you I have most certainly been punished.”
“I can’t ask you to approve of my sins, as it were, but if you truly care about doing the right thing, your priority should be ensuring the safety of the other people here.”
I only see a flash before there’s a knife at Aidan’s neck.
“Then I should eliminate you now, yes?”
Aidan stares evenly back at her.
“Do you really consider me such a threat? I am incapable of physical combat, I am unarmed, and I would have severe difficulty engineering anything to kill another in this state. No one here has anything to gain from my death.” His gaze strains towards the knife. “This is nothing but a very rude gesture, and I would like you to stop now.”
“Oh? You still think I would follow a worm’s orders?”
“Why don’t you follow this?!”
Mahavir lunges at her. Aidan winces as the knife skirts along his jaw. Tsunyasha hops back an extra pace, and Mahavir tilts dangerously before catching himself on the wall. Huffing, he doesn’t seem able to push himself back up too quickly. I put myself between Tsunyasha and Aidan for good measure.
“So you’re relying on your little guard dogs, are you, whelp? You truly think they’re any match for a Holy Assassin?”
“I’m not a guard dog, you just need to stop?”
“I am not trying to rely on any physical enforcement here—” a pointed look at Mahavir—“nor am I giving you orders. I am merely pointing out that there is much more to being ‘righteous’ than harassing those you deem to be sinners.”
“So you question my judgment, worm?”
Your judgment is nothing if not questionable.
“More like questioning your ‘righteousness,’ or ‘holiness,’ or whatever else you’d like to call it!”
He finally shifts his weight back onto his feet.
“Regardless of who did and didn’t die, at least Doppler has done everything he can to help us!”
“What have you EVER done for anyone else here?!”
“Stir up trouble, mostly.”
“Hmph. Only just now I was providing you ungrateful whelps with entertainment, was I not?”
“And no one died, if I must remind you of that.”
“As a fluke! You easily could have injured Riseiin! It was only a matter of luck that he didn’t have any toes sliced clean off! And I shouldn’t need to tell you even foot injuries have the potential to be lethal!”
“...What did I miss here?”
“We can worry about that later.”
“The potential, certainly.”
“But a far less sure shot than firing a gun into someone’s chest, hmm?”
“But that wasn’t for amusement!”
“And yet it still happened.”
“I truly don’t understand how you could possibly favor that sinner’s actions, but I suppose your wicked ways are just that far beneath me.”
“It’s because you don’t understand that you’re the only threat here!”
“Oh, I’m quite a threat to those who would dare try taint my holy name. Would you like a demonstration, whelp?”
“No one would like any demonstrations!!”
“Of course you wouldn’t.”
“We get your freaking point, okay? You could stab a serious burn victim and a wheelchair-bound child to death with ease if you really wanted to. Congratulations.”
“You want to prove you’re such a great assassin, how about you wait until practically anyone here is in decent physical condition? You’ve held out this long. I’m sure you can handle a little longer. Or is patience suddenly not one of your holy virtues?”
“Hmph.”
“Don’t think for a moment you can understand the essence of a Holy Assassin, fool.”
“Oh, believe me, I don’t.”
She spins the knife once around the gloved part of her finger and sheaths it.
“Very well. I tire of these pitiful negotiations of yours.”
“I’ve a reward waiting for me, anyway.”
She takes a few steps towards the cafeteria.
“Use this opportunity to think about what awaits you.”
Not an omelette on my end, I’m guessing.
“Any more of this and I assure you, whatever awaits you won’t be a reward.”
“Mahavir. That’s enough.”
“........”
Mahavir stares Tsunyasha down as she walks away. Even when the doors close behind her, he doesn’t turn away.
“......”
I hear a rattle and open my eyes again. Aidan’s started to wheel himself forward.
“Miss Kogamino. Thank you for stepping in.”
“No problem.”
“...”
“I’m halfway surprised you’re not upset about being called a child.”
“Well I don’t appreciate it, but I can understand it was for emphasis.”
“Right.”
He scoots himself closer to Mahavir.
“....................”
“Mister Attenborough?”
“.........”
“...I’m sorry. But she...”
“She can’t just...!”
“I know. She has no right to be making these sorts of threats, but pushing back like that will. Not. Help with her.”
“...........”
“So take a deep breath and come on. We have a meeting to get to.”
“........”
Aidan moves as close to the doors as he can, but Mahavir doesn’t follow yet. Guess it’s not that easy to let it go.
But everyone else is already in the cafeteria, right? No harm leaving him alone to cool down a bit.
I don’t want to think about what could happen if he ran into Tsunyasha again too soon.
Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#15)
Cool, got my socializing done for, like, the month. I’ll just grab my lunch and chill.
The best part about bento is taking it wherever the heck I want. Have a little quiet in the safety of my own room.
Wouldn’t mind a little music, actually, but my phone and crap’s been missing from the start, so. All I’ve got is the electroID, and it sure didn’t have a music app last time I checked.
I pull it out anyway, just for the heck of it.
“Yeah, nothing.”
