Pairing: Yeosang x Reader(fem)
Wordcount: 441
Gif-Source: Mine
Warnings: +18! MDNI // read A/N
A/N: I was cleaning the kitches as my brain suddenly and out the fuck randomly dropped THIS moment from legacy in my mind and was like "imagine him being on top of you and leans back to watch where *redacted*"
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Yeosang waited so long to have you, it had become unbearable. But the long unbearable, made this moment all the more sweet.
Both your bodies bare. Heated from heavy, needy kisses that kept your lips attached. Oh how sweet you tasted... How soft your lips; Your tongue so delicately grinding in tune with his.
This man has so much restraint with himself, always. But now he can drop it, bit by bit. Oh can you imagine the sounds escaping this man? How pleased his breath hitches when he feels you pressing against him-; Your thigh at his crotch, getting him hard just from that; A pressed exhale escaping through his nostrils. A pleased groan, as your tongue grinds over his, before you catch his lower lip between your teeth -gently, pulling.
He wanted you for so long. And now, you were beneath him. Your body so beautiful; Feeling so good "I can't stop touching you" he mumbles to himself; You are the last to want him to stop. His hands Oh god his hands... have been so careful at the beginning; Now, they are running hungry insatiable over your body; He needs to touch you, all of you. To feel, all of you. On the surface- Your warm, soft skin. And, inside.
Something in his mind almost snapped when his digits parted your folds -so easy, so dripping; Before his middle and ring-finger slowly dive inside you. Oh god... You are so warm. So wet- wrapping around his fingers so well.
The little sounds he already draws out of you with just his fingers inside you... His lips hungry at yours- wanting to catch every little noise escaping you because of him. Every little whine, every little hitch of your breath.
This is, until your sweet plead: "I need you. I need you inside me."
Now, he was about to snap. His lips pressing onto yours. An attempt to 'distract' him from immediatly cuming inside you-; You just feel too good. And although he knows he might dissolve under it- He has to break the kiss.
He leans away. Straightens, and takes in the sight of where your bodies meet. Where he disappears inside you, wrapping around him-; His abdomen clenches at the sight- at the feeling; My god you just feel so heavenly good.
He slightly moves his hips, angeling them; Your chest quivers, your breath hitches so so sweet. He can't. He needs to kiss you again, feel you- have you so close-!
He immedialty leans down to catch your lips with his again. Lovely. Devouring. He needs you. Needs more. His hips starting to move . He needs all of you.
********
A/N: I CANNOT WITH THIS MAN SOMEONE SEDATE ME!!!!
I cannot handle this man fr. It's--- Man I love the Legacy MV!
Was the slow-slowmo necassary? Yeah.
Yeosang x Reader "One kiss won't ruin our friendship"
Masterlist🤺 Blog Guide✨ AO3♦️ OT8 series⏳
Pairing: Yeosang X Fem!Reader
Wordcount: 6.1k
Summary: This was so supposed to be just a little last part to the "One kiss won't ruin our friendship" series, but it escalated because I'm super biased // friends to lovers, service-dom ys, down bad-ism // Y/N has been single for a while-while and is struggling a bit as one of her friends gets engaged. Struggle she attempts to solve with a dating profile and consulting her friends (Yunho, Yeosang, San)
Warnings: +18! MDNI! // bit Angsty (fighting, mention of a not so good past relationship, Smutty (oral, YS giving)
A/N: I tried to keep it gn, but I am depresso so I am indulging today instead of studying as I badly should... Maybe writing this one fic will finally heal me and let me act responsible again!
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You love your friends! You are happy for them! To be honest, everyone of you had just waited for San to propose. And now, he was engaged. The wedding was still unplanned, but that was no excuse to celebrate a little in advance. A lavish several courses meal. Only this dinner felt like part of a wedding already. It was good though! More than just delicious int taste and certainly lovely in company.
You sit in Yeosangs car, as he is driving you home. Since you had moved apartments, it wasn’t really the same direction anymore he had to head home, but after all this time together, it was out of question to not still drive you home.
“Ah, shit, I forgot.” you suddenly remember.
“What-?” Yeosang already breaking and setting the blinker to take the next exit.
“No stay-! I didn’t forget anything at the restaurant.” you assure and he stays on the highway “Mingi owed us two 100,000 ₩, tho. Forgot to tell him.”
You don’t have to explain why. Yeosang immediately knows and chuckles. “I still think he was close with Yunho.”
“I agree, he might be second to get married; But Sannie definitely was and now is, gonna marry first from you guys.”
“He won’t give it to us until the wedding happened and they are probably back from their honeymoon.”
“Probably.” you grin. Mingi is not the stingy kind, but he is not good in admitting that he was wrong.
San is getting married. That fact spins and spins in your head the whole ride. To a part it feels so early- You guys are still so young! But you are all grown adults now. You have jobs, responsibilities; Some dreams and life goals come true already, and some still ahead.
“I know we’re all getting close to our thirties” speaks Yeosang just what you are thinking right now “But it’s weird to have the first of us now to be this ‘adult’...”
“We’re getting old, Sangie.” you sigh “I recently had one of those street interview reels in feed and some teenager said that everyone born after 2000/ 2001 is old.”
“Argh-” he gasps, painfully placing his hand over his chest; “Rude youth.”
“So rude!”
You both laugh. But it’s true. Life, actual Life- You were now in it. And it was on you to build what you had dreamed of as a child; What you wanted for yourself. Your own family, with a nice place to life… … I need a partner for that tho. You realize and- Shit… Suddenly your mood drops rapidly.
Yeosang notices the difference in the silence and eyes over to you, but since you’re looking outside, he can’t read your face, just yet. Since you are still silent, he uses the next stoplight to adjust the mirror on your outside of the car to catch a glimpse.
He knows that look of yours. Sorrow and insecurity. Uncertainty. He doesn’t like this look on your face. But he leaves you for the moment; You keep your gaze certainly away from him. You need a moment to think. Eventually you arrive at your apartment-complex and he drops you off.
You don’t sleep well that night. You cry even. But the next morning you found the answer to your worries and you spend the day curating. A few days later you meet up with Yeosang, San and Yunho for lunch and show them proudly your little project you had been working on.
“A dating-profile?” names Yunho what is to see on your phone, placed in the middle of the table for all of them to see.
San immediately grabs it and scrolls through your carefully put together profile- smiling proudly at your work and laughing at a joke you put in there. “It looks good, Y/N! I’m sure there will be many interested in you.”
“Are you texting with someone?” Yunho sounds just as curious.
“No, I didn’t swipe yet. I wanted to wait to do that with you guys, as- you know, assistance.”
“Assistance?”
“You are decent men. Idiots, but decent and I trust your judgments.”
San and Yunho look at another, than back at you “There is a compliment in it, we accept.”
“Of course you do.” you chuckle and notice, just as the other two, that Yeosang hasn’t said anything so far.
“Yeosang, what do you think?” Yunho, blunt and a bit pushy.
“It’s good.” he says. That is all he says. And so monotone.
All three of you stare at him. You disappointed. The other two: “That ain’t much.”
Now he is the one who looks confused, especially at San and Yunho “We all know Y/N, of course she’ll put together a good profile.”
“So you would swipe right on her?” digs Yunho.
“What does that mean?”
“It means you are interested and would like to text and meet her.” explains San.
“But I am already doing that.”
The two other men groan and roll their eyes, while you snatch your phone back and put it away. Yeosang just stares at all of you, not able to understand what the issue is.
Thankfully, the ordered lunch just gets brought to the table and gives everyone a break from this very odd turned conversation. For a moment it stays quiet and you all rather focus on your meal. You are glad about the silence, while also feeling some disgusting hot beating in your chest. Anger.
“I think it’s a good idea to put yourself out there. To give it a try.” eventually starts San again., encouragingly smiling at you. You appreciate it. They know you to understand why some things are going a little hesitant for you.
Therefore, they all should be on the same side, but- “I just don’t understand why it has to be a dating app.” so is Yeosang apparently not. “You’re a young, beautiful, confident woman- There must be many approaches.”
“If there would have been approaches, I would have mentioned them, wouldn’t I?” you’re starting to feel an urge to throw something at your best friend. You don’t understand where this is coming from suddenly.
Yunho chuckles and pats Sans shoulder “Your wonderful fiance asked you just the same recently.”
“Hmhm!” nods San, very vividly remembering; Apparently he had talked about it with Yunho.
“You care to share??” you nod at both, but Yunho leaves it to San, who finishes chewing, before elaboratings; then he points his chopsticks in a waving motion at Yeosang. “All what you just mentioned, Sangie- All those are things that can be very intimidating to men.”
You don’t say it out loud, but your face does: What the fuck?
Yunho sees it and nods at you “We can be a very insecure species, don’t overestimate us.”
“However, with that profile” continues San and now points at you “Y/N gives them a chance to approach her easier and get over the insecurity of talking directly to a beautiful woman.” then he continues eating, like he had just talked about the weather.
You are touched, in a way, and confused as hell. You don’t think of yourself as intimidating. What the fuck?
“I still don’t get it.” mutters Yeosang eventually.
You sigh annoyed and cannot withold the bitter tone in your voice “Thank you for being on my side…”
“I am on your side.”
“Then why do you not think this could be good for me? Like Yunho said: Putting myself out there!”
“You can put yourself out there. But why should you even go out with someone who is that easily intimidated by you?”Youare walking sunshine. “The person you go out with, should be at least as confident and competent as you are.”
Your mouth gapes open, more and more. You don’t get it. Well, you do, but he has never talked like that. It would be complimentary, if it wouldn’t be so discouraging. “In case you didn’t notice, Kang Yeosang, that didn’t bring me any further, as for the kind of ‘situation’ of being single I am at, Still;” Don’t you want me to have someone I am happy with? “I don’t even have someone in mind who could my plus-one for Sans wedding, that isn’t even planned yet! And I would like to have that opportunity to meet someone I could maybe think of bringing!”
“Why do you worry about that? We will all go together again, as a group friends.”
“I appreciate knowing all of you,” you look at Yunho and San, before turning at Yeosang again “but since we made it so far in adulthood that one of us doing a very adult thing by getting married; I would like attend as one as well. As an individual who has their own—” you gulp down the stingy lump in your throat. “Partner and- …” Family, in the future. Not the one I was born in, but the one I chose for myself. With the one who chose me.
He doesn’t respond anything after that. You know he is thinking something, but he won’t spit it out.
It’s safe to say this lunch wasn’t as expected. After, you want to take the bus home, rather than sitting with Yeosang in a car, as he usually brings you home. But Yunho just pulls you with him- thinking he will bring both of you to his car; But he sits you both down in Yeosangs. Bastard…
The drive is quiet. You and Yunho sit in the back- His place coming up first. Leaving you and Yeosang alone. But not leaving without saying “I know there is a conflict between you, but I know you will solve it because you managed before and you mean a lot to another. Thanks for the ride man!” to then close the door and walk off, before either of you can say anything. You scoff at Yunho, although he is already gone.
The drive continues. The silence loud as a jumbo jet. As he parked in front of your apartment-complex. As he and you leave his car. As you ride the elevator- Until the door to your apartment shuts behind you two.
“You’re my best friend, Y/N.” he eventually starts.
“And you are mine, Yeosang! But that doesn’t give you the right to- Argh!” you aggressively want to kick off your shoes, but slip at it. Yeosang stabilizes you, then crouches down and opens both shoes for you, to easily step out of them. He places them at their usual spot as you step onto the hardwood-floor. “Thanks…” you mutter, appreciative; One deep inhale, then you continue a little calmer “I thought you of all people would understand. That you would see that I am pursuing to find happiness with this. Don’t you want me to be happy?”
“I do.” he doesn’t take off his shoes but stays at the door. “I want you to be happy! But you-;” he stops.
“What? My high standards? Because, just as I said earlier: My high standards didn’t bring me anywhere! I am still single. And again for you: No! I was not approached! I would have told you!”
“And I believe you that! I just don’t understand it when-” he gasps, disbelieving of reality “It’s good that you have those standards. I mean you are high standard and you deserve someone who meets those for you as well!”
“What is it then?! What else could it be that-” you halt as you suddenly realize; your shoulders sink and your voice lowers “Is it because of him?” you don’t have to say the name, but just from the look you see in Yeosangs eyes; “It’s because of my last relationship, is it?”
“I don’t want you to get hurt again.”
“I believe you got that in common with Yunho and San as well.”
“I know!” he sighs, his hand grabbing the back of his neck “But you should not waste your time on someone who isn’t the right one for you.”
“But somehow and some time I need to start looking for that person! Time isn’t running backwards and I although I am confident and happy with myself, there is a part of me that undeniably craves connection like th-at.” your voice breaks and you feel tears filling your eyes. “And although it doesn’t matter to me mostly- for a part it does. A part fo me is embarrassed how long it’s been, no matter that I didn’t even want anyone!”
He steps out of his shoes in an instant and reaches you “There is nothing embarrassing about that, you needed your time.” his arms slightly held up, ready to embrace you any moment if you break.
“I know but-! God dammit Yeosang! I don’t even know anymore what a kiss feels like! To be kissed, to-” you sob, unable to hold back the tears anymore, you hate it, it’s so embarrassing “To feel wanted. Genuinely. Which I never felt, looking back. It was all but lust that needed to be fed- that I needed to feed and do and give whatever to receive just a bit of attention…” your voice breaks. You break- cry and sob, hiding your face behind your hands and Yeosang catches you. He holds you and you cry against him. Your voice so frail now “I want to know -not again, but for once, what it feels like when someone wants me. Me... Because I am Me! And not just to fill any fucking void within anyone...”
You cry and sob against him. Yeosang holds you the whole time. His hands soothingly caress your back; Your crying fading bit by bit. Even as the tears had faded, you still hold onto him. You’re scared to let go.
“It shouldn’t be just anyone who makes you feel again, and for the first time.” he gently caresses your head. Soothing.
You hear him. You understand him. Appreciate it. But something still inside you, quietly whispers “That’s not for you to decide…”
His shoulders stiffen, his chest tightens and he guides you backwards to sit on one of the two chairs in your little kitchen. He inhales deep before he looks at you again “But it’s what you deserve.”
He means it. He won’t let go off it and somehow- does it make you speechless. You stare at him. He holds your gaze. Each of you waiting for the other to agree. But you won’t. You don’t. And as he realizes you won’t, he turns around- his hands running through his hair as he exhales heavy, trying to keep composure “Come on, Y/N, after all that, it is so much more that you deserve!” but fails, as he turn around again “It should be someone who knows you-! Who really knows you! Someone who knows that that is a bigger deal for you than you are admitting to yourself and telling whoever you’re meeting on that app. Someone gentle, someone caring, who will hold you through everything- be there for you, no matter what!”
