I threw this together tonight because I was in a mood for it apparently
Alloromantic Crowley confesses his love to Aromantic Aziraphale. It doesn’t go quite as planned
The thing about Aziraphale was this: he had a single dial with two settings when it came to love. The first setting was unconditional and all encompassing love. The second, slightly to the left, setting was “I am rather not fond of this/them” and that was it.
For Crowley - who’s own dial ranged from ‘burning hatred’ to ‘raging romantic love’ - this was becoming a problem.
“I love you too my dear.” Aziraphale said for the third time, his gaze having become progressively more confused over the course of the, so far relatively short, conversation.
“You’re not lissstening to me!” Crowley hissed, not in an angry way but in a desperate pleading kind of way. “I love you. I love you in the-the ‘I don’t know if I would have been able to go through with stopping the end of the world’ kind of way in the-“
“My dear you really shouldn’t cut yourself short, you were already on your way to Tadfield before I-“
“In the-“ Crowley pushed on, cutting off Aziraphale’s own interruption “-‘I don’t know if this world is worth saving if it doesn’t have you in it’ kind of way’, In the-the-“ He flapped his hands desperately, looking for a word to explain it. Anything to explain it. “In the ‘I would rather be melted in holy water then spend eternity without you-‘“
“Stop cutting me- ugh!” He threw his hands up before burying his face into them once they came back down. “I can’t- I don’t know how else to explain this to you Angel. I Love you! Capital letter and italics included.”
Aziraphale fell silent after that and Crowley kept his head buried in his hands for what felt like hours before finally.
“Well. Well. I-“ Aziraphale started before clearing his throat and trying again. “I also think this world would be quite drab without you in it. The things I love doing would hardly be any fun without someone to share them with and, well, you are my favorite person to share them with.”
“Angel-“ Crowley started desperately once more, glancing up at him from between his fingers just in time to catch Aziraphale holding up a hand to silence him.
“Let me finish me dear.” He insisted softly “I...may not fully understand the love you are talking about, At least not directed at a single Thing, but I think I understand enough.” He cleared his throat as if preparing for a speech and Crowley sat back up, fearing how long this might go on for. “While I do love all of creation I admit to having a greater appreciation for those things which I have physically interacted with. I, oh how do I say this, I love hot cocoa in a general sense, for everything that it is and that it took to become what it is, but I love hot cocoa from the corner store down the block the best because it holds memories for me-”
“I thought you liked it the best because the guy that runs the place always puts a splash of rum in it for you?” Crowley couldn’t help but tease, which got him a wack from Aziraphale but at least it got him smiling again.
“You know what I mean.” Aziraphale went on, the air a little lighter, “and that was not the point anyway. The point is that you are like the cocoa from the corner store-“
“I’ve got rum in me?” He smirked and there came another smack as he tried not to laugh too hard.
“I wouldn’t be surprised.” Aziraphale huffed, crossing his arms and trying -and failing- to look put off, “the point is that while I don’t quite understand the love you are speaking of I still love you. I love all of humanity, every part of them, I love all of this planet and all of creation but Crowley I love you not just because I love everything, but because I know you. I have memories, good and bad, with you and that makes my love for you richer then- then-“ He floundered
“Then the old man that puts rum into your cocoa?”
“Mr. Taylor is a wonderful young man an I will not hear you say otherwise.” He huffed
“Young?! I don’t know if you have noticed lately Angel but the man is pushing eighty by now, it won’t be much longer-“
He was smacked again but the conversation and the night went on and, while Crowley knew he hadn’t quite gotten the response he has been hoping for from the Angel, he figured being compared to his favorite cocoa was good enough. After all, it really was quite the compliment.
