CertifiedSexEDposts

(he/it) Exactly what it sounds like! Sex education posts and discussions! Feel free to @ or DM me if you know any posts that should be here.

[certifiedsexed]

This is a Certified Sex ED Blog! My pronouns are he/it.

No, I am not a doctor or a therapist, nor do I have a certificate. Just training (unfinished due to disabilities) and experience.

Minors, DMs (I will rarely respond to those though, sorry!), asks and @'s are 100% welcome, just keep in mind I do not tolerate hate speech. If you want me to answer your ask privately, just add it to your ask! Check out my Before You Ask Post (before you ask!)

Also, I have a No Stupid Questions Rule, ask whatever the fuck you want, no matter how obvious it seems.

(If your question is "genital specific" or you think it might be, please do not tell me you're "AFAB/AMAB" and assume that tells me your genitals. It does not!)

If I ever reblog anything that seems bigoted or by someone bigoted, feel free to let me know (with some explanation, please!)

For those who need them, some of my tags are:

#sex education <- all sex ed in general.

#sex tips <- tips specifically on having sex!

#asexual education <- education on asexuality!

#aromantic education <- education on aromantism!

#trans education <- education on trans-related things!

#intersex education <- education on intersex-related things!

#hormone education <- education on hormones/HRT

#sex work education <- education on sex work!

#kink education <- education on kink!

#consent 101 <- education on consent!

#disability education <- education on disability-specific sex ED!

(Fundraising is tagged #vetted)

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

PSA for transfems, if you are lactating for no apparent reason please check if ANY of your medications have an effect on prolactin levels. lexapro, for instance, can cause lactation on its own.

it drives me up the wall that doctors fail to do basic shit like reviewing your medication and jump right to "we gotta get an MRI". it's probably not a brain tumor.

[realflaminglily]

is. is lactation a symptom of having a brain tumour?

or is this a case of "what some dumbass doctor said it was"

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

a tumor is just flesh that's growing weirdly, a non-cancerous pituitary tumor that produces prolactin is called a prolactinoma. they're extremely rare, my issue here is that doctors will start talking about scheduling MRIs ($$$, huge hassle to you, effort-free for them) to rule it out without doing basic shit like reviewing medications.

[marxistcalvinisthobbesist]

also also if imaging is warranted for new lactating, it would be a mammogram, an ultrasound of the breast or a CT scan (a series of cross sectional X-ray images to make a 3d image) of the chest, to see if theres anything going on in the actual goddamn breast.

trans women are at lower risk to get breast cancer than ciswomen generally, but when we do have it, we're at much much higher risk of it being missed or not treated until too late

a huge principle of medical practice is that it is more likely for a common issue to have a weird symptom or presentation, rather than a rare issue or condition to have its most common symptom show up.

meaning, if you have a weird symptom, its most likely to be a common problem that just has an uncommon symptom, and the common stuff is the stuff docs need to rule out first

[hairasuntouchedaspartoftheamazon]

Hi!!! Not a transfem here but as someone who has the tumor condition described above that raises prolactin levels, I can absolutely describe the exact things that led to my diagnosis and why most people experiencing nipple discharge probably don't have this issue, and the steps that you and your doctor should take!

First off, the tumor I have is called a microedanoma. Its really small, less than 5mm wide, and it's pushing my on pituitary gland, causing it to produce more prolactin.

The way I found this out was through:

Spontaneously developing nipple discharge. Spontaneous is key here! As the posters above have mentioned, if you've recently changed medications, those should absolutely be investigated as a potential cause first. My doctor specifically asked if I'd started any new medications when I went to them with symptoms.

Physical exam. My doctor physically examined my chest, breast tissue, and glans. When they found no lumps, swelling, or anything else to suggest tumors or infection, cancer immediately became far less of a concern. This is an important step. If a doctor tries to send you for an MRI without doing even a cursory physical exam, push back on that immediately. Even if its not cancer, it could be a tumor in your breast tissue.

Blood test. My doctor sent me in for lab work, and my prolactin levels came back elevated while everything else was normal. Again, if your doctor tries to send you for an MRI before doing any blood work, PUSH BACK ON THAT. Bloodwork could also reveal any other issues or rule out certain causes. Mine was straightforward because only prolactin was raised, but if other hormones were present it could have been a lot of different things.