“You mean ‘the one’? The ‘right one’.” you realize.
“Yeah.” he exhales, with a face looking way too painful “Because he would be terrified to touch you! Terrified to initiate anything too early and make you uncomfortable or even hurt you...”
You just look at him. Something just shifted. Between you. With him. With you. Is it the worry you see in his eyes? Is it something else you spot within them, but act like you don’t?
You reach for one of his hands and hold it. “Yeosang, no matter what ever happened to me, you can’t protect me from anything that could potentially happen. You just have to trust me, that I am capable in seeing and recognizing who is good and who not.”
“You are more than capable of that.” he sighs. His gaze lowering, shoulders sinking and- he kneels down before you. Defeated. Defeated? “I’m sorry.” he slowly looks up at you again “I wasn’t a good friend today, I made you sad and uncomfortable.”
“You’re right, but not entirely.” you smile and gently put one strand out of his face, his eyes closing at your touch “You made me mad, not uncomfortable.”
“Mad and sad…” he would have rather had it differently. “I’m sorry.”
This was a lot…
Yeosang stays for a moment longer, but not much. You both need a little breather after this. You both need a moment to think.
Yeosangs drive home is- … He doesn’t know if he did the right thing. If he said too much or not enough. It feel like both.
You, sit on your couch and stare into nothingness. Replay the lunch, the fight you two had and everything he said. It’s not that you don’t appreciate his care for you but- … … But- what? Why exactly did you make that dating-profile? Because you thought it would be easier? Or because you didn’t dare to look what’s in front of you? Did you persist on that damn app, because you didn’t want to look at him? At Yeosang? And the more he showed you reasons- genuinely, for you caring reasons, why you should try a different attempt-- Did he hammer cracks into the wall that you had build, to make it easier? Because of what you saw undeniably in his eyes, earlier and so many times- but you had ignored?
You feel your chest tightening- Your intestines; Feeling the itch in your hands to grab your phone and open the chat with: ‘Yeo sing sang sung-ie 💖’. You chuckle. Fucking stupid name. But as he had seen you had named him like this, he was one who had added that sparkly heart.
<< Hey Sangie, you forgot your wallet here.
Are you home? I’ll bring it over.
Yeosang reads the message and stares at the side-table at the door, where his keys and wallet always go. Keys at place. Wallet at place as well. Then looks at the chat again, and doesn’t hesitate.
>>Thank you😊
I’m home, you can come over!
On your way to Yeosang, you pick up his current favorite bubble tea. You had made up, but since you lied in that message, you need to bring him something and not hold onto it longer than necessary “I lied in that text-message, but I brought you bubble tea.” you hold the cup right in front of his face, as he opens the door. You hear him chuckle, even before he takes it out of your hand, stepping aside for you to come in.
“Last time you lied, you brought me Tteokbokki.”
He doesn’t say it because he rather wanted Tteokbokki, but because it’s very rare that you lie, to then immediately apologize for it with anything he likes.
“Hmhm…” you hum, following him to his living room and casualy drop it “I think you were right.”
He stops in his steps. Frozen, for a second, then turns around. “Wha-t?”
You take the bubble-tea out from and place it on the little in front of the couch, where you sit down. “You were right with what we fought about earlier. The dating-app. Me choosing anyone-”
“No no no-” he hurriedly sits down beside you “Like you said, it’s your decision and you are more than aware to select someone good for you.”
“I am.” you smile, confident knowing that, and yet getting shy in asking “Do you wanna be that for me?”
“Wh-What?” his brain circuiting.
“I thought about it what you said and you are right. You know me. You really now me and how much this actually means to me that we ended up fighting about it. I didn’t want to see how much respect and care you hold for me, because that would have made it more difficult to admit to myself that I don’t want just anyone to- to help me. And the nI was so focused on being right, that I didn’t see any other possibility.”
“Any other possibility as in, asking me.” no question.
“It would be just for a kiss, but only if you’re okay with it-!”
“I am okay with that!” Shit, should I have said that??? “But- but- there should be date- I- I mean you deserve to have at least a bit of build up for that since-”
“It would be just one kiss, Yeosang.” you chuckle, cup his cheek to make him stop rambling. “It’s just a kiss. One kiss won’t ruin our friendship.”
He looks at you. Your words sinking in. Reading your face. Really, reading it. What you say. What you don’t say. He takes your hand from his cheek and holds it with on his lab. Your hands are so soft, so warm and he realizes he can’t say no to you. Nor does he want to. “You’re right.”
It’s a lie but none of you cares. He moves closer, your thighs right at another and you realize it’s gonna happen. Your heart stops and shivers at the same time.
“If you want me to stop, that’s okay, you can always tell me.” he reminds.
Even more why I want it to be you. “I know.”
He smiles, assuring. His eyes gentle, so beautiful. So warm. Oh how much you love this brown. He leans closer and cups your cheek with one hand, pulling you close enough- resting his forehead against yours. You hear him exhale. Seemingly calm but there is some tension in it. His nose gently grazes against yours. Giving you a moment, listening to your breathing.“Are you nervous?” he whispers, but his voice sounding slightly different now.
“Yea-h.” while yours sounds like a shiver.
“Me too.” he smiles.
“You don’t seem nervous.”
He leans away, one finger under your chin, making you look at him- Ohhh… Something changed in his features. His eyes-; Yeosang--You’ve never seem like this. So grounded. Leading. “If you would just know, Y/N.” his voice so husky, making your heart flutter. Yeosang notices “It’s okay, I got you.” His words are barely audible, but for you. His thumb softly strokes over your skin. You nod, nervous but trusting. It’s what he waited for.
As Yeosang leans in, you cloes your eyes to not panic. But then, as you feel his lips on yours. Gentle. Careful. You don’t know anymore what you were anxious about. He pauses for you after this little kiss. Scans your face as you take in the feeling -your eyes still closed. He closes the gap again, kisses you again. Still gentle and careful, but a little longer. This time you seem less frozen.
Once more he pulls away “You okay?” his voice so soft.
You nod, opening your eyes with a small smile on your lips, while his thumb soothingly strokes over your cheek. “One more.”
His heart stings at your plead- Melts at your voice and the softness in your eyes. He can’t deny you. Nothing, ever, he knows. And even if he could, he wouldn’t want to. He leans in again, and this time, he doesn’t pull away. He lets you grow more confident again- lean into him; The kisses growing deeper with every time your lips touch. Your hands clinging onto his sides, pressing yourself against him. Ohhh he will not be able to hold onto any more restraint. But he tries. Still, he tries “Do you-” he breathes between your kiss “Tell me to stop if it’s-” but you silence him with a kiss- your hands at the nape of his neck “Please, Yeosang-” you plead at his lips “More…”
The tone of your voice, the words you chose- Something snaps inside him. Makes him grab you at your waist and pull you on his lab. You gladly do so, you legs spread, facing him- Ohh how much you have missed that… Your hands run, crave over his chest that heaves under your palms; his hands cupping your ass, fingers pressing; You can’t stop kissing him, he tastes too good, smells so good and his lips…; And Yeosang, he knows he is gone already and that he will only fall even deeper for you, and that is exactly what he wants to. You, on his lab, feeling your soft lips, tasting you, moving your pelvis- grinding it over his lab, at his harder growing cock; Not even mentioning the little but sweetly pleasing sighs escaping you that sound more and more like moans; He can’t believe this is really happening. He wants you so much right now and the more time passes, the more and more he wants you. San should have gotten engaged earlier.
“Put your arms around my neck.” he breath heavy.
“Wh-at?”
“Arms around my neck.” he orders.
Shit. That sends something through your body, that you cannot even describe as a shiver. You feel the heat inside you burn and do immediately as he says. His hands moving lower to the backside of your thighs “Trust me.” he smiles, and just as you want to ask what he means, he grabs your thinghs and “Aahh—” you squeal, while your legs instinctively wrap around his waist as he stands up from the couch while carrying you. You stop the kiss and stare down at him as you find yourself in the air, in his arms.
“You good?” Yeosang grins brighter than pride and satisfaction could name it.
“Yeah-” you gasp, damn surprised about his strength.
“Good. The couch is nice but my bed is more comfortable. Yeah?”
Your bed… You know where there is going. You feel yourself clenching just by the thought of it, by the anticipation- pooling hot inside you. You nod eagerly and kiss him again, lost your voice, while he carries you to his bedroom. You don’t stop kissing him along the way. You wonder if you ever have truly known Yeosang. Or maybe you have, except for this side of him. And you cannot deny- the more time passes, the more you kiss him, the more you feel him, the more you hear, feel and see him wanting you- it turns you on so unexpected and so devastatingly hard.
As he carries you, you don’t notice any imbalance in his grip, while walking the whole way, opening the door and setting you down on his bed. It’s been a while since you’ve been this far with someone. But not one insecurity makes its way through to you. If anything, it is impatience that gnaws inside you. Want, so much want. Your fingers hook in at the belt-loop of his pants “Help me take off my clothes.”
He smiles pleasantly and pulls at the hem of your shirt. “Will you help me take off mine?”
“No.” you breathe and open button and zip to your jeans in one motion “I want to watch when you take them off.”
Fuck-- his dick twitching in his pants “Anything you want.” He kisses you once more, then he grabs the hem of your shirt and pulls it over your head; Your hair all over the place, but he carefully combs it back into place; then, he frames your face and- just looks at you for a moment, not believing that you two are in this moment right now “You’re so beautiful.” he speaks rather to himself. You raise your chin and close the gap between your lips. I love you, Y/N…
With you top off, you open the back of your bra with ease, while Yeosangs pulls it off your shoulders. Bare -to a part, you are before him. Beautiful... His breath hitches- his hands cupping them, stroking of your nipples, before (a little resistant) they wander to the waistband of your jeans. You lift your pelvis and he pulls them off. Ohh… How much he wants to find out how you taste- how you smell; “Move up.” he says, commands once more. His voice direct but gentler this time. You do as he says and move up further onto the middle of the bed. He watches you. You catch him staring between your thighs. Catch him inhaling deeply- licking and biting his lower lip- that hunger in his eyes; You feel yourself throb and dripping at the sight.
But, you had proclaimed what you wanted him to do- And so he does. As you lie on his bed, propped on your elbows, you watch him standing at the end of it; Opening his belt and slowly pulling it out of every belt-hole, letting it snap before dropping it to the floor. His eyes don’t let go of you, like yours don’t let go of him. Noticing, how your gaze mostly stays on his hands, but also how it wanders lower to the hard bulge under the fabric of his pants. He doesn’t know how your fingers sting to touch him. How your tongue yearns to taste him. But he reads it from your face- it makes his dick twitch. Therefore, he safes it last.
In a swift motion, he pulls off his shirt, unveiling his damn defined torso, along with the dark trail of hair, reaching from below his waistband, almost entirely up to his navel. Your mouth gapes open. He looks unreal, already. But as he takes off his pants and you see the more than certain outline in his boxers, you can only shake your head. “Shit…” escapes you inaudible.
He grins curiously as he crawls on the bed as well, hovering over you “Why are you shaking your head like that?” he cradles your face again.
“Y-ou are--” you start stutter, one hand touching his well formed chest; you don’t find any better way to describe him than “You are more beautiful than any Adonis statue in this world.”
He giggles. He giggles (!) so sweet and blushes so cute in the way that many people know him. Only the ‘cute’ Yeosang. But you know more of him now. More and more fully. Because the way he kisses you now, is so far from cute or sweet. His teeth gently pull at your lower lip- making you gasp and open your mouth for him to grind his tongue over yours, while he moves his pelvis -his hardened dick, against your hot beating core at the same time. God…
Your hands run up to the nape of his neck and through his hair, pulling him closer to you again. He groans at the sensation- Fuck does he sound good…
That’s it. That’s what you had missed. What you had genuinely not experienced, until now. Yeosang, I love you…
Your kiss stays deep, heated; One leg wrapped around his waist as you two keep grinding yourself on another; One of his hands at your breast, sweetly and just rightly twisting your nipple. Sweet, little moans escape you hardly- he swallows them all with every kiss. Until, his bulge grinds over your swollen clit in a way too good way, and you moan into his mouth.
He stops, pressing his lips on another as he sharpply exhales through his nose.He can’t wait any longer.
“’You trust me?” his voice urgent, his eyes burning.
“Yes—”
“You will tell me when I shall stop.”
“Please don’t ever stop.”your chest heaves, you voice quivers.
For a moment the hunger in his eyes vanishes, and all you see is yearning glimmering within them. His heart melts at your words and he kisses you sweetly once more, “I won’t.” promising “Everything you want.” before his lips trail off, kissing your jaw, your neck, “I’m yours.” kissing down your sternum “Yours-” kissing further down between your ribs, reaching the hem to your undies. He slightly pulls them down and kisses the top of your mount, inhaling,Oh the way you smell... exhaling deeply and so so content, drunk on your smell already “Yours...”
You want this man. You need this man now! Your finger hook at the sides of your undies and you lift your pelvis once more. Yeosang pulls them off for you, then immediately positions himself between your legs again; His arms wrap around your thighs, angling one them for him for better access and to keep you in place.
“You smell so good.” he mumbles to himself, breathing hot and heavy at your entrance, before his tongue laps sloppy, parting your folds- finally tasting you. “My girl” is all you hear, before Yeosang shows you that his tongue and lips are not just able to kiss your mouth.
Your head falls back at the sensation. One hand gripping onto the sheets, while the other holds onto his strong arm. The movement of his tongue is so precise, as if this wouldn’t be his first time going down on you. His lips wrap around your clit, sucking at it, while his tongue laps and twirls over it. Oh god-- Oh god he’s so good at it. “Fuck—” you whine as you feel the tension inside you tightening “Yeosang I—” you become unable to speak. Your breath quickening- Breaths turning into harder whines- turning into moans- Your legs shaking, but his strong grip keeps you in place; You hear it, you hear the wet lapping sounds and look down and-- … His eyes closed, his face drawn in pleasure, fucking drunk of you; His voice- Oh god… Every breath filled with need, moaning greedy as Yeosang is tasting heaven itself. You. He feels his gaze on you and looks up. His eyes on fire, his tongue lapping sloppy for you to see over your clit- moaning so deeply-- It sends you over the edge. The tension inside you snaps and your orgasm washes over you. At that moment, Yeosang loses it as well. His face pressed against your mount, as he feels his release spill into his boxers. He shakes a little bit. He didn’t want to cum just yet- But if it is because of seeing and hearing you falling apart on his tongue while tasting you, it is a defeat is more than okay with.
