i'm weighing in as someone who started watching the show at first by seeing gallavich compilations on youtube, before finally watching the show last june, so i recognize i may have a subconscious bias that was created by already knowing the end BUT: i liked trevor when he first showed up. i liked him as a friend for ian. i think that ian's dynamic with mandy was one of my fav parts of the whole show, as well as fiona and vee, and i wish we got more of the gallaghers just having friends. i loved the idea of ian having a queer friend who could understand him and help him understand the community. i liked how he had a purpose, something that ian himself prides himself on. i thought they were fun and flirty and it was all good. maybe this is because i didn't see trevor as a 'threat' because i knew gallavich were endgame. but my opinion on trevor only changed slightly when they got romantic and didn't seem compatible, and i've posted about this before, but i think the show was trying too hard to push a more inclusive, sex-positive narrative for ian, which could have been great, especially considering how narrow and sometimes regressive his experiences had been prior! but they went about it the wrong way, and it started with ian sleeping with a woman and ended with his relationship with trevor. ian was pushed outside of his comfort zone continually, and forced into things because he was made to believe if he didn't do these things then there was something wrong with him or he didn't know himself. the writers dropped the ball, and i couldn't invest myself in the ship romantically when i recognized this pattern. trevor accusing ian of not being sex-positive and being prejudice just because he won't budge on something that trevor won't budge on either? yeah, nah. and trevor assuming he knows how to handle frank (and monica) better than ian does without knowing anything about ian's upbringing? why make him condescending in that way? what were the writers thinking?
Sorry for taking so long to answer this. Life be lifeing.
One of my most uttered grievance of Shameless (and many MANY other TV shows) is: LET THEM HAVE FRIENDS!!!
I actively liked Trevor when he first showed up. Their meet cute was indeed cute! Ian checking out Trevor’s arse? Well, have you seen his arse? Fair fuck’s for checking it out!! Them both walking away, then glancing back at each other, then both realising they both glanced back at each other and blushing and smiling about it? CUTE!!!
And then they go to hook up and realise they’re not immediately sexually compatible, and they laugh about it, and that’s cute, too. Big fan. Loved it!
Everything that followed after? Well… not quite misstep after misstep, but it gets iffy.
There’s definitely validity in sex with any new person being a learning curve, which should include a whole lot of communication, and willingness to try out things you maybe haven’t ever tried before. Or maybe tried with one person a very long time ago and never again because you didn’t like it then. It’s a little bit like just because you didn’t like broccoli when you were 8, doesn’t mean you won’t like broccoli now that you are 35.
I try and live by the rule ‘Try everything at least twice’. And hate the idea that you can meet someone and get on like a house on fire and be physically attracted to them, but then you have sex one time and it’s not movie magic sex with swelling strings and perfectly synchronised simultaneous orgasms, and so you immediately break up. That’s bullshit.
And for a while their banter over penetrative sex and who sticks what to whom - while they clearly merrily have all sorts of sex that seems to be going very well for them - is cute, too. The cafe scene where… Trevor orders a muffin top to make a really bad joke about topping? I don’t 100% recall but it include the “you’re relentless” - “you’re a punk” exchange and again, it’s CUTE.
And at that point they actually communicate. They talk about boundaries. They approach sex with each other as a separate thing from all other sex they have had before, and that maybe different rules should apply. All of that is good! Show me more communication in bed, but also, more importantly, communication before the clothes come off. I love it!
Unfortunately that - from what I recall - is also the scene where Trevor tells Ian he should be more sex positive, and when Ian asks what that one is again Trevor says ‘all sex is good sex, as long as it’s consensual’. And… well… it clearly isn’t right now. For either of you!! So that sentence doesn’t even make sense. Good work writers room. You just found a buzz word and tried to put it in your show because it sounded good. 🙄
And of course we all remember the “Okay, let’s talk boundaries?” - “My boundary? Don’t stick it in my ass!” exchange. If your boundary is ‘Don’t stick it in my arse’ then that’s where you say octopus and put your clothes back on!! 😤 And yeah, end of the day… sex shouldn’t be decided by coin flip. So there’s all of that. All of which is bad.
And then after this we fall down the ‘Trevor is a (badly written) LGBTQ+ pamphlet’ rabbit hole, and that’s a pretty bad place to be, also. But this has already gone on too long, and I have not met a single person in fandom who doesn’t roll their eyes at the pronoun café disaster, so no need to go into that right now.
The Monica thing is a whole different writer’s room problem, because Ian is a dick to Trevor about the ID thing, and then Trevor is the most out of character he has ever been, telling Ian to just forgive his abusive mum for all the neglect, because she’s here now and wants to take us dancing and you’re totally ruining the vibe, man. 🙄 No good youth councillor - and we have clearly established Trevor as a good one - would ever say something like that. Ever. It’s pure character assassination. Which the writer’s room felt the need to do, because we as the audience have to hate Trevor in that moment, so we can root for Mickey when he shows up, and so we can absolutely support Ian’s decision to leave the country with Mickey, without saying a word to Trevor but still somehow without tarnishing the reputation of our little honey puppy baby Ian…
Penetrative sex isn't the be all and end all, nor is it the sole requirement for pleasure or intimacy
‘Sex Positivity’ doesn’t mean you get your way
Unrelatedly, the writes room annihilated Trevor’s character to facilitate Mickey’s return
I needed another sentence to complete the rainbow, but I’m sleepy now
