Henny ranks Eurovision 2023 - before the show
i’m kinda late with this this year, i admit. reasons? I guess I can say i’ve been busy, but it’s not all, truth is i’m not that engaged about this year actually... of course there are songs i love, but it’s not a year where i struggle to make a top 10 you know? anyway. enough negativity. let’s take a look, shall we? oh and please not that the songs are not in a certain order within each category.
category: can’t we have two winners please?
Sweden - yeah i’m in my patriotic era again. this is euphoria chapter two, in a good way, and it’d be so cool if she won purely from a statistic point of view... howEVER........
Finland - wouldn’t it just be great with a winner that was... a little rough around the edges? dirty, gritty, would scare your grandma only to later make her nod and say it’s quite a bop afterall? and it’d be the proper reward for finland who has brought their absolut a-game to their national final for the past few years - even though they’ve in my opinion picked the wrong winner from it. until this year that is. yeah, i think i’d like that.
category: added to my playlist and played frequently
Norway - mgp really stepped up their game as well this year and sometimes i even question if queen of kings is my winner from it (there’s tresko, ekko inni meg, love you in a dream etc etc) but my god it just goes so hard doesn’t it? although WHEN are they putting the version with the intro on spotify?? WHEN!!
Slovenia - you know sometimes i forget carpe diem is a eurovision entry because it just sounds like something i’d hear from an average band in my library?? idk how else to describe it. i just love it. and i love THEM. bojan’s charisma is.... sigh
Austria - it bops and it’s so CLEVER i love it
Serbia - hello??? i’m obsessed
Portugal - as soon as the beat kicked in on my first listen i was hooked. it’s flawless. and it’s the first portugese entry i’ve been really engaged in since.... uh... i started watching?? obviously i’ve liked entries from them but i haven’t really cared. this time i do.
Czechia - go ladies go!! i really hope this will be as epic on stage as in the mv. please please please
Malta - this is a sort of recent obsession, i didn’t really get it right after the nf, so we’ll see how long this lasts but i’m always having fun listening to it
category: also in my playlist but not as frequent
Estonia - it’s beautiful! but maybe not so original. my winner of eesti laul was meelik /:
Switzerland - i actually don’t mind the lyrics and i love the chord intervals in the chorus
Croatia - chaotic fun. and sticks to your brain like glue. mamaaaa kupila traktora... SC!
United Kingdom - this song was like a bubble gum. lovely and fun the first few listens but i got tired of it kinda quickly, sadly
category: i can recognize the talent here but i guess it’s just not for me?
Latvia - i’ve seen so many people hyping this and everytime i listen it’s like yeah this is good! and then i don’t feel the urge to listen again
Spain - yeah the performance was captivating but... that’s where it ends for me
Italy - it’s nothing Wrong with the song itself but it didn’t grab me and i had so many other options from sanremo i’d rather see here than Another Male Italian Ballad and this time by a returning artist on top of it so uhhhh yeah
France - i’ve listened to la zarra before the contest so i had some hopes for her and they were not fulfilled )): i like the disco beat and the last chorus - because that’s when everything finally reaches a fullness it should have reached WAY earlier in the song. do you feel me?
Moldova - you know i think i just need a few more listens to this and i’ll get around to it
Ukraine - don’t have much to say about it but it’s alright!
Georgia - this is that kind of song that you only hear in eurovision but when you do you absolutely love it and she does have very impressive vocals, i gotta say
category: they’re fine i guess/i don’t care!!!!!!/no that’s definitely not for me
Belgium - song is kinda catchy i’m ngl. but i cannnnnNOT cope with his styling.
Azerbaijan - it’s cute! that’s about it
Albania - i’ve listened to this exactly once and it was alright but nothing core shaking you know?
Netherlands - this one i think is alright everytime i hear it and then i immediately forget how it goes after it’s done. i couldn’t sing it back to you know matter how i tried honestly
Denmark - yeah it’s fine
Cyprus - i don’t caaaare i don’t care it’s alright but i don’t caaare
Lithuania - ehhhhh why couldn’t we have had beatrich instead ):
Germany - i guess i see why people like it but yeah no this is Not my thing at all
Australia - same with this
Armenia - this could go in the other category above here but.. i don’t like it enough actually
Iceland - yeah no. i don’t get it
Greece - for the love of god couldn’t someone have paired him up with an experienced songwriter and/or producer here because there are many great ideas but they just sound like a mess? it sounds so unfinished?? and i think i really would’ve liked this if it just sounded more... polished. worked on.
Israel - again a mess of a song with too many ideas in it and a very weird build. can’t get around to it
category: good god no
Ireland - someone asked an ai to write the most generic song ever and this is what we got
Romania - dude. bro. no.
Poland - this could’ve been a very basic but somewhat ok entry had there just not been the whole story with how it was picked and what kind of person she is
San Marino - this song feels like a threat. and WHAT is with the singer’s posture?? STAND UP STRAIGHT jesus christ
and there we have it! how much do we agree?