Your head has fallen back again, your chest heaves while Yeosang carefully licks over you, collecting what’s dripping out of you- your legs stopping to shake. He still feels himself being hard, even with the undeniable spot in his boxers. “Sangie-” your whisper sounding so tiredly, yet so needy, so sweet; He crawls up to you again; Holding you close, cupping your face before softly, deeply kissing you, letting you taste yourself on his lips.
“Does my girl feel good?”
“Yeah-” you tuck a strand out of his face and gaze at him for a moment; Your chest feeling so light and yet so warm, like sunshine.
“Good.” his thumb grazing over your cheek “I love how you sound when you cum. I wanna hear it all day and night.”
“I like hearing you too.” you smile draw the outline of his lips with your index finger. “I wish tho I could have done more for you.”
“You will, but later.”
“Why?”
“You come first today.” he assures. It’s sweet. You believe him, but t also sounds odd to you. Confusing. He reads it from your face; “You think I didn’t take any kind of pleasure form it as well?” his gaze drops and you follow him, seeing the wet spot at the still existing bulge in his boxers.
“Well- hasn’t happened for me like that before.”
He shakes his head, believing you, but disbelief that someone could not go down on you for their own heaven “I’ll change that.” he promises with a kiss “You’re coming first, today and every day after that, with everything that you deserve. All, that my love deserves.”
It just happens as he says it. This wide, smile arrives on your face. Your cheeks warm, your eyes sparkling.
“You like when I call you that?”
“I really like it.” you admit a bit shy.
“Do you want to be mine?”
“Only if you will be mine as well.” you say and immediately know he’ll narrow his eyes at you. Which he does. He had already declared it earlier, but “I want you to say it again.”
He straightens up and looks at you. Amused. And yet so, so lovely. So lovely… “As my love wishes.” he smiles and kisses the tip your nose “I’m yours” kisses your forehead “You’re mine” kissing your left cheek “I’m yours.” kissing your right cheek “You’re mine.” then stopping right at your lips “My love.” before your lips meet another once more. A sealed promise. For now and all the days that follow after. And Yeosang, he holds onto his word, to show you and give you all that you deserve. All that you, his love, deserves.
********
A/N: Yeosang and Y/N experiencing down-bad-ism. ME also experiencing down-bad-ism for my bias and writing wayyyyyyyyyyyyy much more for him than the others Oops! Trying to escape my responsibilites!
NOW! This is the last part of this series... I was anxious about writing the last parts and as Yeosangs became the very last, my expectations for myself were very high. I haven't written anything in weeks but now it seemed like it had to be this version for Yeosang (which I wrote in one go, like a maniac). I had another one that was even more angsty/ completly angst, but never finished it and it didn't feel right. With this one I wanted to show more of the doberman that he is.
Thank you so much for reading! Leave a comment or reblog to let me know you liked it 💖
Story: Old Friends to Strangers to Lovers // You and Yeosang were once very close friends, until you couldn't handle your feelings for him anymore. You took the opportunity to live abroad for several years. Now you are back in Seoul and bump (literally) into ATEEZ, your old friends.
Warnings: +18! MDNI// ServiceDom Yeosang, masturbation, avoidant attachment
Insp: got highjacket by headcanons from @honeyhotteoks
Pic source: YT
A/N: This was supposed to be a little 1 maybe 2k fic but- here I am, with a 15.5k document, uploading the first part. I was kissed by the muse, but at what cost?
#1# for orientation
*!* marks the beginning of smut
********
Did you ever have a crush you didn’t see coming (back again)? A crush that is not loud and doesn’t overpower. Soft, makeing you sometimes wonder if it's even there because it is so light. Like air. Feathery…
Or is it just something that remained from that anxious storm once inside you? Which was all from your side, of course! Right?
It’s been 4 years--? It’s been 5 actually already since you got to know these goons of ATEEZ. You had bonded with them all while they were still trainees at this relatively newly entertainment company- While you had started studying and just moved out of your parents- Living in a tiny apartment you shared with your roommate, who happen to introduce you to them all.
You had bonded with them all. Only, with one of them you had felt this ‘click’ back then. At least so you had thought.
A hug which had lasted little bit too long than you had ever known and expected of him.
Yeah… A hug… You had been a little delulu about it back then, you knew that now. But during that time -when you had that crush, you had grasped onto it.
It had been stupid. You knew better now, after some time away from them. To be more specific: Living and working there for a few years.
It had been necessary. Not just for your carrier, but even more so because this crush had nested itself over years -even after banishing it, in the furthest, tiniest part inside you.
The moment you had met Yeosang for the first time a voice in the far back of your head had whispered: “You’re gonna fall in love with him.”. Immediately you had shaken your head about this stupid voice. You didn’t even know him! But as you started talking- Seeing each other more often while hanging out with everyone… There came to be some kind of familiarity about him. A feeling surrounding him and surrounding you when you were with him. His understanding. Similarities in the way you two think. The way his eyes lit up when he was talking about something he loved or found interesting. His attentiveness. Randomly buying a Popsicle for both of you (with your favorite flavor).
His care for the people around him. Checking on you when you had been unusually quiet. His tenderness. Just sitting with you and talking with you when you didn’t feel well. His eyes checking, if you were listening when he told something the whole group. Smiling every time your eyes met alone, or when you hung out with everyone else.
One might have said you had been best friends, or at the steps to be. But sadly, your delulu head wouldn’t stop with telling you it was more. Because- How could you have not fallen for him? With him choosing you if you had to like team up for a game or to eat together or drive somewhere.
The trust he showed you with the things he told. Things he hasn’t even told the others before -or told you first, and some of which you knew you were the only one to know.
It had been very obvious that you had liked him. (Especially for everyone around). You knew that he liked you as well, but definitely not in the same way as you did. You never spoke about it. And the more it was sitting inside you, the more it had made you anxious. Little ‘hints’ so you had thought -like meeting gazes, gave you a boost, before you felt him pulling away. Up and down. Push and pull. Breadcrumbs you started to search for, until you realized that you were spiraling.
Therefore, working somewhere abroad had been the best opportunity to fall into your lap at that point. You had just intended to stay for a year, but it was going great, so you stayed another one, and another and--- Up until the company decided you’d be best placed at their new subsidiary in Seoul, as one of the key-people in communicating with their headquarters.
It’s been a year since you’re back and live in Seoul. Big city! Big enough to not cross each others paths. (Maybe putting more effort into it, by avoided the area their agency is at.) One year does pass quite quickly when building a well-functioning new subsidiary.
Though- One year, you had managed to avoid them. Until this week, when you had bumped into them. Quite literally, actually. You had just wanted to get some takeout from a new restaurant. Two steps outside and you had spotted them as if you had been waiting for them. San, Yunho, Mingi and Wooyoung still in the distance, but walking right up your direction.
They hadn't spotted yo! Yet! In a horrible attempt to hide, you pulled the hood of your hoodie and kept your look down while ‘checking your phone’. Only then, to literally bump into someone. Someone being: San and Mingi. As you realized your little attempt had failed, your mind was filled with a mixture of cursing your stupidity and: Goons really had started working out, huh? That chests big!
“Woah! Y/N? Is that you?”
“Oh my god it’s you!”
“Not one word you’re back?” scolds San.
“Is that how you greet your friends?” pouts Mingi.
Shit. “H-Hi!” you stutter, before you feel someone hugging you from behind, really really tight.
“Since when are you back!?” cheers and trills Wooyoung in your ear.
“Let ‘er breathe.” Yunho. Saving you from a squeezing hug, so it seems. But as you look at him, his eyes speak different: I know you saw us and I know why you tried to hide.
“I- I uuh-- Just- Uhm- What are you guys doing here??” you try to avoid answering the question.
“About to eat where you just got your takeout from.”
“Why don’t you join us?”
“You have to join us!”
“Yes! We haven’t seen another in years!”
Were you stupid or just rude? Your old friends right in front of you- So happy to see you although you hadn’t spoken to them at all-; Their cheerful eyes-… You were a horrible friend to avoid them altogether, just because you wanted to avoid Yeosang.
You joined them and while you all sat together, you couldn’t believe you tried to hide and pretend not seeing them. They didn’t change at all, in terms of: Still chaotic, talking over each other and being sweet. And regarding Yunho: subtle.
“I take it Yeosang doesn’t know you’re back either?” he takes the chance to ask while the others yap over what to eat the coming weekend.
“You’re funny.” your voice flatter than a flounder.
“He’ll be happy to hear the news.”
“Hm.” you hum and stuff your mouth full, to not elaborate on this topic. No good strategy tho!
“I’ll tell him.” he smirks. Your eyes dart at him, screaming wide and open. “Oh this reminds me, Y/N!” he starts louder, pulling everyone’s attention on him. “We have a big dinner the coming weekend, you gotta come too!”
JEONG YUN-HO!
The other boys cheer so hyped they are:
“Yes!”
“If you won’t I will never forgive you!”
“That’s the least you can do for running into us!”
You look at them as you chew and hope to find a reason to say no. But, even if you would have something to do this weekend, they wouldn’t let go of getting you to hang out with them, you know that! Therefore, even though you feel the anxiety screaming inside you just imagining of seeing Yeosang “Of course! How could I miss that!” you nod and while the three cheer, you take the chance to dart at Yunho: I hate you.
He smiles soft and leans to you “I would apologize, but the others would have told him anyway and invited you.”
“So you just made the process short and quick, huh? How merciful.”
#1#
Merciful… Fast forward to the weekend, you are standing at the door to one of their shared apartments. An overly tight grip on the liquor bottle you brought -one of the things you still had from abroad; you believe the glass could break any second. Well, if it did, the glass would definitely hurt your hand, maybe so bad that you’d need to get stitched at a hospital and then you wouldn’t have to see Yeosang! … This sounds like a plan, actually. ... But is it really that smart?
“It’s a stupid plan, if one at all…” you sigh and pull out your phone to text the traitor so he can open the door for you.
>I’m at the door. Please don’t let me walk in alone.>
<Got u!<
His message arrives and so are approaching steps. At least Yunho won’t let you down on this! He opens the door and-
“Y/N—”
“Yeosang-”
If you’d have to visualize awkwardness and uncomfortable silence- Here you got it!
You don’t know how long you both just stare at each other as if time had stopped. Do you even breathe?
“Y/N!” someone shouts. Wooyoung. The moment you notice it’s him, he already wraps his arms around you in a welcoming hug. “You came!”
“I did!” you grin, a bit uncomfortable, but not because of the tight hug.
“And you brought something to drink!” he pulls the bottle from your hand.
“Absacker.”
“A-what??”
“Just something to drink after dinner. Commonly referred as an Absacker.”
“Aah! Why don’t you just say that! Does it have to be cooled?”
“You can, but you don’t have to.”
“We gonna keep it cool then.” he turns on his heels and leaves “Taking this to the freezer and you two finally greet each other as the friends you are from years ago.”
A snorting giggle escapes you, as you look at Yeosang- His very perplex blinking eyes on his friend. “Wooyoung is upfront.” he mumbles.
“Quite upfront.” you half suppress. It’s just ridiculous. Yeosang turns at you and as he sees you, he has to chuckle as well.
“It’s good to see you.” he opens his arms and you greet each other with a hug. “Since when are you back?”
“Uh- Since a little while.” you end the hug. Focusing on talking and not on how warm his body feels or how good he smells. Damn, he smells good... Like- good.
“Are you here on vacation?”
“No I- I live here. I’m living in Seoul again.”Surprise! Now don’t let me tell you I’ve been here for a year!
“Ohh-” his eyes big. His lips formed to a smile. The perplex but genuine happy one. You know that one.
Have you ever seen a packed dinner table? Now imagine it with a shit-ton amount of Soju and your bottle of ‘ commonly revered Absacker’ shortly empty after dinner ended. Your gift was received with joy, as they started the first round of drinking games with it.
It’s been a while since you participated in those and- Damn! You defenitly forgot how good they are. Well- Fairly, you are not alone with it. Yeosang rarely drinks and Hongjoong- Mister ‘I-produce-songs-you-can-party-to-but-the-only-thing-I-know-is-work’ are pretty much on the same level as you. The three of you exchange looks of terror before every next round: Who of you three is gonna lose this time? Every time one of you lost, you’d toast each other; Receiving a look of empathy and ‘sending strength to this falling soldier’.
You’re starting to lose track of the games. Plural! Several happening at this table. And you’re getting tired. So you pull out your phone and blame the person who’s responsible for this, sitting at the other end of the table.
>Neither merciful, nor trustworthy, Jeong Yun-ho...>
>??>
>Le door>
His gaze rising immediately with a cute and wide grin at you as he read it.
<You didn’t walk in alone, didn’t you?<
You crook your head to the side with a disappointing (pissed) grim face. Yunho laughs and grabs Mingis shoulder next to him, catching his attention and whispering something in his ear before he gets up to take a seat next to you.
You narrow your eyes as he takes place “You-” pointing a finger at him.
“Me.” he narrows his eyes as well and hits your finger with his pointy finger. “En guarde-!”
You both laugh like he just made the greatest joke in history. To be fair: You are drunk. Everyone on this table is drunk.
“You having a good time?”
“You guys are brutal with those games.” you exhale exhausted. “If I keep up with you, I think I’m too lazy to get home after this.”
“You can sleep at one of ours. We’ll have a free bed for you.”
“Really? I don't want to bother.”
“You are no bother! San will definitely sleep somewhere else or he’ll tear someone with him, so that is one bed.”
“Thank you.” you sigh relieved. You really didn’t want to go home and miss everything tonight. You had missed them. You had missed, this: Wooyoung yapping over Jongho, who pushes back as well. Hongjoong randomly biting Mingis arm, San singing a song from a soap-opera with a head as red as a street light, leaned against Seonghwa who holds a staring duel with Yeosang.
“Or you could sleep at Yeosangs.” he pulls you from your thoughts.
“Yunho.” you warn.
“To us, you’re Yeosangs.” he whispers in your ear all giddy.
“Would you stop-!” you shove him, but he only laughs.
“You both really are the same amount of oblivious. It’s incredible.”
“I’m not oblivious!”
“Right. Sorry.” he places a hand on your shoulder “You’re a river in Egypt.”
Did I come here just to get bullied? You reach out to smack his arm, but he catches your hand mid air and stares you down. “Jeong Yun-ho...”
“Yah! Yah, Y/N!” the distinctive call of a Song Mingi.
“Yah! What up, Mingi!” you call back, looking over to him.
“Don’t snatch my best friend!” he grins.