Guess I could try the auditorium. I’m sure there’s some soundtrack somewhere that I wouldn’t mind listening to. Doesn’t seem worth the effort today, though.
I toss my ID on my bed instead of fussing with pockets, then open up my bento. As I fish the chopsticks out from their careful placement, I hear the faintest high-pitched whinge. Takes me a minute to realize it’s from the television coming on.
“Um, hello, everyone...! I hope you’re having a nice day!”
“Nope.”
Shockingly, he doesn’t respond to that.
“It seems there might be a problem with the school rules, so, um...! I’ll be updating them now! Please be sure to check them, okay? Th-thanks!”
The transmission shuts off. I gaze over at my ID where it lies cockeyed on the bed. It has to chime before I actually drag myself over there to look.
Doesn’t seem like any of the existing rules got reworded. But...
“......”
Relevant evidence, huh. That’s what I got for my efforts? Monochap really doesn’t want us going back in the art room, does he? But a change is a change. Hopefully the next killer realizes what this means.
Or hopefully they don’t? If they try that same trick, then I could go back in the art room during investigation and...
“...”
...I hate assuming there’ll be another killer.
Whatever. Let’s just eat my lunch before I lose my appetite.
...
All right. Guess I should do something else. Is it too early to take a bath and go to bed?
“Probably.”
Maybe I’ll just... go find a book or something.
“..........”
Maybe something from Itsurou’s room.
I clap the lid onto the bento and drum my nails on top of it. Kind of a nice sound.
Much more peaceful than the sudden cacophony of banging on my door.
“!”
I try not to jump, but the knocking’s so aggressive I halfway think someone found another dead body.
“I’m coming, I’m coming!”
I hurry over, and...
“..........”
It’s just a door...
“Yo! Kakumi!! You in there or what?”
Ah. Well, the insistence might not mean anything dire is going on after all.
I finally open the door to see Kanagi. Thankfully her next knock stops shy of pummeling me in the face.
“Oh! You are in there.”
“Yeah.”
“So, like, are you... good?”
“Good?”
“You totes didn’t show up for breakfast.”
“Oh. Right.”
“Just seemed like a good day to sleep in.”
“Did I miss anything?”
“Yeah!”
“So I was s’posed to come ask if you have the... uh...”
“Ellipse-y thing?”
“The what.”
“The...”
“Ugh! Why would he send me to use big words?!”
“Your guess is as good as mine.”
“Okay, just, like...”
“Can you play video games and not die?”
“..........”
“Was ‘epilepsy’ the word you were looking for?”
“Y’know, I don’t even remember, dude.”
“...”
“But, uh, no, I would be fine.”
“You said ‘he’...?”
“There’s gonna be, like, some kinda tournament? Can’t remember what the game was...”
“But it sounded like you get to beat stuff up, so that’s good enough for me!”
“That’s how video games tend to work, yes.”
“So you’re in, right?!”
“Uh... Probably?”
“Awesome! I’ll go let ‘em know.”
“See you tonight, dude!”
With that, she turns to leave.
“Tonight? The tournament is? When—”
...She’s already gone.
“...........”
Okay. Well. I either show up or I don’t. There’s not much question of where, at least, so hopefully I’ll run into somebody who knows the when before it’s time.
“What I wouldn’t give to have some fricking texting in here.”
Oh, well. That’s what I get for missing the morning meeting. I’ll figure it out.
Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#10)
I throw my dishes in the sink and dig up the smallest sack of flour I can find. Heading back to the cafeteria table, I thunk the bag down to free my hands.
“...” This is still weird, but too late to turn back now.
“Hey, Aidan.”
He was already staring at me, for plenty good reason.
“Yes?”
“Let me see your room key.”
“I can let you in myself if you like?”
“No, just the key, please.”
I hold out my hand.
“...”
He looks between me and the sack a few times before digging through his breast pocket and setting a key on the table.
“Please don’t blow up my room.”
“...” I’d say that’s quite a conclusion to jump to, but hoping I can get fingerprints to prove he’s not a robot or evil twin doesn’t sound much better, actually.
I nod and carefully pick up the key by the edges before scooting along to the hallway. The door shuts quietly behind me.
I look down at the key in my hand.
So. Where am I getting all the prints? The key should have his current set, at least, considering he literally just touched it. It’s the older prints that are tricky. Any of them in his room could have been left recently, so checking there won’t do me much good.
Somewhere he only would have been earlier, then. So, it’d have to be the first or second floor. Don’t think he’s ever come in my room. And most of the common areas will have so many prints I couldn’t hope to find a particular person’s. So somewhere less popular, but somewhere he’s still been...
“...”
I circle around to the gym and nudge open the door to the electrical room. He messed with fuses in here, took wires, managed stuff to crappily announce that basketball game...
...that Arthur started...
But. There haven’t been any other events to bring people in here, and this stuff hasn’t been used for any murders recently.
God, that shouldn’t have to be a consideration. Anyway.
I go around shuffling flour out of the bag onto the soundboard and blowing it away. A few prints kind of show up, but I don’t feel like I’m using the best method here. Should've brought tape, at least. Whatever. It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.