Breast ultrasound. My doctor was pretty sure I'd need an MRI at this point, based on symptoms and blood work, but as a final step I got a breast ultrasound done to definitively rule out cancer or infection. (As a side note, its also far more common for insurance to cover breast ultrasounds/mammograms than MRIs, so this is also a cost saving measure for the patient). No tumors or infections were found.

MRI. With a probable diagnosis and other avenues definitively cleared out (no medication changes, infections, or tumors elsewhere), I finally went in for an actual MRI. It was at this stage they found the microadenoma.

If you're like me and one of the very rare people who actually have this kind of tumor, dont worry! There's medication to both manage symptoms (nipple discharge) and manage tumor size, and they're less than 20 USD for 3 months supply. You will be okay.

If you're not like me, congrats! You don't have a tumor. That means you're likely having a weird symptom for something really common, and you should go down the list of steps described above to figure out the issue. I have a transfem friend who does not share my tumor condition but did experience nipple discharge, turned out she had an infection that wasn't discernible through physical exam but was identified through bloodwork. Bodies are weird!

Advocate for yourself! Do not pay for MRIs if you don't have to! You probably don't have a brain tumor and there's a clear path to check if you do. Your problem is almost certainly straightforward and inexpensive to solve. You got this.

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

PSA for transfems, if you are lactating for no apparent reason please check if ANY of your medications have an effect on prolactin levels. lexapro, for instance, can cause lactation on its own.

it drives me up the wall that doctors fail to do basic shit like reviewing your medication and jump right to "we gotta get an MRI". it's probably not a brain tumor.

[raucous-indignation]

Abnormal nipple discharge requires a thorough evaluation. Breast exam and imaging is indicated. A MRI brain with pituitary protocol may also be indicated. An adverse medication effect is usually a diagnosis of exclusion. Other pathological causes must be ruled out first.

[certifiedsexed]

While it can be good to get a thorough evaluation including an MRI, you can test prolactin levels fairly easily and cheaply through a bloodtest. Its also a fairly common cause of sudden lactation that can be easily found through (like OP mentioned) reviewing medication, testing, adjusting medication and/or asking thorough questions.

And depending on where you live, imaging (especially things like an MRI) can be expensive and hard to schedule. Starting with a cheaper and more common reason behind random lactation is often best.

No one is saying a tumor is impossible or never to get other testing, just that you can save a lot of money (and worry) by checking your medication first.

Also, claiming (in your tags) that most medical professionals are all going through medicine lists first to check these things so you don't have to worry and OP's experience is next to meaningless is gross.

Don't do that shit. Medical malpractice like that is very common, especially for marginalized people and claiming her experiences as well as advice are thoughtless is insensitive AF.

[certifiedsexed]

is there a name for a kink towards metaphorical(?) sexual or erotic imagery? things like that french anti-smoking ad (it shows up if you search that term), things like guns, knives, syringes as phallic imagery, keys in keyholes/plugs in outlets mirroring penetration, that kind of thing?

Well, that sounds kind of like it falls under objectum to me, which is an attraction to objects but there's also probably a specific name for this.

Someone who follows me definitely knows but I don't ngl. (I think I've heard it before, I just don't remember.)

So I'mma post this and hopefully someone can add on with a better answer. Sorry I can't help more. 💞

[thestarsaretrans]

I hate how defenses of transfems often give in to the assumptions of transmisogyny.

Bigot: "But if trans women are allowed in women's sports, they'll win all the time!" -> Liberal: "They've done studies and trans women don't win that much!" -> Giving in to the assumption that transfems winning is bad and unacceptable. We can be there only if we aren't exceptional.

Bigot: "But if a trans woman comes home with me and I find out she has a penis that's basically rape!" -> Liberal: "No trans woman wants to deal with someone else's surprise! That would never happen!" -> Giving in to the assumption that our transness and genitals being unknown is rape-y and wrong.

Because there will be transfems who absolutely dominate their sport. There will be some incredibly anxious avoidant tgirl who doesn't tell her date about her dick until awkwardly late. That's okay. There's nothing inherently dirty or violent or wrong about our bodies or our success, and I'm sick of defenses of us pretending like there is. Like bigots will ever be convinced by the idea that our wrongness is merely contained.