“Ain’t snatching anything from you, princess!” you throw a kiss towards him. (Maybe you are more drunk than you thought.)
He gets up and walks over to you as well. Of course calling him princess would summon him.
“You call me what?” he leans down, right in front of your face- Daringly biting his lower lip.
“I called you a princess, my little princess” you frame his face with both of your hands “Princess Minkiiii.”
Without another word, he pulls your chair back and picks you up. He picks you up! Using the moment of surprise to throw you on his back and carry you piggyback. Way surprised about the whole thing, you cling onto him- “Dude-! Since when are you so buff!”
“I’m strong since birth! I’m a strong guy!”
“You were a fucking toothpick, dude!”
“Yeah-?” Oh you dared him with that. He tightens the grip on you and starts running and jumping around with you still (!) on his back.
“Song MinGIIIII-!”
Yeosang hasn’t noticed that he broke the staring-duel with Seonghwa a while ago. As he noticed Mingi walking over to you as well, he had to see. Seonghwa didn’t say anything, just kept eye between Yeosang and the scene he was watching unfold: You, cradling Mingis face before he picked you up and you two seemed to have a lot of fun, while Yunho recorded it on his phone. Yeosang knows you guys are friends too and he knows Mingi and Yunho long enough to know their intentions, but-- … But what if- Well it’s been a long time since and he never told the others really and---
Seonghwa keeps watch, waits to spot anything in Yeosangs frozen face, so fixed on this scene. Chest tense, just as his breathing, eyes not wide nor mad- but turning more and more deep every second passing. Eventually, Seonghwa fills two glasses with Soju, placing them right in front of Yeosang with a louder than necessary sound. Finally Yeosang snaps out from watching you and looks at Seonghwa, before he looks at the filled glasses.
“You lost about two to three minutes ago.”
“Oh- … Are you drinking with me?”
“No.” he flicks his tongue. “One for defeat. One for courage.”
Yeosang stares at the glasses until he understands which defeat and which courage he means. As he does, he quietly, but sharply exhales and picks up defeat, chugging it down. A warm burning in his throat. He picks up courage, looking over to you, Mingi and Yunho once more, before he meets Seonghwas gaze again. Then stares at the glass again. “Courage.” mumbling to himself and chugs it down as well.
Somehow courage burns more than defeat. But not as much as his whole body overall seems to burn. If he wouldn’t know any better, he’d think he’s either shaking or set on fire. And there is only one way to extinguish or at least get it under control. He stands up- Mistake! His legs more wobbly than he thought they’d be. Seonghwa stabilizes him with a grip at his arm. The way he stares up at him says it all; But since Yeosang drank said courage, he’s gonna do it! He starts walking towards you, Mingi and Yunho, reaches you three- And keeps walking...
#2#
The bathroom door shuts and locks behind him “Arghh! Get it together, Yeosang.” he huffs and ruffs his hair, feeling his surroundings spin “Ohhh, I’m drunk. Why did I drink when she’s here? Why is she here? Why did they not tell me?!” he rests his forehead against the cold tiles. Rewinding it all in his head to the moment he opened the door and saw you again for the first time in years. Your eyes widened by surprise- (Sparkling?) “So beautiful” he sinks down and takes place on the floor “Uhh you’re so beautiful…”
The last time you had seen each other, he didn’t know that it would be the last time. You had broken the news for the job at a come together like today. But he hadn’t thought you would leave so shortly after it.
His brows furrow and eyes narrow as he remembers how he’d been then. How he had slowly distanced himself from you even before the news. He can’t even remember the last messages you two exchanged- Only that you eventually didn’t answer anymore. Or was it him? He sighs as he realizes it does sounds more like him. (It was him.)
Why? Oh well, just look at him: Staring into a not existing distance as he thinks back to the moment he opened the door for you. The moment you two hugged each other- His hands feeling your back under his again. His hands grazing over his arms in memory, as if they’d try to find your touch again. He doesn’t of course. But something else finds him. It grazes his nose and his eyes snap wide. The faint scent of you, barely lingering on his clothes. He rapidly pulls the fabric of his shirt, bringing it to his nose and inhales. Inhales deep.
It’s there. Barely, but your scent is there. He keeps inhaling- seeking to grasp it for longer and more than the faint hint he catches of you.
Eventually it’s gone and he realizes what he just did for an unknown amount of time. Again, he stares into nothingness, a little shocked, you could say. “What am I doing?” he slowly runs his fingers through his hair before rubbing the back of his neck “I’m drunk. Yeah, I’m just really drunk.” his head falling back against the tiles again.
This is it. You needed a break! You couldn’t hold up with their games anymore. Rules? Which rules? “You learn while you’re at it” they say but there wasn’t happening anything anymore, except loud bantering, yapping and whatsoever chaos. Therefore you sneaked into the hallway, heading for the bathroom just around the corner and- “Argh!” pumping into someone once more.
“Y/N, are you okay?” you hear before seeing him.
You’re asking Me? “I bumped into You.” you nod, seeing Yeosangs surprised and worried face right before you. His arms reached out, like he wants to stabilize you. “I’m good, just running from another drinking game.”
“Another one?” he sighs “I didn’t want to drink so much today but I think I’m past that…”
“Yeah, I’m also past the part where I’d confidently go home.”
“You shouldn’t go on your own.”
“I won’t. Yunho said I could stay, so I’m gonna do that.”
“You sleep in Yunhos bed??”
“Whichever is free, I guess. He said San would probably sleep somewhere else or so-;”
“Ahh…” he exhales, before grabbing the back of his neck. “I- I would have offered to drive you, but I can’t do that after drinking.”
Really? “You can drive me home tomorrow.” are you flirting? “If you want to and your schedule-”
“I’ll drive you tomorrow.”
Oh, that was surprisingly easy. And even tho he didn’t let you finish your sentence, you heart skipped a beat about it. Why is that? Those aren’t some old feelings of yours, Y/N, that are sparking up right now, right?
“Well- Since we both seem to need a little breather- What do we say we clink ourselves out for a bit?” Like we used to?
For a moment you don’t know if you should have asked him. He blinks, surprised, perplex even. But then a smile draws on his lips. He does remember those times too. “I’ll get something to eat, wait here.”
He disappears around the corner you came from and you take the moment and check yourself in the bathroom. The night definitely progressed. So has your hair and make-up. You ‘fix’ what you can fix and as you step out the bathroom- “Argh-!” Almost bump into him once more.
“Maybe I should wear a collar with a bell, so I’m warning everyone when I move.”
“You can bump into me anytime.”
“What-?” you look at him questioning, seeing his ears heating up.
“Uuh-” he rubs the back of his neck, before remembering the bag of some sweet snack in his hand. “It’s not much but we got more in our apartment.”
“Right, this one’s from Hongjoong, Woo and Jongho.” I wonder what his and Yunhos apartment looks like.
“It’s just two floors higher.”
“Let’s go then.”
Yunhos and Yeosangs apartment has the same layout with the kitchen, living room and balcony outside. Which he presents:
“This is the living room with the couch and TV. There are consoles to play on TV. As to it can be noted.” he akwardly gestures around “This is our kitchen where Yunho is cooking. I’m not really allowed to do anything here without surveillance. Sometimes I do it anyways.”
“Oh what a bad boy you are, Yeosang.” you can’t keep that comment to yourself. “Cooking without surveillance as you are in your twenties.”
He looks at you with this ‘Yeosang-tese’-look as you call it: slightly to highly confused, flustered, awkward, happy to be here.
“I- I can’t tell if you’re joking right now.”
“Really?”
“Y-Yeah?”
“You are a great cook, Sangie.” you say, with the most sincere voice and face. Three seconds where you look at each other, and then burst out in laughter together.
It is warm outside. The difference between the AC inside and the warmth outside is Something. You sit on two chairs next to each other, two cans of soda and some more snacks between you on the floor- Taking in the relative quiet of a night in Seoul for a while. Cars passing by in distance, the dim street lights. You can’t hear the rest of the group two floors below. This building has some real good insulation.
“I can’t remember the last time we sat together like this.” he eventually says after a few minutes.
“Don’t make me think about it or I will feel old.”
“Old isn’t bad. You grow with age.”
“Did you grow?” you turn you head towards him “Apart from your muscle mass.” it’s so dark but from his shy chuckle you know that his face and ears are heating up.
“I hope I have.” he looks over to you for a moment, before turning his gaze back to scan the buildings you can see from the balcony. You hear his breath hitch- Inhaling sharply- See him nervously intertwining his fingers. You don’t say anything. Whatever he wants to say, he’ll get there on his own. And eventually- “I’m- I’m really sorry I didn’t talk to you- responded anymore.”
It means something to him, you can hear it. He looks at you, trying to scan your face as you hold your gaze onto the distance. You should be touched about it, glad or relieved-! But you don’t feel anything about his words. Are you mad? Still?
“I won’t lie, it did hurt my feelings, but-” it’s what I intended to happen. “Well, it’s something that happens as you grow older. Friends move away and they become strangers over time. Doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t care about them- They are just not part of your life anymore and neither are you in theirs.”
“Am I a stranger now?” This gets you to look at him. Not saying anything, your face hard to read in the dark. I want to be a part of your life, Y/N, like before. What did I miss in all that time? When did you think of me? Did you think of me at all?
“I don’t know.” you admit, glancing at him for a moment. “It’s- Sitting here with you feels like no time has ever passed.” you look away into the night again “While at the same time I know how I have changed and am not the same person anymore who used to sit next to you.”
“Hmm” he starts thinking about it. Trying to find the right words for what he thinks and feels-; Eventually, a deep exhale escaping him. “You’re so good at expressing your feelings.”
“I assure you, I’m not.”
“You can express them. I still haven’t really learned that.”
“You do can express them, you’re just more thorough with which words you choose for it.”
Yeosangs eyes narrow. You are just as thorough as I am, but you always find the better words. Those that linger on my tongue but can’t let out. And even those that I have not come to find yet. How do you do that, Y/N?
“So- What’s your thinking? Do I feel like a stranger?” You have to ask.
“No.”
“You sure?”
“You are here. We talk on the same level we used to-”
“Do we?” you interrupt, crooking your head skeptical “You’re drunk, and yet still so tense.”
“Ahh-” he grabs the back of his neck. You’re right. “I- didn’t know you’d be here.”
“It’s not like I just came here 10 minutes ago.” not holding back that push. “They didn’t tell you?”
“No.” Everyone knew except me.
They were able to hold this back? “Bastards! I ran into them on Wednesday!”
“Ah! Right, they went out that day. I wanted to go with them but had a photoshoot.”
Thank god he did. You don’t want to imagine how awkward it would have been seeing him right on the streets.
“Ah, well- I ran into you anyway.” you chuckle.
“What?”
“As you came out the bathroom, I ran into you.” you remind.
“Not forgetting that.” he chuckles.
“Yeah, well on Wednesday I didn’t see them as I left the restaurant and literally bumped into San and Mingi.” best way to hide a lie, is within some truth.
“How did you miss them? They’re big dudes.”
“Mingi might be taller,” dem big chest! “But you and San are quite similar from your physique.”
You hear him blush. “Thank you.” Proudly. “I put a lot of work into it.”
“Doesn’t surprise me.”
“How come?”
“When you want something, you’re very persistent. More a quiet persistence, than others, that will tear down a wall being impatient about it. You are patient. Sometimes a little too much. But you’re not letting go of something no matter how difficult it seems to achieve. You know you want it and therefore you will.” you halt as you consider what sits on your tongue. You sigh and continue “I don’t think I told you, but I really admired that about you. I still do.”This is so cringe, Y/N...
Yeosang wouldn’t agree if he’d hear your thoughts. His ears heat up, just like his chest. He looks over to you, as you still gaze into the distance to avoid any eye-contact.
Why don’t you look at me? “You never told me.”
“Hmhm.” you feel his eyes piercing on you.
Look at me. “How come now?”Look at me...
“I-” you give up and give him a glance. Shrug your shoulders before looking away again “Just trying to catch up on some stuff.” Because I don’t know how or if you and I can become friends again as we used to. Even though we didn’t talk for years- Even if more years like that will be upon- I want you to know that no matter what happens, no matter how invisible you sometimes believe you are, that you are one very admirable person, Yeosang. And I don’t think you’re aware of the actual amount of strength you have, even tho you’re already using it.
That’s not all you’re telling. “I like that.” he takes both soda cans and hands you yours to take “Catching up then.”
You smile and take your can before ‘clinking’ it against his. “To catching up.”
#3#
After another moment of silence between you -taking in the night, you do start catching up on some stuff. You tell him some stories from abroad, and him also some stories abroad, while on tour, just like some from at home. You both hear those stories, for the first time, but it feels like you had always kept in touch about those during the time that passed.
Eventually, you hear the melody from the frontdoor, indicating that someone entered the apartment. You both snoop inside -still hidden in the outside dark. It’s Yunho, tiredly walking towards the fridge. Tilting, then scratching his head in confusion. “That was his soda.” Yeosang explains and you press your lips on another to not laugh. The tall confused sighs and grabs something else from the fridge, before disappearing to his room. “That was my smoothie he took.” he sounds shocked. Your hand slaps on your mouth, containing the laughter. “That was my smoothie, Y/N.” he sounds sad.
“Well, we took his sodas, Yeosang.”
“Still…” he pouts.
“Since when do you grudge when drunk?”
“Tired And drunk.” Are we even drunk anymore? He checks the time on his phone, exhaling even more tired before showing it to you.
“Ehw- Good morning.” you frown. “We should sleep.”
“Yeah…” You both tidy up and get inside.
“You got a blanket somewhere maybe?” you nod towards the couch.
He follows your look, before turning perplex back at you. “You’re not sleeping on the couch.”
“Where else? You wanna run through the other apartments and check which bed is free?”
“Mine’s free. I take the couch.”
Oh. ... “Yeo-”
“I can sleep on my own couch for a night.”
“… … …” you give up, you’re too tired. “I said you were persistent, didn’t I?” you sigh and he smiles proudly “Okay.”
The two of you stroll to his room, where he gets some comfortable clothes for himself and you. You change in his room, while Yeosang does in the bathroom. You’d like to look around, but honestly you are too tired for that. Therefore, after you changed, you just head to the bathroom to wish him goodnight. The door leans open, Yeosang is leaned over the sink, washing his face. His hair fixed back with some hair-clips and- Shit… This well fitting black tank-top really-- Damn. Gets you awake.
His arms are big. Have they been this big before too? Did you not notice the veins on his lower arms? His strong and slender hands?
