Nothing Has To Change~ A Valentine's Day Scene
Happy late valentine's day! Tried to post this yesterday and it did not work.
From the world of Second Chance: Kaitlyn (Russell's sister!) is with the God of Knowledge, who is in hiding... and she might be in love with the god.
Second Chance Taglist (though this is a little... away from the canon story) (Ask to be +/-, but just fyi I'm not sure if this is an active WIP😅)
@puzzleddragon02
@blind-the-winds
POV: Kaitlyn “Look at the baskets!” Ardi squeals, rushing forward to a stand with baskets of candy, fake flowers, and small stuffed animals. They instantly engage into a conversation with the seller, I’m sure telling them the history of gift baskets on Valentine’s day. I would follow them, but I see that Buttercup has sat down, which makes Netalia hang back. Of course, there’s probably peanuts in the gift baskets. I know Netaila hates having to be left behind, so I hang back with her, flashing a smile to Ardi when they glance back at me. Ardi knows why we’re hanging back, says something to the seller, then takes a basket and returns to us. I’m sure Ardi already knows the peanut-status of the basket, but they hold it to Buttercup to sniff anyway. Safe, Buttercup wags her tail and circles back to Netalia. “They’re crocheted!” Ardi points at a small bear holding a heart. “And look, homemade white raspberry fudge— they make it all at home and…” Ardi goes on to give us small facts about the making of it, more than the creator likely had time to relay to Ardi. Not that Netalia notices. “So cute!” Netalia takes the little bear, rubbing her fingers against the side of its face before handing it back. We go to this farmer’s market almost every week— it’s indoors in the winter, outdoors in the summer— but since it’s the weekend before valentine’s day, it’s much more saturated with hearts— hearts and crafts, I think, which I’m sure is an unoriginal pun but I decide to say it anyway. “So much more hearts and crafts this week,” I say. Netalia gives me a very exaggerated eyeroll, but Ardi giggles. “Hearts and crafts!” they say. Even though they could likely tell me exactly how many times that pun has been made before. “Yeah, usually there’s only 3 or 4 craft booths, today it’s forty—“ Ardi adjusts, “forty percent, probably.” They were probably going to say the exact percentage, which makes me smile. “It’s a good present-buying occasion.”
“Not when you’re single,” Netalia says, handing the bear back. Ardi puts it in the basket again. Ardi bounds back to the table, and Netalia turns to me. “You should buy them something.” She’s got a sneaky grin on her face. That flusters me a little bit. I run my hand through mt hair, pushing my curls out of my face. “What… are you talking about…” I can’t help but smile— I’m not hiding it from Net. Netalia’s called me out on my maybe-crush before. “Come on.” Netalia grins, then turns to the closest table, a jewelry stand. The jeweler greets us with a warm smile. She pokes at the various stones on chains. “I thought you hated Valentine’s day,” I said. “I can root for you guys. You gotta make a move. Would Addie like earrings?” Netalia asks, using the fake name Ardi came up with for college. I smile in memory— in the first year, Ardi asked if they could borrow some earrings. When Ardi had manifested this form, it hadn’t had pierced ears, which I’d pointed out, leading to Ardi to grin. “Magic trick!” they’d said, tugging their earlobes and making holes appear. I was pretty sure they’d stayed since. “Maybe,” I said, looking at the options. But they all seemed too… elegant, glitzy. I wandered down the table. The necklaces were more understated, but still, it didn’t seem right. “They don’t have a watch, right?” Netalia suggested. I shook my head. Ardi knew the time on their own.