[decompose1]

INTERSEX IS NOT:

- species that all have the same or both genitalia

- species/characters that can change their genitals to be whatever they want at will

- species/characters that change their genitals situationally

- aliens that can reproduce asexually or with anyone from the same species

INTERSEX IS:

- a person/animal/organism/character that is part of a species with two or more distinct sexes (at least within the social constructs of the species), who exists between these binaries (mixed, ambiguous, lacking, or incomplete genitalia, hormone differences, chromosome differences, or differences in/mixed sexual characteristics)

PLEASE for the love of g-d stop calling your alien species that has both genitals or a uniform set of genitals across the species ""intersex"". intersex people are tired of seeing this. it does not accurately describe intersexness at all. you can use the terms "monogenital" (for all members of the species having the same uniform genitalia) or "bigenital" (for all members of the species having both genitals)

[decompose1]

Hey, two things!

1) Intersex people generally prefer that the word "hermaphrodite" stop being used entirely, even in biology. Scientists have been migrating to other words like cosexual, bigenital, etc. because the word "hermaphrodite" is a slur with a lot of pain & violence attached to it. So please don't use that for your species either.

2) Please don't refer to our genitals that way. Intersex people ARE "supposed to be that way", and while some intersex people have genitals that can be considered partially developed, referring to people with ambiguous genitals as if our genitals are Wrong, not supposed to be that way, broadly just a mix of underdeveloped disordered tissue.... it's offensive. Intersexness is natural. It's a natural variation of human sex. What's truly wrong is to assume that the only natural presentations of human sex are "male" and "female". My ambiguous genitals function just fine. I'm going to become a mother. Please don't talk about people like me like that

[certifiedsexed]

ID: A screenshot of tags reading: "speaking in terms of zoology and not human biology here intersex is also separate from hermaphrodites too they both have bits and bobs from multiple sexes so it can get confusing but hermaphrodites are supposed to be that way based on our understanding.

its literally just part of how the species functions for hermphrodites their organs are fully developed and functional too intersex can lead to underdeveloped organs which may not function very well if at all please dont use the term hermaphrodites to describe human people tho since its rude

some animals like barnacles are hermaphrodites too"

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

PSA for transfems, if you are lactating for no apparent reason please check if ANY of your medications have an effect on prolactin levels. lexapro, for instance, can cause lactation on its own.

it drives me up the wall that doctors fail to do basic shit like reviewing your medication and jump right to "we gotta get an MRI". it's probably not a brain tumor.

[certifiedsexed]

are all warts caused by an sti? because i know they are all caused by hpv, which i’ve always thought of as just an sti. how are warts transmitted in other ways, if they are? why are the types of hpv that are sexually transmitted only sexually transmitted? i hope this made sense

Yes. HPV is an STI and all warts are caused by HPV. HPV is generally transmitted through skin-to-skin contact, which is part of what makes it so contagious. It's not bodily fluids, its almost always skin to skin (including contact with things containing enough skin particles).

It's easiest to spread through things like contact with genitalia because they've got mucus membranes which make them more susceptible to spreading and contacting it. But it can spread through other areas as well.

For example, someone with HPV could transmit it to a baby when giving birth. There are some that can spread through reusing someone's used (unwashed) towel that contains enough skin. You can get it from touching someone else's warts! Things like that.

See, a lot of STIs transmit in ways outside of sexually. It's just more common for them to transmit through sexual activity or its more common for it to be dangerous when transmitted through sexual activity.

Its not that they solely transmit sexually. Its usually just easier to transmit infections like that through mucus membranes like the genitals!

Hope this helps a little! Lemme know if you have any other questions or this didn't make sense, though. 💞

[certifiedsexed]

I know there are certain scenarios where I admit that I simply don't know the answer and a doctor might but ngl, I do hate medical professionals with a passion.

I don't think they deserve the amount of respect they generally get in society and the frequent gatekeeping of medical knowledge (that medical professionals often encourage) is frankly evil.

So if you're ever sitting there, feeling shitty about going to the doctor or feeling shitty because you went to the doctor, just know I'm already hating them for you 🫡

[certifiedsexed]

Hello! Hope you're well.

You said in one of your posts that cheating doesn't necessarily make you a bad person. Can you elaborate on how so? I don't quite understand (genuine question)

In my mind, if you're cheating while in monogamous relationship, it seems like a bad thing to do. I guess unless you're stuck in an abusive relationship? Are there any other examples in which cheating is ok do you think?