As he dries his face he notices you. Something in his look making you stutter “I- I-” Don’t look at his chest don’t look at his defined chest oh my god what is wrong with me. “I just- wanted to say goodnight.”
The judge(ing mal)tese stares. Nothing needs to be said for you to understand. “I guess not.” you sigh and shuffle inside, as he hands you a toothbrush with toothpaste on, along with placing a package of wet-tissues in front of you, to clean your face.
You brush your teeth as he applies creame and oils on his face- working and massaging them in with care. As you are done, you wipe your face, before washing it in the sink as well. (Wipes are not enough, according to him…). While drying your face, a big yawn escapes you. Yeosang pulls a little stool from the side and pushes your shoulder down to flop down on it.
“Am I not done yet?” you whine.
“No.” he takes a cream and gently starts applying it on your skin. “You need to take care of that beautiful face.”
He didn’t notice he said that. But you did.
“Yeosang thinks I’m beautiful, hm?” you ask, and his hands halt at the side of your face. His ears turning hot- eyes widening; But as he notices your soft smile- So sweet and gentle-; The panic, which was just rising- gone instantly. His features turning soft.
Yes, I do.
You don’t know what you’re gonna think about that tomorrow. For now, you close your eyes and let him apply the cream. As it feels like he’s done, you want to stand up, but he places a hand on your shoulder again.
“I’m tired as hell, Yeosang…” you whine once more. Too tired to care for the tone of your voice.
“Me too.”
You sigh exhausted. “Just so you know, I’m only enduring this because you called me beautiful and because of your flawless skin.”
He chuckles with a wide grin you don’t see. “Good g-” and presses his lips on another. You didn’t hear it! Realizing that, a smug grin forms on his lips as he keeps massaging the cream onto your skin. Good girl.
His hands leave your face and you open your eyes again, spotting that very grin. “What are you grinning about?”
Your submissiveness. “Nothing.” the grin not leaving his lips.
#4#
After saying goodnight, Yeosang fell onto the couch. You fell into Yeosangs bed. Both of you asleep in an instant. A dreamless night.
You wake up on your own. The room almost dark. A stray of light sneaking in under the blinds. Head not feeling as bad as you thought it would. That’s good. And even better- This bed is reeeally comfortable. You stretch like a cat and roll on the other side, getting even more comfortable. Your phone lies right in front of you on the mattress. Too comfortable to check the time, until the screen lights up, signaling the income of a message.
<Good morning
are you awake?
I’m downstairs for a few minutes.
Will be back<
Right, you remember. He wanted to drive you home. Apparently, he didn’t forget about it. Means: You have to get up. Ughh… You grumble at the thought of it. This bed is too comfortable to leave! But you have stuff to do today as well. Cleaning your apartment and doing the laundry. The never ending tasks of adulthood: Why is there always laundry? Why is there always dust? Why are there always dishes? (Well, you got the luxury of a dishwasher but still!)
No matter how much you wanna stay in this bed, you get up, make the bed and change into your clothes from yesterday. You don’t see a laundry bin in his room, therefore you just but the clothes at the end of the bed. Opening the blinds, you almost go blind -it’s too bright outside; And as you check the mirror, you believe something in your vision must have been destroyed by the sun, because: Your skin looks amazing! Not as amazing as Yeosang but- like- Your face-It looks so good-! “What the fuck--?”
Whatever oils and creams Yeosang put on your face last night: You need this stuff asap!
The rest of the apartment is quiet. Yunho seems to be still asleep. “Look at that. Didn’t I say you could sleep at Yeosangs?” or not.
You turn around and see one tall stupidly grinning Yunho -joggers, T-Shirt and ruffled hair, leaned against the kitchen counter with a hot steaming mug in his hand.
No words, but rolling your eyes, before you point towards the couch, where a neatly folded blanket lays.
Yunho raises curious eyebrow. “You two slept on the couch?”
“He did.”
His grin instantly gone. Only disappointment in his face. “There was only one bed and he chose the couch?”
“I wanted to stay on the couch, but he wouldn’t let me.”
“Even worse!” he rolls his eyes with a deep sigh.
“Now that we’re interrogating: Why don’t you tell me why Yeosang didn’t know I’d show up yesterday?”
Calmly -smug as hell, he takes a sip from his mug “Honestly, I’m surprised everyone could shut it that long.”
Are you fucking serious? “Jeong Yun-Ho!”
“Y/LN/ Y/N.”
The melody of the frontdoor sings as Yeosang enters the apartment again. You two meet his gaze, as confusion arrives in his features.
“Morning.” nods Yunho.
“Good- morning.” Yeosang sounds unsure what he stumbled into.
“Hey.” you wave, kind of awkward.
Yeosangs eyes switch between you and Yunho, before eventually staying on you. “I- got your jacket and bag” he holds them up in his hands “They were still downstairs.”
“Oh, thank you.” you had completely forgotten about it.
“I’ll get my gym-bag and then we can drive- If you-”
“Yeah sure.”
Why the hell is this so awkward? Silently communicating with Yunho via mimic, as you wait for Yeosang to get his stuff from his room
As he’s finally back, you say your goodbye to Yunho and after a relatively quiet elevator drive, you find yourself in a new black KIA Ceed with tinted windows.
“Nice car you got.” you note as he drives out of the underground parking.
“It’s a rental. Mine is at the shop and haven’t come to pick it up yet.”
“Oh, for a check-up or-?”
“Inspection.”
“Ah.” you nod, now very curious. “So which car does Yeosang drive?”
“A CLA 180.”
“Mercedes.” Expensive!
“Not what you expected?”
“No, I think it suits you. Mercedes is more elegant, graceful.”
“San said something similar when I was thinking which to pick.”
“You were choosing between two?”
“Three, actually. All also Mercedes.”
“Oh! Now, what did San say to the others?”
“To the GT 63 he said it’s too much of a sports-car and I’m not the person for that but rather-” he nods in your direction “for something elegant.”
“Good feedback of him.” you nod approving “And which was the other?”
“A G-class, but wasn’t sure which one.”
“The fuckboy car?”
“The-” he gasps with wide eyes. Quickly and shocked glancing over to you. “It’s not a fuckboy car.”
“It iiis.” you tease for a few seconds, before letting him off that hook. “Okay the one I’m thinking of should be considered an oldtimer now, I don’t think you’d have gotten that one.” you stretch your arms before soo casually looking at him, throwing the next hook. “But what do I know! Have you become a fuckboy, Yeosang?”
He gasps again, surprised and perplex, ears red as hell as you withhold a laugh “I- I don’t know. I don’t think so??”
“So-- you’re not having anyone around who thinks you are dating them or anything else?”
“Well, you know how idols are-”
“Of course, of course.” you nod, rolling your eyes amused. “You all are the idols by the book of idols, abstinent and celibate while always everly desirable.” The perfect crush.
He chuckles ”Now why is a G-class a fuckboy car? Did you go out with someone who had that car?"
“No,” you start but correct yourself as you remember. “No wait there was this one guy, but we were just on one date.”
“It didn’t work out?”
“No. He was kind of snobbish; But the car and everything how he presented himself didn’t feel-” you try to think of a fitting word
“Like Him. Not authentic.”
“Yeah! More like a show for everyone around him. Which- Of course you can show off, but like you said, it didn’t feel like him.”
“Hm” he hums understanding. “So he didn’t corrupt your view on a G-class.”
“No, that comes from a character, who does drive this vehicle and is the absolute worst that has ever come to exist in fiction. Handsome and very charming and I fall for it everytime but just the worst. Very well written character. Horrible person tho.”
Let’s ignore the horrible person part. “So this car would show that I am handsome and charming.”
“The 180 does that job too. Besides, you don’t need a car for that.”
He smiles quiet, little and happy. “So Y/N thinks I’m handsome and charming.”
Yes I do.“You can be.” Your teeth biting your lower lip with a grin, as you fumble the fabric of your bag in your lap. Even tho it was late and both of you had been really tired- None of you forgot about that moment.
“You need to take care of that beautiful face.”
“Yeosang thinks I’m beautiful, hm?”
Flirting isn’t very friend-ish. No it’s not. Not in the way you two are at it. Both of you blushing in your seats. Hearts twirling. A flustered grin on both your faces. With Yeosang not making it more platonic.
“Ah- Shouldn’t you have taken that turn earlier?”
“Just a quick stop.” he pulls to the side in a free parking spot. “One minute.” he smiles assuring and leaves the car.
“O-kay?” you watch him as he jogs into a small alley between two restaurants. There is a chalkboard-sign with an arrow showing into the alley- something writing atop of it. You can’t read it since there are two people blocking the view for the moment, until they finally step aside and you can read: ‘Breakfast & Lunch to Go’
The moment you read the sign, Yeosang comes out of the alley, a paper-bag in one hand and a cup-holder with two cups in the other.
Yeah… You remember again how damn easy it was to fall for him.
You reach over and take everything from his hands, so he can easily get in the car. “Thank you.”
“What is this?”
He shakes the strands falling in his face back in place “We didn’t have much at home for breakfast, so-” he explains with a smile.
Oh yeah you remember damn well how easy it was. You could kiss him right now for that. Just on the cheek- But you’re not doing that. You know how he is with physical touch. And you don’t want to make the wrong impression.
“Thank you, Yeosang.” it comes from your heart. From this moment right now. And maybe also the version of you from years ago, before you left.
Yeosang drops you off at your apartment -heading to the gym. You, get home with your breakfast.
As the door to your apartment closes behind you, you need a moment. This evening did not go as you thought it would. You didn’t want to go actually. You take everything off- remembering how you silently screamed and huffed before leaving because you just didn’t want to go. Scared it would get awkward and you’d excuse yourself after two hours of polite attendance, saying you’d feel a little tired. Then get home and maybe cry because the realization hit that you had become a stranger to them, as they to you.
But none of that had happened last night. You drank with them together. Goofed around. Yeosang let you sleep in his bed- “Oh shit, right-” you remember and pull out your phone to text him.
>Btw I couldn’t find a laundry bin, so I just put the clothes you lend me on the bed...>
<The chair at my work-desk is my laundry bin 😐<
> 😅 Good to know!
Thanks again, for driving me home.^^ >
<Any time <
#5#
You put the phone aside and start with what you are meant to do: household…
The earphones blast random on your favorite songs playlist. The laundry is running, the kitchen is cleaned, as suddenly HALAZIA by ATEEZ starts playing. It’s really good, you haven't listened to it for some time. You are so happy that they have grown so much in all this time. Again, just like then, you feel that ache in your chest. Clenching from the inside- sentimental and proud. Until you hear Yeosangs part. That deep hum of his, followed by his dark raspy voice-; And you feel something else clench.
“Wow.” you pull the earphones off. No no no no no nu-uh! “Maybe I should listen to something else.” and play the first podcast you find instead.
At the gym, Yeosang focuses on his workout. Headphones on. Warming up by working with his body-weight. Focusing on keeping his position steady while planking. Not thinking of you or anything, not at all. Not how you were staring at his arms, when he was washing his face. (Yeah, he saw that). Or how you were desperately trying to not look at his torso as he wore that black tank-top. Or your little sighs, which sounded like whines, after you had flopped down so obediently on the little stool...
Planks aren’t distracting enough anymore, he switches to push-ups. While at it, he doesn't think of you wearing his clothes- No, not at all. Or that you were sleeping in his bed last night. Or the moment he caught your scent on his shirt; You, texting him -although he knew, that those clothes are on his bed. Him, almost biting through his lip, to just pack his bag and leave that folded pile as it is. You, blushing and biting your lip when admitting you find him handsome and charming.
Shit-- He halts mid push-up. His chest heaving- A pearl of sweat dripping from his nose. Feeling how he’s getting hard. “Seriously?” he whisper hisses to himself and tries to find something that- Oh! That one deeply horrendous aegyo of Wooyoung. Something he will sadly never forget and if unfortunate, will have to experience again at an unsuspected moment. That face he makes… That voice. A shower of disgust runs over his back. But-! He immediately feels himself softening again. Works every time.
He keeps thinking of Wooyoungs aegyo. Just every few moments, to be safe. But he just can’t keep you out of his mind. Not during his workout. Not on the drive back. Not back at the apartment- taking a shower, where it’s just soo tempting to let those thoughts about you win.
No. No! He’s tired! He’ll just do his usual routine and then take a nap -in the bed you slept. Just resting a bit more -in his bed where you slept. Just laying down on the mattress, where you were laying. The bathrobe loosely bound, not in the mood to change into something else.
But, another bummer! His pillow suddenly feels so uncomfortable to lie on. … But oh, this folded pile of clothes on his bed, looking just ideal to lay his head on. His eyes are fixed on the pile with the door to his room in the background. His eyes switching on both things. Nothing on his mind, and yet he’s thinking a lot. He feels a lot.
He locks the door without a thought. Doesn’t matter that Yunho’s not there anyway. He just- He just wants to rest. Dropping down on his bed once more. Resting his head on the clothes and starts scrolling through various apps, until the group-chat of ATEEZ pops up. One time with sending a bunch of photos and second time with a few videos. He wipes the notifications away, until-
Mingi <We gotta invite her to a group chat asap!!<
Hongjoong <Make a new one, please 🙄 <
Seonghwa <Another one? 😩 <
Yeosang checks the sent data in the chat. The photos are all from last evening. Showing them all, including you, who Mingi is speaking off.
Mingi <You all missed her just as I did!<
Woo <I think one of us missed her most 👀<
San <Me!<
Mingi <Yeah, me!<
Jongho < A solar system can only have one sun<
Mingi <???<
San <You meant ‘San’ right?<
Yeosang rolls his eyes and deactivates the WiFi- taking a look at the photos and videos without any more disturbances.
*!*
Those are some good pictures! Some blurred, but that only shows what a good come together it was. You laugh in several photos, sometimes you look confused, sometimes hyped- Gosh you’re so cute...
His breath hitches and he presses his thighs together. This time tho, he doesn’t stop it.
Is he really that desperate? Does he want you that much?
He watches the videos. Maybe skipping a few, until he finds the one he is looking for. As he finds it, his breath sharpens. The moment Yunho had filmed, as you cradled Mingis face, calling him ‘Princess Minki’ before he pulled you up on his back. Your grip on him- A strong grip. And you laugh at each other, having so much fun together…
He throws his phone to the side. Frustrated. Lying on his back, staring at the ceiling, his hand loosening the bathrobe which has somehow become too tight-; His hand staying at his abdomen. His mind replaying that moment of you, sitting on the stool. Your eyes closed. So trusting. So submissive. To him. To Me. Grazing your face- Your lips so beautiful- Whining tiredly, because of him- Because of Me.