“I don’t know if I should,” I said. “Why not?” Netalia asked. But Ardi had returned, suddenly behind me. I was suddenly afraid they had heard me, and could only hope they hadn’t heard enough that they would wonder what we were talking about, thus instantly knowing. Ardi didn’t comment on it or make any expression, but that wasn’t necessarily an indication. They leaned over my shoulder, pointing at a bracelet with a stone with a blue rim and a blue dot in the center. “So many cultures believed that people could curse others by giving them an ‘evil eye.’” They informed us. “And some think only certain people can bestow the curse. And for some it’s only blue-eyes people who can. This jewelry’s supposed to reflect it off them, but that’s why it’s usually blue.” The jeweler has come closer as Ardi spoke, her face lighting up at the history. “The blue-eyed thing is from the Mediterranean,” she said. “Light eyes are rarer there.” “Yep, especially Turkey!” Ardi adds excitedly. The two of them start a conversation about the history of evil eyes. I watch and listen and Netalia comes up next to me. “So, think evil eye is a good one?” she asks quietly, picking up the bracelet. I shake my head. Just because they’ve started an info-dump on it doesn’t mean it’s the best present. “It’s too loaded,” I say, staring at the chains of necklaces again, watching them glitter. “An evil eye?” Netalia chuckles. “Okay, I see your point.” “No… to give anything. On Valentine’s day.” “Nah, friends give Valentines gifts all the time. Just steer away from hearts if you don’t want to be suggestive.” Netalia grins. “Or do!”
I spot a lotus flower necklace. Not too fancy, simple and cute. And Ardi loves symbolism— they know all of the associations, and are fascinated, saying that it’s such a purely human thing to make those connections. I don’t remember what the lotus symbolizes off the top of my head— all I remember is that I know Ardi said it once, and I remember thinking it was very them. But what I can’t tell Netalia is tht it’s not just shyness or fear of it being unrequited. Ardi’s not a person, as much as they seem to be, as much as they try to be. I so often see Ardi as who their disguise is… as human. Not as the god of knowledge. You can’t just… fall in love with a god. Have a relationship with one. And even if Ardi denies it, they are a god, they will one day have to return and I know that. And they know that, they have to. My parents, my friends from before… they all didn’t understand my relationship with Ardi. Said that I couldn’t think myself as equal to a god, couldn’t question them or expect them to meet me halfway or even be special to them. Gods belonged to all. Some people had a more direct connection, where there to help carry out their duties, that’s all I was to Ardi, that’s what they said. But when I look at Ardi, I don’t see a god. Even when I can tell that they’re brimming with facts, that it’s all they can help not to let the collective knowledge come pouring out, faster than human speech can be. Don’t mistake your loyalty to your god for a partnership, Mom had said. And I always had to push back against that… trust Ardi, that we were partners. Given that, why even try to start a romantic relationship? In a way, it already felt like we had a deeper… but different, partnership. We were definitely connected already, in a strong way.
A romantic relationship almost seemed… Cheaper, less strong, less deep. But I couldn’t deny wanting it. I couldn’t deny wanting more, wanting the things that seemed almost too human for a god, like holding hands and kisses and dates and soft hugs and yes, possibly sex— like, how could I even consider asking for that from a god? A god who had trusted me to be the only person to know where and who they were? A god I’d already given up so much for and knew that I would never feel like they owed me— because wasn’t that inherently the power imbalance of a god and their servant? If I truely saw us as equal, why was I willing to be the only one to sacrifice things? I was already special, already Their Person in a way. But also… Would Ardi want a relationship? Yes— but that was the problem. A relationship was one of those unique-to-humans experiences that I’m sure Ardi would want to try. Which is… not what I wanted. I knew too much. I couldn’t trust that this wasn’t just them trying out an experience. To try out love and romance and relationships. Not that I thought Ardi’s expereinces were unreal, but I didn’t want them to agree simply because they wanted to try the activity or experience. More than that, even if I could stand that… I knew that they had to return. That a day would come where they were no longer any level of human… back to being Ardisci, God of Knowledge. And no matter what, when they did, I still wanted to be right by their side. In our current relationship nothing would change. But if we were a couple, and they decided to return? They would have to give me up, give up the romance things, the relationship, no matter how real those feelings turned out. I fully expect Ardi to know about my feelings. Not that they know inner feelings, but if they’ve learned anything on how to read that kind of thing, and I haven’t exactly denied it in conversations with Netalia.
Ardi’s finished the conversations about evil eyes, and Netalia suggests they go over to a booth of soaps and candles. Netalia winks at me as they leave, Ardi too distracted to notice that I linger. It doesn’t matter what I want. As much as I see us as equals, I still am their loyal servant, committed to their will. So I’m not going to say anything. But I can still get them a present. I buy the lotus necklace and slip it into my pocket. They may already know I bought it. They may know why. But I can give them the necklace without it meaning anything and keep not saying it, and things will stay how they are.
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I have another scene from Ardi's POV here if you want more of these characters
