#aristotlemendozza

[irisannwest]

share some happy moments u and john have had i need fluff

oh my god

um

apparently i enunciate words kinda funny. like, for potato/tomato: instead of pronouncing it as: potado/tomado (bc people don’t emphasize the t at the end), i pronounce it as po-tay-to and toe-may-to and he wouldn’t stop teasing me over it but the jokes on him bc a few days ago, at work, he couldn’t stop emphasizing those words at his market each and every time someone goes to his register with potatoes and tomatoes

i can’t pronounce the word heathen at all, despite using it so often (i think i just have trouble pronouncing th’s and what not) and ever since he found out that i can’t pronounce heathen at all, he purposely pulls me up from behind into a bear hug and won’t release me from his grasp until i shout, “unhand me you heathen!”

there was this asian market that was selling really cute (but pricey) rainbow alpacas and i wanted to get one for my sis’ bday (it was yesterday, btw) and just picture the both of us grabbing each and every rainbow alpaca plush and carefully inspecting it for its face/fluffy “fur”/ear symmetry/stitching/glue etc and not being satisfied with it and ending up with the both of us covered in various color of the rainbow bc its fur got all over us (we both wore black shirts that day)

um one time he showed up at my house with a bag full of lychee candy bc he found out my blood sugar problem came back a swinging and he knew the lychee candy would help it

we were kinda bored at disneyland while waiting in one of the rides’ line and so he decided to teach me how to dance (i can’t remember what it was? waltz? idek)

concept: the both of us in his truck, stuck in traffic whilst i unapologetically blast a bunch of shitty pop music for him to listen to

um omg so his mom, for the first few weeks/months of us dating, freaked out and was worried that he was gonna quit college, join the military, marry me, and move out (lmao omfg)

and i always knew that (bc he tells me this stuff)

i just never heard the part where it was his dad who brought these thoughts to her bc he was the one who apparently brought up the fact that we were a lot like them when they were our age??? 

so lmfao at his dad being the one to tell her, “lmao you know what this means right?” when they found out we were dating

lmao there’s more but i’m so tired and my laptop’s gonna die so have fun with these dumb tidbits

[irisannwest]

. Five facts about your current relationship OR Five facts about your single life.

1. we have a date jar where we’re both each supposed to put $5 in there a week so that we will be able to [later on] afford a really expensive “date”.

2. there’s an extreme height difference between us to the point where selfies/photos taken of us would have to be done with me on my tiptoes and him crouching down.

3. we’re both nerds. everyone else thinks he dragged me into nerd hell when it’s the opposite.

4. we’re growing a garden. tomatoes. cucumbers. green beans. basils. and strawberries.

5. he once took me out for a date/adventure thing. we ended up in a cemetery and i still haven’t forgiven his ass for that since. omfg

and 6, bc i have to include this: u and ur sinning ways were what helped bring my bf and me together. lmfao

[irisannwest]

Shout out to @aristotlemendozza Aka the ultimate wingman ever

[irisannwest]

shoutout to @aristotlemendozza

because he’s half a world away, at least over 8,544 miles away, and he managed to be the real MVP?????

[irisannwest]

there’s a special corner in hell just for andre

[irisannwest]

newsflash, andre is evil but what else is new????

[irisannwest]

Andre is the worse and he will make you sin in the worst way possible

[irisannwest]

do not become friends with @aristotlemendozza because all he will do is push u into the life of sinning