He turns his head to the side. His nose grazing against the fabric that clothed your skin last night. It’s there. Your scent. And so much more present, than that hint that was left on Yeosangs shirt. Ohh… He inhales deeply. Taking in as much as his lungs can store. “Just a little-” he whispers, tells himself although he knows it won’t be a little more. One hand grasping the fabric and bringing it to to his nose- The other, wandering from his abdomen, down to his now hardened length. Sloowly stroking- Oh dear...
Your scent taking over his mind. Imagining how you are beneath him- your hands holding tight onto his arms, breath all shaky, your body trembling, soft exhausted whines escaping your mouth- all because of him. “Hhrgh-” he rumbles, inhaling with every stroke. Imagining you, sitting on the stool beneath him. His hands resting at the side of your face- “Yeosang thinks I’m beautiful, hm?” “Yes I do-” he whispers, smiles as he remembers that smile of yours. Oh how much he wanted to kiss you then. How much he wanted to cradle your face- Grab your waist and press you against him- “Arhh-” His strokes turning firmer- Catching the precum and spreading it all over his dick with every further stroke.
If this wouldn’t have been the first time you’d seen each other again- Oh what he would have done… But because it was the first time-; Imagining last night differently. Both of you in his bed. Him, cradling your face- pulling you in for a kiss.
His hand lets go of the fabric and runs up his torso, over his chest, up to his neck -imagining it was your hand that needed him closer.
Your lips- Oh my god he just knows they feel so good. That you taste so good. His tongue playing with yours, before seeking- needing, to kiss every inch of you. Traveling along your neck- kissing, tasting your skin-; Wandering down your sternum, finding your breasts- Licking over one nipple before taking it between his teeth. You, whining, your back arching under his touch. “Y/-N”
His breath fastening- desperate, needy strokes turning harder and faster. Oh the sounds you’d make for him… How your walls would feel around his fingers- clenching warm, drenching wet, deliciously, as his lips and tongue would please your clit. Oh how you’d whine for him. Your hands grasping onto his hair- “Fuck, Love-” Your breaths turning into hasty whines under him- His breaths turning hasty- whiny.
He presses the fabric against the lower half of his face with urgency. It’s drenched from his hot breath, but he doesn’t care. He wants you. He wishes you were here so fucking badly, that he licks against the fabric and sucks in deeply the scent of you sticking to it. His abdomen tightening as well- he is so close. Not able to last long just thinking of you. Oh dear how much he’d wanna see you cum. Feel you cum- Hear you! Your hands clinging onto him- digging into his skin, your whines turning into the sweeties cries as his fingers curl inside- “Come for me-” he cries against the fabric, stroking hard, harder. “Come all over me, my good g-- Hrhh--!”
His release spills over his torso. His hand slowly stroking, to get the last bit of it.
It takes a moment. As he’s done, his hand just stops and rests on his wet, sticky dick. With every breath his mind clears more and more. More and more realizing, that his feelings towards you changed.
He still remembers his panic back then when he realized that you -any message, any call, had become the highlight of his day. That he couldn’t stop thinking about you. That your smile was the most beautiful thing he had seen. He felt so proud whenever he had made you laugh. And yet, it had terrified him.
But now, all this fear is gone. When did that happen? During the time you were away? Or- The moment he opened the door, seeing you in front of him? Yeah. In that moment he knew it. Instantly and definitely: I want you. I want you to be mine. I want to be yours.
********
>> Part 2 >>
********
A/N: Yeosang.... Yeosang. Yeosang.... This man is such a secret-sleeper agent when it comes to wrecking your biases. I can't deny- I am smitten by this man.
Yunho (still my fav, still bias IDK! WHY THEY ALL SO *gnaws on desk*) became my best man for shipping Yeosang and Y/N. He can be a little shit sometimes and I love that for him!
Pairing: Vampire!Yeosang X Reader (inlcuding Vampire!ATEEZ)
Wordcount: 12k
Fic-Genre: Fantasy, Mystery
Story: You work as something of a babysitter for a whole bunch of vampires for several months now. Only this night, is a little bit different. A new discovery, which brings you closer to Yeosang, who seems to have an interest in you, neither you or him want to reckon.
Warnings: mentions of blood of course, and feeding on humans
Inspo & GIFsource: GIFs by @heungversion
A/N: A vampire fanfic? Of course! Have you seen the economy!
********
In summer the nights are much shorter. They get nervous during that time, since they only got roughly about 7 hours of darkness. Only a few hours to be outside. To hunt. They can stay up during the day, but not in daylight. And even in darkness, staying up during the day takes a lot of their strength. They will eventually start bleeding from the exhaustion through nose and ears. Kind of ironic, that those beings that hunt for blood, can bleed as well. Their pale skin would let one suggest that they have not a single drop left in their body. That’s why they hunt for it, don’t they-? Because those dead creatures, doomed to live at night for eternity, lack what brings a body life: Blood.
The place you are at, is a beautiful big house outside the city, with at least 500 meters nothing else around but trees. Far off from anything, but for sure no obstacle. For them, barely anything is an obstacle anymore; Not with their extraordinary senses. Especially their sense of smell with which they can smell their victim from far away. With their hyper-speed, they can catch it within seconds. With their strength, they can break their neck, their entire body, as easily as a toothpick. They could do all that to you as well too. There’s only one thing you have for your protection. A silver necklace, with a ruby pendant, laying around your neck since you took that job of being ‘something’ of a babysitter and dietitian for a bunch of vampires.
Every ‘shift’ starts the same. You get there one, sometimes two hours before the sun sets, to prepare everything. You check the house –the first and second floor, for anything out of place. If there would be, you’d take a photo and send it immediately to your employer, who is the only contact in your work-phone apart from the 8 vampires you take care of. You don’t know your employer by name. The contact is saved simply as ‘Employer’, while the vampires are simply named with an emoji: a compass 🧭 or Hongjoong, star ⭐ for Seonghwa, a dog 🐶 for Yunho, a crown 👑for Yeosang, a mountain 🏔️ for San, a wolf 🐺 for Mingi, a black cat 🐈⬛for Wooyoung and a bear 🐻 for Jongho.
Which is something you found quite ridiculous at first. But- even vampires arrive in the 21th century and use smartphones and emojis.
You don’t use your work-phone apart from from your job. Only to send Employer, the resent stats and occasionally sending one or two vampires a reminder that the sun is gonna rise soon. You’re sure everything you write or document gets monitored. Maybe even copied- mirrored on Employers phone. Not someone told you but- given the-- oddity of this job, you are certain.
Either way, after checking the house, you make your way to the kitchen and prepare 8 thermos cups. All of them with their individual mixture of blood. Not everyone likes just Type A, B, AB or 0... Some of them prefer it mixed 50:50, 10:40:50, some just a shot of one blood type... You have a whole excel document on your phone, with sheets for each of them, documenting everything, because sometimes they wanna try something a bit different and if they like it, it needs to be provided. Speaking of providing! The fridge needs to be stocked at all times. No blood should be wasted, therefore you need to check the inventory every time and send Employer how much there is left.
Also notable, important, and very 21th century: They all have their own personal thermos cup. No names on them, but differing in brand, color and decoration (stickers and such or the lack of it). You know them by now, but the second night you had been here you had accidentally mixed up two of the cups. Thankfully they had been of Wooyoung and Yeosang, who had taken it with humor. Otherwise, you might have lost your life then and there. Vampires are not to provoke when they wake up- especially not in the first shorter nights of the year.
After preparing everyones own cup, you bring them downstairs. The first door is in the hallway and opens the way to a flight of stairs to the lower level. It looks like a normal wooden door, but it’s heavier and also light-insulated. Downstairs comes a short corridor, looking like any normal basement with a boiler, an electric- and water meter and such. At the end of it is another door. It’s light and sound insulated. No light comes in there and no sounds comes out of it.
Funny thing about that door! It won’t open if the upper door isn’t shut. You still forget about that sometimes while juggling 8 big cups downstairs. Today you hadn’t forgotten about it, but you hadn’t pulled it completely shut. Therefore you had to walk it all up and down again, before entering their actual sleeping quarters for the day. They all have their own rooms on the second level of the house, which are less for sleeping in the bed that each of them has, but rather for everyone to have their own space.
The sleeping quarter is mostly dark. No big lights, only small warm ones on the walls- No decoration or such, except for the wall at the end of the room. A cut-out church-window, showing a symbol that looks like a compass with two additional lines drawn to connect East with South and West with North. The caskets they sleep in look rather modern and have a nightstand right next to each of them That’s where you place their thermos cups.
The caskets have no names on them either, only their arrangement shows who’s it is. The two under the window are from the eldest, Hongjoong, with Seonghwa to his right.At the right hand to the almighty.you think every time you place Seonghwas cup on the nightstand.
With some space under them, are the caskets from Yunho and Yeosang, but they don’t stand as close to another, as Hongjoong and Seonghwas. Under Yunhos and Yeosangs, follow the last four, on the same height: San, Mingi, Wooyoung and Jongho. The whole time you’ve been here, this arrangement has never changed and you don’t think it ever has.
After placing their cups on each their nightstands you leave for upstairs -the door closed shut. Since you already tidied up the literal bloody mess in the kitchen, you decide to make yourself comfortable and watch the sunset on the terrace. The big outdoor-couch is one of your favorite spots. The terrace is big and has a soft illuminated pool. You always wanted to take a swim there. You are allowed to. You can use the house, as long as you leave it as you found it. Except their own personal rooms. You are not allowed to use those.
Tonight would actually be a great night for a swim. The air is so soft and warm on your skin, but- “Ughh- I forgot my swimwear.” you realize frustrated before debating with yourself to just do it instead, naked. “But it’s only about 7 hours of night this time---” you huff, pondering “On the other hand- They will for sure make use of that little time and be back just before sunrise… Right?”
The pondering continues as you watch the sun meeting the horizon and disappearing behind it, finally. As the sun is gone and the sky turned dark, it doesn’t take long until you start hearing something from inside the house. Doors opening and shutting, moving air.
“Good evening-!” you speak a little louder while turning the page in the book you had brought. Raising your voice isn’t necessary, they can hear you perfectly fine.
Another fast movement of air and you hear a provoking slurping sound right next to you, before catching the hint of blood in your nose, with curious head peaking into your book over your shoulder. It’s Wooyoung, still in his comfortable sleeping clothes, slurping with a metal straw from his cup. “Don’t you wanna read something fun?”
“It interests me.” you answer monotone, trying to ignore him.
“I didn’t say it’s not interesting, just not fun.”
“Oh you read Goffman?”
“Goffman…” another voice joins- Both of you turning your heads to the open door leading inside. Hongjoong, strutting outside, already dressed in a fine black suit, a rose gold brooch on the knot of his tie, his hair combed into place; He empties the last bit from his cup, before licking the blood from his lips.
“You read it?” you follow him with your eyes.
“Too much in his head this man,” he places the cup on the coffee-table before the couch. “Just like our princess...”
Speak of the devil: You hear more from inside, but this time it’s a little louder. You don’t even need to guess, since you hear their telling laugh and giggles, as they wrestle each other -with vampire-speed through the house, on the first floor, the second floor, before suddenly hearing a big splash from the pool.
“I won!” yells Mingi (the princess) from the pool, his arms raised into air with a triumphant face.
The next movement of air and a fairly drenched San stands outside at the edge of the pool “You got lucky…” he huffs, pulling off the drenched T-Shirt before wringing it out. His toned, well defined upper body still surprising you. You’d always wondered what he had been in his previous life to look like this, since from your knowledge/guessing, vampires didn’t change when they turned. They stayed the same.
“I’ve always been the strongest.” calls Mingi confident “I don’t need luck!”
“How about we wait for Yeosang so everyone can see otherwise.” proposes Hongjoong with a confident -a bit lecturing, smile.
“Yeosang?” you sound certainly skeptical.
Although you had been working at this job for a year now, he was the one you knew the least. Yeosang is quiet. At first you thought he was reserved but actually -even as a vampire, he is still shy, and as polite as he is introverted. Very!
“Don’t underestimate him.” the next one joins the little gathering next to Hongjoong. Yunho, dressed fairly more fancy as well -an all black suit, the jacket casually over one shoulder. “Mingi and I might be the tallest but Yeosang is the strongest and fastest as well.”
“I am strong!” protest Mingi, still in the pool.
“I’m still strong!” protest San, marching towards Hongjoong und Yunho with broad shoulders.
“We are equally fast.” adds Wooyoung calmly between his slurps.
The grin on Hongjoongs face draws wider. His eyes switching between San and Mingi. “Why not test it then-?” he lays his head back “Yeosang-a!”
“He just showered, he won’t do it.” concludes Yunho casually, just before a phone sounds off the income of a message.
Hongjoong pulls out his phone and crooks his head with a sigh “I don’t wanna land in the pool and have to shower again.” he reads aloud the message, rolling his eyes. “You won’t have to if you’ll actually fight back, as you are very much capable of-!”
“Come on-!” shouts Wooyoung “Show Y/N how strong you are, she doesn’t believe it-!”
“I- I didn’t say-” you try to, but just before you can end your sentence Yeosang stands in the door-frame, only a black bathrobe wrapped around his body, his hair dripping.
The smell is slight, but you can sense his shampoo and showergel. It smells good. You had never paid much attention on it or him in that way but- He is just- You feel like ‘ethereal’ would be too much to call it, but you can’t find any other word to describe him. Even with the black bathrobe he is wearing; Even with his hair still wet- With every strand falling perfectly although it looks a little messy.
He had always been beautiful but today- It takes your breath away for a moment. Even makes your heart skip a beat.
The others notice and watch as you stutter “Ye- Yeosang I- I didn’t say I didn’t believe—”
“It’s alright.” Yeosang nods at you polite. His gaze staying longer than he had ever looked at you. Or maybe that is just your impression. You don’t look at him a lot either since he seems quite avoidant. Or maybe because he is too beautiful and or because he also often has this threatening gaze. Or maybe a bit of everything.
Finally, Mingi pushes himself out of the pool. His T-shirt and sweat-shorts sticking quite complimentary to his body. He pulls off his t-shirt off as well and throws it to the side. His torso- Damn what did they all do in their life before being a vampire to look like THAT?
“You know if you want to wrestle for real-” adds Wooyoung, slurping his cup empty, as it sounds.“You need to be naked and have olive oil all over your body.”
“Are you so thirsty today?” San raises a brow at him.
“That sounds slippery.” comments Yunho with a grin.
“Yeah! Like the Greeks!” supports Mingi.
“I’m not drenching myself in oil just for that.” Yeosang, monotone, annoyed.