Hi! Thank you, you too!

Lol, funnily enough, you weren't the only person who wondered this. I don't mind elaborating at all! This isn't really a topic often covered in sex education tbh, which is frankly such a missed opportunity in my opinion.

For anyone who needs the clarity, cheating is kind of a vague term for when you're in a sexual/romantic relationship with someone (or multiple someone's! It doesn't just happen in monogamous relationships!) and get involved sexually/romantically with someone else without an agreement from your partner(s).

Examples of that really depend on the relationship! For example, in some relationships, kissing others on the lips romantically could be cheating while in others, cheating is only actually having sex with someone else or practicing kink with someone outside of the relationship.

But while cheating can cause harm (which could be anything from hurt feelings to financial issues!), it doesn't automatically make someone a bad person.

Your example is a good one, Anon! A lot of people are in abusive or generally shitty relationships, more than people often realize and expecting them to follow some agreement of fidelity when their partner (or partners) are actively hurting them is more than a little shitty and assuming they're a bad person for it is worse.

We also live in a society that pressures people to be monogamous, whether they want to or not, as well as cishet. Not to mention how often people are forced to stay in relationships, regardless of whether they want to or not, because of things like children and financial dependency.

Like, is it always "right"? No but I wouldn't automatically say its bad or makes someone a bad person for doing it. Things are simply far more complicated than that.

Also, someone doing something shitty doesn't make them a bad person!

People do shitty things for all types of reasons (they made a bad decision, they're under a lot of stress, they're high/drunk, they're scared, they're not happy in their relationship, they're not in the type of relationship they want to be in) but it doesn't automatically mean "oh you're a bad person".

It might simply mean "oh you messed up."

I think far too often, people think of their partners like property that belongs to them once they're in a relationship and that perspective can make people react really extremely to cheating tbh (which is funny because I think treating your partner like property often encourages cheating, as opposed to eliminating it).

But I think its important to acknowledge its not something that immediately makes someone evil or bad, it really just depends on the situation and sometimes you can't define everything as bad or good, it's just A Thing That Happened.

Hopefully that makes sense? I know I rambled a lot here but lemme know if you have any other questions or if parts of this didn't make sense. I don't mind elaborating at all if you need it. 💞

[certifiedsexed]

Hello! My partner directed me to this blog to help learn some stuff that might help with some of my personal issues regarding this topic.

I'm pretty new to the blog, so about your asks, is it okay to mention past/previous abuse? I have something to send in, but my past experiences related to the abuse are relevant. I didn't see any initial guidelines about it related to. Nothing too graphic, of course.

Hi! That's kinda dope to hear ngl. Welcome here!

And yes, absolutely! Feel free to send that in, I don't really have guidelines besides "don't be a bigoted dick" and "I am disabled, so I might be slow answering things sometimes".

I get a lot of asks that involve abuse (partially because of how frequent discussions of consent are in relation to sex education, I think) and its chill with me so don't worry. 🫡

[certifiedsexed]

how long should i wait to have sex with/make out with someone after being sick with a cold?

It depends on what you have!

Typically, about a week for a cold (and the flu) is when you're definitely not contagious but generally, if you have a cold and a fever, you can wait until about a day after its gone and as long as your symptoms are improving, the likelihood of you being contagious is fairly low.

With strep, you're contagious for 1-2 days after starting antibiotics and 2-3 weeks if you don't go on antibiotics.

With Covid-19, you should at least wait 10-14 days after you start showing symptoms and make sure you're improving. If you're not sure whether you have a cold or Covid-19, its better to assume Covid-19 than a cold.

(Keep in mind, false negatives are a persistent issue with covid tests, so like...Yeah.)

That said, you can also just discuss it with whoever you're having sex/making out with and see what they're comfortable with, risk-wise.

Its not necessarily recommended (especially since if it's Covid, you do want to wait until you're feeling significantly better so that you don't give yourself long-Covid) but still a possibility.

Hope this helps! Lemme know if you have any other questions. <3

[certifiedsexed]

(Anon has a clitoris)

Is it normal to touch myself as just a stim? I don’t get off, and I never have, but I touch myself as just like. A thing I do. It’s like the same as, say, picking at a scab, or scratching an itch. It feels good, but thats it.

also! Sorry if this is a stupid question, but sometimes I feel some kind of like… pressure in my vaginal area. Like… i’m not sure how to describe it. But it usually happens when I talk/think about my biology or read smut. Is that what being turned on feels like?