I zip next door to the equipment storage. There should be tape here, but I’m not sure if any of it is clear.
I nearly run straight into someone.
“Sorry!”
At least she sidesteps me with ease.
“Oh, you needn’t worry, worm.”
“It is much more difficult than that to leave a mark on the Holy Assassin.”
“Right...”
I frown at the equipment cart she’s standing in front of.
“What are you doing in here?”
“Perusing the supplies.”
“Of course, most of these are quite lacking as instruments of assassination, but they may yet have some use.”
“As murder weapons?” She’s already thinking about this again? Guess she never stops.
“I would hardly suggest anything so vile as murder.”
But assassination is fine.
“But these could still function for those ‘games’ you mortals so like to occupy your limited time with, yes?”
She picks up a rubbery ball and prods at it experimentally.
“A dodgeball?”
“Ah, yes, that’s what you fools call it. It could work well as minimal training, yes?”
“Considering almost half of us are seriously injured? Don’t think it’d go well.”
“Hmph.”
“Then what are you here for, pray tell?”
“Oh, uh. Just looking around.”
The last thing I want to do is vent my concerns to Tsunyasha. She probably thinks the current Aidan is a demon or something. Which wouldn’t fare well for him, but... Can’t convince her otherwise if I haven’t convinced myself who he is yet.
I look back to her.
“How do you have no fingerprints again?”
“How? I suggest you not ask questions whose answers you will never understand.”
“So it’s some... holy thing?”
“Yes.”
“Right...”
Don’t think I’m getting anything useful out of her. Don’t think I’m getting any tape out of here, either. It was a long shot.
I say goodbye and retreat to the electrical room. No one suddenly here. That’s always nice.
I wait for Tsunyasha to head out, hunt down some clear tape in the student store, and get back to work. I doubt I’m doing this right, but... if this is all a trick by the young master, I can’t leave these unguarded for long. I’m pretty sure Itsurou’s study hall should have all kinds of books on fingerprints, though... Oh well.
After a series of exciting tape-trying-to-stick-to-itself-and-ruin-everything mishaps, I get the floury prints onto some of the Apex Academy posters where I can see them. Prints from the soundboard on one end and prints from the key on the other. And...
“I feel like I’m missing 80% of the detail on these.”
As far as I can tell, they match up, though. The right overall patterns, arranged appropriately for his left hand.
“Oh, actually...”
I run the poster to the lab and boot up a microscope. Not sure how much time I waste trying to orient myself to the thing, but at least I can try to get a closer look. Not that it’s easy trying to jump back and forth across the poster. I do think they match, though?
I can always double-check later. Just make sure I hold onto the poster for safekeeping.
I go throw it in my room before remembering Aidan’s without his key still.
“Right. Should probably give that back.”
To the cafeteria. The rest of the not-crowd has switched out by now, but Aidan’s still at the same table. He scoots back a bit as I walk up.
“Miss Kogamino! Did you find what you were looking for?”
“Yeah, thanks. Here you go.”
I slide the key over. He just watches it for a minute.
“Right, I should look into that, too...”
“Hm?”
“Oh, er...”
“You’ll know when it’s ready, don’t worry.”
“...............”
“Well, see you.”
“See you.”
Okay, then. Back to my room for real.
“...........”
Guess I’ll just hang out for a while. Go to bed early, maybe. Can’t see much reason not to. I might not actually sleep, but... Not doing anything else, so I don’t see how it makes a difference.
“.......”
So... That really is Aidan, probably. Somehow. Which means what? Does it make him suspicious? We never saw the votes, so the whole thing could have been rigged easily. The execution could have been fake, the injuries could be fake.
But is that really something he would do? Seems awfully ludicrous, but this whole thing is pretty ludicrous.
I flop onto my bed with a sigh.
I can investigate all I want, but in the end, I just don’t know what to think anymore.
Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#5a)
I approach Aidan. Don’t particularly want to talk. To anyone, let alone him. But it feels wrong to just ignore him, after everything that’s happened. And I still don’t really know what’s happening now...
Whatever. Here I am, anyway.
“Hey.”
“Good afternoon, Miss Kogamino!”
“Is this your first time on this floor?”
“Why, do I look lost?”
“A little bit.”
“Seems like you’ve gotten your bearings.”
“Something like that!”
“It’s... a lot.”
“Especially the, uh, dying part, but I’m sure it’ll all settle in eventually.”
“...”
“Anyway! There’s nothing up here inherently dangerous enough to warrant special warning! So feel free to explore at your leisure with a normal amount of caution!”
“I could offer to guide you, but it appears you have that covered.”
He nods at Yuki and Ichiriki.
“Yeah.”
I’m great at talking today.
“Right, then.”
“You were the last one I needed to relay that information to, so I believe I’ll go back downstairs if it’s all the same to you.”
“Sure.”
He watches me for a second before wheeling himself away. One-handed, back and forth. It’s awkward to watch. Was I supposed to push him? Or was he trying to gauge something else?
Whatever. I can’t be bothered to help if I’m not even asked. Not right now.