“If not for this, then for what-?” Wooyoung, certainly curious.
Yeosang looks at them all, one by one as they wait for an answer to it. Instead, he rolls his eyes with a sighs “Ridiculous... I’m on my room.” and turns on his heels to walk back inside.
The moment he turned around, you guessed it would happen. And as you look at Mingi and see that smile drawing up on his face-; Your eyes rush back to Yeosang who just passed Hongjoong and Yunho- Those two stepping aside and opening the way for Mingi.
That vampire-speed is quite fast, but you catch glimpses of it: Within a blink Mingi rushed over to Yeosang and pulls at his arm. Yeosang -who definitely expected this- uses the strength of Mingis grip- pushing his weight into it and jumps on Mingis back; grabbing the other arm and fixating them both, before jumping with both feet against Mingis back- Bringing the taller vampire to the ground.
“Not your spider-monkey tricks! That ain’t wrestling for strength!” protests Mingi, face pressed against the stone floor.
“But launching at me from behind was?” Yeosangs voice sounding way too melodic -almost cheeky, as he keeps him fixated.
“Alright! Alright, guys!” waves Hongjoong, “One last match. You’ll do it right in front of us.”
As the eldest says, so they do. Hongjoong, San and Yunho now also taking place on the big couch, as you watch the other two getting into position right in front of you. Placing their hands on the other and waiting for the signal. Hongjoong raises his hand “Start in 3… 2… 1!”
They push against each other with sole strength. You can hear it in the air. The vibration of force against force. You even believe to hear something cracking. Not their bones. It is the stone floor under their feet. The five of you on the couch, locked in on the two. But none of them both budges.
Mingi crooks his head to the side. A teasing open mouth grin, with his fangs slowly growing out. “That it, Sangie?” Mingis voice drenched in ego. “I know you can’t do this for the whole night.”
“You’re right.” sighs Yeosang, agreeing. Still not budging.
“Because I am the strongest.”
“No,” Yeosangs head crocks to the side as a grin form on his lips “I just got better things to do with my time.” the stone-floor under him cracks once more, before he suddenly pushes Mingi on his back, easily, as if he could have done it the whole time. But he doesn’t stop there. He jumps on top of Mingis torso, knee pressing into his chest, while grabbing Mingis chin, forcing to look at him. “I think you lost.” he smiles, so cute and sweet, before standing up and walking inside as if nothing ever happened.
The others cheer. San praising all hyped, Yunho clapping giggly, while Mingi is still lying on the floor, quite frozen and perplex about his loss.
“You know he is older than you.” calls Seonghwa from the balcony on the second floor, casually leaning against the glass-balustrade.
“You, Joong and Yunho are also older than him and he’s still stronger! Doesn’t make sense!”
“Nothing in our existence makes sense, if you think about it.”
“This again…” sighs Mingi and disappears with a woosh inside.
“Ugh!” Wooyoung gets up as well and hooks his arm into Sans, pulling him with him as he walks inside “Y/N reading G-Offman and you, starting with this philosophy again!”
Oh, sensitive topic for them. you note.
“Hwa, my dear,” charms Hongjoong “I see you are dressed, why are you still up there?”
“Jongho’s nervous. Someone needed to calm him down.”
“Nervous?” scoffs Hongjoong “He has this immaculate voice for a hundred years and he is still nervous?”
“He respects every opera, no matter long it’s been.”
“Alright, alright…” he waves at him and Seonghwa gets back inside. Before you can even ask, Hongjoong turns to you “Jongho has an opera to attend and sing today.”
“He will be Tamino” adds Seonghwa, now standing in the door-frame. A black suit as well, but with a long copper colored blouse under it and a long black leather-coat on his shoulders. His hair in perfect waves. “Isn’t that right, Jongho?”
“Yes.” sounds a nervous Jongho behind him, slowly stepping out as well, his hands gripping the hem of his black jacket.
All in black, are they all attending? “’Die Zauberflöte’.” you recon.
“You know it?”
“A little bit. Occasionally Mozart slithered into my playlist.”
“Incredible artist, if you ignore that his sister was far more talented than him.” comments Seonghwa “She wrote most of it, as many other works of ‘his’.”
“Tale as old as time.” sighs Hongjoong.
“Insecure men pushing talented women aside.” adds Yunho.
“Nothing you guys would ever do, hm?” you tease at them and get surprised at their earnest and genuine eyes.
“The form of flesh should never influence the recognition of its talent.”
Seonghwa is right. His words should comfort. They sound like he quoted them. Or maybe that’s just him.
…
This. The air shouldn’t change as it is doing right now. You, shouldn’t feel a shiver running down your neck. You have known these men- vampires- since almost a year and this is the first time you question the words you said. The first time you can’t read them, the situation. Can’t guess what they are all thinking. You are thinking something but telling by their faces, they have something else in mind. Nothing threatening. No hunger for your blood, one could and should worry with them. But that makes you even more nervous. You don’t let them notice of course. Or at least, you try.
“You are quite talented too, you know?” Hongjoongs voice sounding unexpectedly soft. Encouraging.You chuckle, but it sounds more like an awkward exhale. “You know you are the only one to last a year in this job.”
“So, me, having no social life -apart from this, is a talent?” it’s an honest answer and an attempt to loosen up this weird tension in the air. As long as you don’t ask why the ones before didn’t last as long as you.
“Not just that.” Yunho smiles, also soft and comforting.
“Even with what we have been blessed and cursed-” Seonghwa steps closer “Vampires need to feel comfortable around someone as well. Especially those who protect them.”
“Right.” now you honestly chuckle “Because with the strength and speed and extraordinary senses of yours, you Do need protection.”
“Do you really think we would let anyone take this job?” Hongjoong sounds a bit offended. Your gaze on him again. His elbow propped on the back of the couch, with his face in hand. “We know your profile.”
“My profile?” you ask and he fixates you with his eyes “Wasn’t much in it.” you think out loud.
“It’s interesting what Y/N left out.”
All their eyes snap onto Hongjoong. They did not expect him to drop this.
“I don’t know what could be missing.”
“You do know. While you also believe that is everything.” a smile grows on his lips. Sweet and yet, something behind it. “You are exceptional, truly, Y/N.”
“Hyung, do you think it’s-” Jongho tries but Hongjoong ignores him.
“With no nourishment, everything fades. We fade, if we don’t drink blood.” he halts, straightens up, slowly, before his hand tucks a strand behind your ear and tenderly cradles your jaw “And as f-”
“Hyung.” the voice is unmistakably.
All eyes rush to the open door. Yeosang. Now all dressed: Black pants, a white silk blouse and black sash around his waist. His face unreadable but fixed on Hongjoong, who still holds your face in place.
“Ah, time to leave it is.” after a few seconds too long, the eldest lets go of you and stands up. “We don’t want to be late, right?” he ignores Yeosang whose eyes follow every move of him; He pads Jonghos shoulder then calls the others “San! Mingi! Wooyoung!” they all appear within a second. “Let’s not forget the short night we have!” he trills and steps at Seonghwas side. The look they both share speak words no one hears, only them. Then, both their gazes drift to the others. Waiting.
Jongho leaves first. Disappearing with an almost urgent woosh of air. San and Wooyoung following right after. Mingi looks over to Yunho who just nods at him. Mingi leaves.
Hongjoong and Seonghwa. Yunho and Yeosang are the ones who are left. They share a look- Yeosangs eyes drift on you for a moment -face still unreadable, before he disappears; Hongjoong and Seonghwa following immediately after.
“Yunho what the hell was that?” You take that chance.
“Sorry,” he smiles awkwardly “Mingi’s waiting.” and then disappears too, leaving you alone with no answer.
“A- Are you fucking serious!” you stand up from the couch “HEY ASSHOLE! EXPLAIN!” you shout into the night as if he could hear you. But the moment you started yelling, he was already miles away.
With a gaping open mouth and tense jaw you flop down on the couch again, arms crossed tight- Heart racing in anger. Your thoughts a compilation of a variety of slurs and “What the fuck was this?”
Eventually, you spot the bloody cups on the table in front of you and remember your job again. “I’m gonna put salt and essential oil in your fucking blood-drinks,” you huff and puff, grabbing the cups, heading to the kitchen “Bastards….”
#1#
With continuation of slurs and ‘what the fuck’s in your mind, you collect the other cups from downstairs. Then you rinse them all and let them dry. You don’t fill them immediately. You will do that about an hour before the sun rises.
For now, you head to their big living room and push the power button of the big and very expensive Hi-Fi System. You are free to use everything in the house, as long as you leave as you found it. So why not blast the biggest bass through the house, and have a little drink?
Via Bluetooth you connect your phone with the Hifi and pick your playlist, before turning up the volume. Loud. Very loud. Perfect. And then grab the bottle you had stashed behind the package of traps for cloths moths, as you walk through the house with a nicely filled glass- Examining the interior as if it was your first time here. It helped you distract and sometimes you spotted something you hadn’t noticed before.
The house was modern. Very modern. Certainly more glass than you had expected. The interior as well, apart from personal belongings- Kept close over the passing of time, hoarded or found (pr purchased). There are several library sections in this house. One in the big living room, containing of a giant discography. Ranging from records, cassettes, to CD’s. There is a little library section too, but rather with more modern books. The older books are in a room at the gallery/library at the end of the other house on the first floor.
During the colder days, the gallery is your favorite room. It’s quite big too, but in contrast to the rest of the house being very modern, this room is like traveling at least 200 years back in time. The windows are designed differently- big heavy curtains framing the given a view to the garden. Apart from less scratchy and more comfy seating furniture, just as modern electrification, everything else stored and displayed in this room is- old. Very old.
Bookshelves in dark wood reaching under the ceiling, with barely any space left for more books. Dressers standing under paintings with several little nick-knacks- Porcelain figurines from different time periods. And of course, big paintings, hanging on the walls.
There are several paintings in this house. Just for the art itself -Hongjoong and Seonghwa are especially fond of them. While other paintings depict the immortal dead men. The portraits for them, to find in just that gallery.
There are days -rather nights, where you look at those portraits and imagine which stories lie behind them. Especially one holds your interest- But it also scares you, or rather he does; Maybe that is also a reason why you do not pay that much attention to Yeosang. Because of his portrait. You hold it up last to look at. Just like right now-: The music sounding from the living room, through the entire house- Your glass with your very drink in hand. Taking a sip here and there.
You start by hierarchy, with the shared portrait of Hongjoong and Seonghwa. Hongjoon, sits in a beautiful big arm chair -like throne, dressed as the king of all pirates. An armband on his right arm, a captains hat at his feet, including a black flag, with something white printed on that looks like a compass- like the one in the church window, in their sleeping quarters.
Behind him is Seonghwa, with a star shining bright and guiding over his head. He rests one hand on the back of the throne, the other on Hongjoongs right shoulder His lower body is partly hidden by it, but you catch the glimpse of something that looks like a tail with scales, disappearing in the shadows. He is dressed in a complimenting outfit to Hongjoongs- the collar of his shirt not up tight, but revealing his neck. You can see lines on his skin, looking like gills, if one wants to believe.
This is the first portrait of them. There is another one, which Seonghwa had shown you just a few weeks ago. It’s in their bedroom and it looks more intimate than this one. It’s a scenery of a ship at sea. The captain -Hongjoong, leaning over board with a wide cup, filled and dripping of what seems to be blood. A wave rises high along the boat. At it’s peak, a siren breaking through the water -Seonghwa, meeting Hongjoong at gaze and holding the cup as well- Blood dripping on his hands.
After he had shown you this painting, you noticed the scaled pale along with the gills on Seonghwas neck in the other portrait.
Interesting, that Seonghwa is depicted as a siren two times. Every time you look at that portrait you wonder if it has some reality to it. Then you shake your head about it. But then you remember, that your job is to meal-prep for vampires…
The next two portraits- You skip, since one of them includes Yeosangs- Therefore you turn on your heels and walk to the other wall, with those of San and Mingi. Beginning with San, who sits on a throne carved from stone, ice and snow. The robes of his attire black and white, the heavy fur draped over his broad shoulders, white, with obvious bear claws attached to them. At first it’s seems like a rather cold portrait. Frozen hems and even snowflakes to spot; But at the bottom of his throne grow and bloom several soft pink roses and one white daisy. You always smile when you spot them. There is a deep fonding softness and tenderness about them. It matches with San.
You continue with the next portrait. Mingi, standing in a pack of wolves. Seven, to be exact. Not all of them to see, but three pairs of eyes stare at you from the shadows. The others walk and sit around him. His hand rests on one of their heads. His robes are long and dark blue with gray embroderies. On top of them he wears a leather coat, gray, with fur of a wolf on hem, shoulders and hood. His gaze is subtle, but intense, the more you look at him. Strength, care and deep loyalty.
The next wall with the next set of portraits. Wooyoung, who almost disappears in the shadow because of his dark attire - robe and heavy fur coat, if the light in the room is dark. If you don’t pay attention to it, you also miss the black rose, tucked in at his chest. Unmissable are two things in his portrait. First, the laid off crown of thorns in his hand- drops of blood dripping from it. And lastly, the black panther, sleeping at his feet. At first the darkness of this portrait confused you. Then you saw the details- the sense of freedom, self-determination and live itself- along with devotion.
At the side of Wooyung, hangs Jonghos portrait. You feel a bit of unease when you get to his painting. Not because of him, or the shown picture -although that would be valid. Rather though, that after his portrait, you’ll look at the last two.
Jonghos portrait- if you just look at him, modest. His attire is formal and traditional. Sitting in an arm chair, one ankle resting on his knee, both hands flat on the arm-rest. A gold ribbon around his neck, falling to his chest, to his heart. But behind him, a giant black bear with wide open, hollering mouth- teeth barred and shining. His claws on the backrest of the chair.
A threatening picture at first. But there is softness within as well. Jonghos gaze is soft, but determined: Portection, radiating from him. And just like with San, at the bottom of his chair grow and bloom flowers. Several white daisies and one pink rose, just like in Sans portrait. You had seen those hints before, but still didn’t dare to ask them what they mean. They must be connected, but in which way? Your gut has the hunch of a relation between them. Family? Bloodline? Were they turned at roughly the same time? Or are they generations apart?
You would like to know, but you are scared to ask. You’ve never asked one of them how they had become a vampire. It’s a rather personal question. And if you would ask them, they would ask you about yourself too.
For a moment you halt. As always you debate to just skip the last two portraits. Or at least one. But somehow you can’t. It feels unappreciative. Ignorant.
You take good sip of your glass, almost emptying it, and walk over to the last remaining portrait wall.
