Hellooo
So, I have this problem that quite literally ruins every sexual experience I have. I can't get wet when I'm with someone. Even though I'm excited, really, I just can't seem to get wet. When I'm alone, no problem. I read stuff or imagine it and I'm wet. But when I'm with someone, it's impossible for me. Even with my exes, whom I trusted and loved, I couldn't. I always was fully consenting, I was aroused, nothing to distract us, and yet, nothing. I don't know why this happen because alone I have no problem.
It's really a big problem for me... do you have any explanation?
Hi!
Here's the thing: some people don't get wet at all and some people specifically struggle with getting physically aroused in certain situations, despite feeling aroused.
There's nothing wrong with that. Arousal nonconcordance (which is what its called when you might feel aroused but your body doesn't respond, or vise versa) is actually fairly common and it doesn't mean you can't enjoy sex.
Bodies don't always respond or work in the ways we want them to. It doesn't mean there's something wrong with you; it just means your body isn't a machine and won't always answer directly to your emotions or wishes. Much like people can't always get hard when they want to, even if they're aroused! Or even how it can be roughly time for you to eat something but you're not feeling hungry!
Usually, when the issue is just something like not getting wet when you're aroused, people do things like use more (and/or make sure to use) lube and give your body more time to adjust if it needs it! Work with your body and accommodate yourself!
But obviously, I don't know your whole situation. That's just an explanation and a bit of a tip if you want it. But lemme know if you have any other questions, I hope this helps a little, Anon. <3