#askchocotrooper

[askherozack]

Hey Zack, So i was wondering, can you sing or do you have any other hidden talents and do any other SOLDIERS have hidden talents that you've discovered.

Well, I sometimes sing in the shower, but I don't think I'm exactly Midgar Idol quality.

If you wanna know about my... talents... ahem, ask Cloud.

[askherozack]

I don't own any skirts and no I am not borrowing yours. Tell me at least where one pair is so I can actually cook you something tonight instead of you slowly stopping your heart with fastfood.

Aw, fine... Bottom drawer of the dresser, under my uniform pants.

Your cooking is way too persuasive...

[askherozack]

No, I don't, but I'm not exactly keen on going to the grocery store in my boxers. That's kind of a frown-upon thing in society.

You could wear a skirt?

A-and if you do, swing by the training room so I can see!

[askherozack]

Zackary, did you hide all of my pants again.

Maybeeee. You don't have duty today, so it's fine, though!

[askherozack]

Oh my, look at Cloud...

I am!

Boobies!

[askherozack]

Cloud's Birthday - Update!

Well, got dragged off last time before I could finish even starting the story, but I've got a few quite moments now so I'll try to type up the rest of it!

So we're in the Gold Saucer, and Cloud's got his blindfold on. Poor trooper is so nervous he can't even let go of my hand, but I just lead him along to the next part of the plan.

So, the Gold Saucer has a lot of really neat stuff, like I said: Chocobo Races, slot machines, a battle arena, all sorts of awesome stuff really. And one of the special perks that you get when you buy a premium membership is text messages about new features, and the ability to try out those new features before anyone else. And you can bring a friend!

Well, about two months before Cloud's birthday, I got a text about something new, and I immediately started planning. Occasionally I think ahead, ya know? So I've had this on reserve for months, now, and I made all the proper connections and talked to all the right people to get it set up just right.

They're not even technically available to the public right now, but they should be soon, so I shouldn't get in trouble for sharing this...

One of the Saucer's new features is private all-terrain cars that you can rent. I ordered one up for me and Cloud, and we headed out to the next stop on our plans. Still early afternoon, of course, plenty of time to get there, but MAN those things go FAST over sand! But I had to slow it down when Cloud got a little motion sick, so I took his blindfold off and we stopped for lunch and let his stomach get settled.

Then back on with the blindfold and to our destination!

Which I'll share all the details of a little later on. Cloud's callin' me over.

[askherozack]

Wup.

Well, Cloud's got duty in the morning, so he went back to his room, 'cause I always turn his alarm clocks off so we can get more sleep. So looks like he's gone.

I've got a handful of small missions lined up this week, so I'll be pretty busy between now and... next week sometime? Might not get to asks as quickly as usual.

Zackie out!

(Mun's got work all week, guys, and will be over on Axel's blog from Friday to Monday [psst, follow askaheartlesspyro if you like Kingdom Hearts, AkuRoku, and some upcoming lulz]. See y'all pretty soon, though!)

[askherozack]

@askchocotrooper

Sweet Shiva's tits, Zack had never been so drunk in his life.

Well, maybe he had, but it certainly didn't feel like it. What had started as a simple "I owe you a drink" to Reno had ended with the SOLDIER at 'Turkish Delight', apparently the favored bar of the Turks (and quite possibly a gay bar, the boob ratio was seriously low here). Seventeen shots of jager and one spectacular little concoction called a "Midgar Carbomb" later, he was having a hard time remembering which way was up, as Rude led him towards the door.

His phone was in his hands, an open message in it, and the SOLDIER tried to think coherently of what he had been talking about. He'd been telling Cloud something... something about woman. It must have been about boobs!

I think you'd look hot in a dress is what the SOLDIER definitely meant to type. What came out was a blurred jargon, along the lines of omfg cloud where a sress for me an d d sexy pannties i will suick your cock so ard.

Seemed logical enough, and he sent the message off without a second thought. They were outside now, Midgar's cool night air doing little for his sense of coherency. Not that it mattered, Rude was talking about body shots and Zack couldn't wait to drink booze out of the big, bald Turk's belly button.

"We should bring Tseng with us!" He slurred, leaning into the big man and laughing a little. "Do body shots on his Turk suit!" Rude replied noncommittally, looking around a bit more desperately for whoever the SOLDIER had been texting with. He didn't care who it was at this point, he just didn't want to have to deal with more than one drunk mess tonight. Reno was bad enough.