Normal doesn't really mean anything tbh. Like, if you mean how common is it, I dunno. I've met plenty of people who stim that way but I'm also autistic and spend a lot of time with folks who stim a lot, so I'm probably not a good judge of that aspect.

There's nothing wrong with it, if that's what you mean, though. It's okay to have stims that involve your genitals, its okay to touch your genitals just because it feels good even if you don't want to orgasm, its your body.

Also, no worries about stupid questions! I have a No Stupid Questions Are Stupid Questions but Even If They Were, I Don't Mind rule, so its perfectly chill.

As for that pressure, it could absolutely be arousal! Or at least a groinal response, which is where your groin, or specifically your genitals, react to sexual thoughts/sights/stimulus or just sexual content even if you personally don't find it super attractive.

Hope this helps a little! Lemme know if you have any other questions, Anon. <3

[certifiedsexed]

I'm a symphorophiliac 🥲

Ngl, that's probably inconvenient AF but you did make me learn a new word so I just think its kinda cool. I'm also really thinking hard on the logistics of this kink and I'm kinda fascinated. 🤔

(For anyone wondering, this is a kink that involves staging or witnessing accidents/disasters!)

[certifiedsexed]

not juneteenth related but on the subject of pride month going rather shittily for me, nvm.

I just met a gay trans girl (who is apparently not at all alone in her opinion) who is dedicated to the forcefem of some youtuber slimersomething. we're so back 😂🥹

[certifiedsexed]

Okay admittedly not watched tooo much but seeing the videos, Charlie is kinda giving Her✨ vibes. I think I need to see some Egg Moments Edits of her fr bc...🤔 the potential is real.

[ihaveanaxe]

I heard “slimersomething” and went “holy shit Slimecicle” then figured that a slime YouTuber would probably make more sense, turns out NO ITS FUCKING SLIMECICLE THIS IS CRAZY CERTIFIED SEX ED KNOWS SLIMECICLE AND IS ACCUSING HIM OF BEING AN EGG IM GOING CRAZYYY

[certifiedsexed]

LMAO ngl, I didn't think anyone would specifically clock who I was talking about but as soon as I posted this, I quickly discovered not only is there a very specific circle on Tumblr rooting for Charlie's egg to crack but quite a number of them follow me

💀 which, like, respect, I just wasn't aware of the diversity of my followers interests lol. maybe I should ask for some game/r recs!

also, I'd like to think of it more as a recommendation!! she'd be happier, cooler and ACCORDING TO HER, a better gamer (specifically if she went on HRT)!! 👀

[certifiedsexed]

not juneteenth related but on the subject of pride month going rather shittily for me, nvm.

I just met a gay trans girl (who is apparently not at all alone in her opinion) who is dedicated to the forcefem of some youtuber slimersomething. we're so back 😂🥹

[certifiedsexed]

Okay admittedly not watched tooo much but seeing the videos, Charlie is kinda giving Her✨ vibes. I think I need to see some Egg Moments Edits of her fr bc...🤔 the potential is real.

[ihaveanaxe]

I heard “slimersomething” and went “holy shit Slimecicle” then figured that a slime YouTuber would probably make more sense, turns out NO ITS FUCKING SLIMECICLE THIS IS CRAZY CERTIFIED SEX ED KNOWS SLIMECICLE AND IS ACCUSING HIM OF BEING AN EGG IM GOING CRAZYYY

[certifiedsexed]

LMAO ngl, I didn't think anyone would specifically clock who I was talking about but as soon as I posted this, I quickly discovered not only is there a very specific circle on Tumblr rooting for Charlie's egg to crack but quite a number of them follow me

💀 which, like, respect, I just wasn't aware of the diversity of my followers interests lol. maybe I should ask for some game/r recs!

also, I'd like to think of it more as a recommendation!! she'd be happier, cooler and ACCORDING TO HER, a better gamer (specifically if she went on HRT)!! 👀

[mudswept]

emergency moving/vet funds needed

my friends are disabled black trans couple who are moving to a different state for safer housing, but they need to be able to pay their movers and take their cat to the vet first.

$900 needed ASAP or by tomorrow if possible

cashpp/vmo: torkz428

pypal: torkz