Yunho. The soldier. His attire resembles one who fought and won many, fights. Small ones or great ones- wars. Several emblems stick to his uniform. He holds a sword in one hand, lowered but with a strong grip- ready to strike at any moment. In his other hand he holds up -presents, a heart. A human heart. His, to be noted, with the bloody spot at his chest. But despite, his face is not filled in suffering. His gaze is warm and determined. All those symbols alone show already who Yunho is. But the hound sitting loyally at his feet- Waiting for Yunhos command; Loyal till death.
The last portrait. The only incomplete. Once it was, but- None of them remembers how long it’s been since then. Or maybe they just don’t wanna tell you. You haven’t decided on that one.
The frame is smaller than from the others, because a good amount of the portrait was burned away. What is left, is Yeosang, sitting on a definitive throne of silver, gold, black and red. His attire truly matching to a young king or prince. A black cloak around his shoulders with golden twines stitched onto. A crown on his head, only partly to see, since so much burned away. On his left armrest sits a raven, which he- … Which, he pets. Usually.
You blink perplex and look at the painting again. You’ve seen it many times. Looked at it-; You know that this raven sits on the left armrest and that his hand gentle pets it. At least, so you believed. … … No. No, you Know that! I know what this portrait looks like!! So why is the raven suddenly sitting on the right arm rest, looking up- And why, is there suddenly a red gloved hand on Yeosangs left shoulder, and why was lift hand risen, and intertwined with another red gloved hand.
… This doesn’t make sense.
… Did I drink that much? You look at your glass. Just one glass and you know how much you filled in and you also know that you do not got that hammered from it to the point to question your perception of reality.
You keep staring at the portrait. Scan it from one corner to the next. Every little spot. There is no way, that Yeosangs portrait could have been replaced. The burnings make it quite even more unique than the others…
“Okay what the fuck-” you scoff and walk to the other portraits one by one again. Scanning each of them to any changes. But nope, they are all exactly how you remember.
Stepping back to the trouble-maker… Hoping it will look just like you remember again. … But- nope! Raven on the right armrest. One red gloved hand on Yeosangs shoulder and the other of apparently the same person who you cannot SEE because it’s all BURNED! Intertwined with his left hand…
One last time you check your glass again. The remaining last bit in it.
Something’s tripping here and it’s not you. You know it’s not you.
You hold your gaze on the portrait. On Yeosangs face, and empty the last bit of your glass- Scanning his face, piercing in those very accurately painted brown eyes that watch into a distance, but certainly not you.
“What is it with you? Why does Yeosang suddenly not seem alone in his portrait anymore?”
Your questions hover in the air, the room; They brush over your shoulders as you keep looking at his painted eyes- Blinking and turning his gaze at you. Directly, at you.
The glass in your hand falls and shatters on the wooden floor.
Your eyes wide open. Fixed on the painting, on Yeosangs face, which not only just blinked, which not only just turned eyes on you, but turns his face at you too.
Your heart- beats? Hammers? Stands still? You can’t tell, because all your focus is on that portrait. A very much dried and fixated paint, which should not move, or even the picture it shows!
But there it is- Yeosangs face, turned to you, his eyes on you, distinctive. Warm. Soft, even.
Your chest clenches, all air escaping your lungs, shoulders sinking, eyes blinking- Gone.
The portrait is like before again…
Yeosangs gaze into a further distance, not on you.
His hand still intertwined with that red gloved hand.
And once again you wonder if you are tripping. You know you’re not! But- what is it then?
#2#
Seoul is not that far away from the house, when you’re fast. The nightlife of the city is vast- ranging from opera and theater, to clubbing and places which would never be found by those who aren’t invited.
This night, Yeosang hadn’t come to decide where to spend it. He sits at one of his usual spots when his mind is wandering. This time, the roof of the church in Myeongdong, right above the entrance- Watching and listening to everything and nothing while debating how to spend his night.
He had thought of accompanying Hongjoong and Seonghwa, while watching Jongho perform the opera. He could join Wooyoung and San on their clubbing night. Could. But would not. Way too loud and way too crowded. Easy to find prey though; Let’s be honest here: No matter the perfectly mixed ‘slurpy’ they all get prepared and handed out by you at the beginning of every night- A vampire is still a vampire. It’s nature is to hunt. By luring, like Jongho does tonight- a whole room full of potential, handpicked by Hongjoong and Seonghwa. Or by charm, as San and Wooyoung do tonight, dancing in a club all frisky and carrying the most alluring smile. Or he could find Yunho and Mingi, who probably are at a different kind of club. One that looks all fancy and exclusive to those with blood running in their veins- poor or rich, whatever… For creatures like they are, like Yeosang, it is a comforting place. Humans only get invited or accompanied for one night.
“Like I said, he would be here.” a voice suddenly pulls Yeosang from his thoughts. He looks down to the plaza under him- two distinctive shapes standing there and looking up.
“’Having better things to do’, of course; More like sulking all night again.” adds Mingi, to what Yunho just said.
Yeosang doesn’t answer. Just sighs and rolls his eyes, before a woosh of air sounds, suddenly both join him in the shadows of the roof. “I thought you would be already somewhere else, dining tonight.”
“’Night just started.” grins Mingi.
“You’re hungry too.” no question of Yunho.
“Not much.”
“Not much for everyone but our housekeeper.” Mingi couldn’t hold that one back. “I don’t think anyone of us would refuse if she would offer.” Neither did he stop as Yeosang looked at him, composure with piercing coldness underneath- his eyes.
“Mingi-a” Yunho puts his hand on his friends shoulder “We wanted to invite Yeosang to come with us. Did you forget?”
“Yah-yah…” he waves off, before nodding at Yeosang “So what is it? You in? Or did you just dress up like that for her to see?”
The composed stare still rests on Yeosangs face. But there is a tiny hint of a smile at the corner of his lips “I.Y.F. it is, I assume?”
“As always.”
“Fine.” he stands up, flattens his trousers and sleeves of his silk blouse “But I’m not in the mood to charm anyone.”
“I’m not sharing tonight.” Mingi doesn’t hesitate. He is hungry. For blood and some fun.
“I’ll share with you.” nods Yunho, calm and unbothered.
“Let’s go then.” and with another woosh of air, firstly Mingi and then Yunho and Yeosang are gone.
#3#
“This is insane. I’m not insane…” you mumble on and on, loud and in your head, brush and shovel in hand, collecting the broken glass and hopefully all shards from the floor, right under the (damn) portrait of Yeosang.
You didn’t pick it up right away. You should have, that is your job. And usually you would have, but this time, you needed a moment. A few minutes, walking outside the terrace to get your mind somewhere else. To get that portrait out of your mind- Those blinking eyes, looking directly at you- No! No you would not go there again. Mentally. Physically, you had to tidy up that mess.
You check the floor with attentive eyes and careful movements. Only as you are certain you can’t find any more shards, you do what’s part of your job. You take a photo of the spot the glass splattered, as also one of the shovel with the glass bits, before sending those to photos to Employer.
<A glass broke, floor is cleaned and unscathed.<
Then, you make your way back into the kitchen and dispose the glass in the bin, before putting both away in a cupboard under the sink. After that, you wet some paper towels and walk back to the spot, to wipe the floor a bit more thoroughly. On the way there, your work-phone buzzes. A message from Employer:
>Replace it.
Left door in the pantry.
Key number is the same as for the front door.>
“Pantry (?)…” you mumble, mentally entering the pantry and scanning it for a door. There was only one door in it and it was from a floor to ceiling high wardrobe. And locked! “Do they mean that door...?”
You put the phone away for now and wipe over the floor. Just to be sure, if there are shards too small for you to spot. And there is one! At least one. And that damn nasty thing -wherever it is now, cut your finger, that slightly overlaps the edge of the paper towel.
“FFFFFFFFFFFFFF- Are you fucking shitting me?!” your head snapping up towards Yeosangs portrait “This is all your fault!”
The portrait doesn’t move. Doesn’t blink or anything. Slightly disappointing, you would never admit. Instead, you continue with everything: wipe the spot clean, carefully. Then, toss those paper towels before going to the pantry, ignoring the sting in your finger. It hurt, but there isn’t even a serious drop of blood.
In the pantry, you scan the wardrobe for a key panel, until finding it at the side in a lower corner. You haven’t noticed that one before. But as you enter the code, the door soundly unlocks and gaps open a little bit, for you easily to pull open aaand- “Hmpf…” No Narnia. But another and not so small room. Disappointing. First, then- normal with a certain amount of oddity, stored in shelves and on palettes.
Different cleaning supplies and instruments, still packed up and in an amount you’d find in a supermarket storage. All organized neatly. Someone’s keeping this place tidy, whoever it is. You don’t wanna wonder why, just like with the wardrobe, you realize: You don’t ask questions on things no one (them) explains to you on their own. Maybe that’s why you’re still on this job.
Along the cleaning supplies, you also spot some chlorine, for the pool, obviously. Pipe cleaner. Again, in an unusual amount for private home- But what’s stacked even more -on a whole palette, is bleach.
You crook your head to the side as if that would change what you’re looking it.
Odd, in a private home. Like the storage of a serial killer. But-! Reminding yourself again that you are in a home of not one but 8 vampires--- Should I be concerned or is this just like me having two bottles of all-purpose-cleaner at home? Which, is also to find in the pantry. 6 bottles, as you count. Also some more: Laundry detergent! A lot! That’s Seonghwas you notice. If he doesn’t wear any perfume, his clothes smell like this one. Then, on another shelf are several boxes with luxurious bed-sheets. All wrapped in packaging. Beside the shelf, some mattresses, also still rolled and wrapped up. Before then, your eyes spot what you came for: Several boxes with glasses, including the one model you broke earlier.
You grab one glass and take a last look of this pantry in the pantry, wonderingIs this weirder than the thing with the portrait tonight? for approximately 5 seconds, before you just turn around and leave; Postponing the thinking and rather continuing with your night.
#4#
I.Y.F.. In Your Fantasy, is a club for vampires. A place for them to lounge- But mostly to dine, discretely and safe. It’s managed by another vampire, providing, or rather offering this place and service to all who need it. For a price, of course. Capitalism is all over the world, even in the world of vampires and such.
“Well, well, well… Look who is back” the beautiful blond puts her phone away as the three enter through the double-doors that looks like a usual fancy double-door in a fancy high rise “And without my beloved Siren and their feisty Captain.”
“Sorry Pam, they are at an opera.” Yunho greets her first, a kiss left and right on her cheeks. French, like she is. “Jongho is having a night in the spotlight.”
“They should have invited me, it’s been too long since I heard him chirp.”
Pam is 150 years old, so she says. It’s rather 200 years, but the vanity of aging is something she will never take off. She just refuses. Doesn’t matter she is beautiful for eternity. Part of the reason she moved to Korea is the beauty-industry. Because of the face masks, facial-massages with fancy creams and steam… A fragment of humanity she still clings on.
Don’t ever mention that to her. That would taint her image.
She looks stunning as always. Not one strand of her beautiful long blond hair out of place. Her bright blue Jacky Kennedy costume and shiny pink lip-gloss deceiving how threatening she actually can be.
Pam is not part of the captains -Hongjoongs, circle, but they know another. Partnership on serious or not so serious occasions. Like tonight: not so serious. On serious occasions, her knowledge is very helpful. She knows every vampire in Seoul and the cities around. Registering every single one of them, and every being they accompany on her property.
“Long time no see, Pam!” Mingi hugs her, despite knowing she doesn’t like it. A displeased grumble escapes her, but she lets him be.
Then, her eyes target Yeosang. They greet each other. One kiss on the cheek. “Well, if it’s not our humble king, honoring us with his presence.”
“Well, well, if it’s not the club manager.”
“The manager of the most exclusive club in all of Korea.”she smiles, but who knows Pam, sees that crack in her ego
“Really? All of Korea?”
Yeosang is usually so wise to not hurt her cold feelings. And Pam should be wise enough to not let her fangs draw out and bare them at him with a smile.
“He’s older than you, Pam.” reminds Yunho. Calm. Conciliating.
“And you should know I don’t believe in this stupid shit.” still, she flicks her fangs back in “If you’re a dick you’re a dick.” her eyes on Yeosang “If you’re a cunt, you’re a cunt.”
Yeosangs face doesn’t flinch. Mingi presses his lips on another, trying not to burst in laughter. And Yunho, leans closer to Pam, his voice sounding so charming like temptation itself. “Who can we be for you then, tonight?”
“Wrong dame, gamin.” she smirks at him, before drawing along his jaw with one of her long fingernails.
“Then tell us the Auslese you have here tonight.” he smoothly draws his credit card from his jacket- presenting it between two fingers for her. A smile arrives on her face, taking the card and holds it at the scanner. That was more to her liking.
“Celebrities” she hands him the card back. “More of the nepotist and snowflake artistique type. Some models accompanying their way. You heard of that Gala in Gangnam?”
All three of them hum agreeing at the same time.
“Anyway-” she waves with her hand, telling them to step through the thick curtain to finally enter. “Don’t forget to patch up and charm before you leave.”
“You say that as if we’ve never been here.” groans Mingi.
“She’s only talking to you.” reminds Yeosang before stepping through the curtain.
“Oh come on-! That was one time that I forgot!” Mingi hurries after Yeosang, while Yunho calmly steps through the curtain, giving Pam an assuring wink before.
#5#
Glass replaced and standing in the cupboard with the others. Your finger, wrapped in a small band aid. You still feel a little sting, but even after observing thoroughly, you didn’t find a shard or something. Therefore, you continue with your night.
Music turned off. Another glass with something to drink. Water? Alcohol? Which sounds better to face what you are seeking.
What are you seeking? Well… You are back at the gallery, standing before that one portrait again. Closer, this time. Calmer. Collected. From different angles. Curiosity, all over you.
Nothing. Nothing happens.
Maybe you only can do it once? An absurd thought- But isn’t your whole job absurd? Your presence here?
You start anew. Looking at all he portraits, one by one- Really, looking at them. No rush or obvious pressure. Maybe just a little hope inside you, that they will blink and turn their eyes on you too, eventually. But they don’t. At least since you are looking at them. But the night is not over yet. You still have time.
#6#
Mingi was hungry. Yeosang and Yunho watch as he leaves with one of the guest into one of the rooms, specifically for vampires to still their hunger. Soundproof, of course. Secret recordings of every room, streamed straight to Pams phone? Very likely. All to safety, for the humans. They can’t just disappear. They need to be send out back into their lives, with everything that happened -that a vampire fed on them, vanished from their mind.
The mind. So easily manipulated. What it stores. Easily taken by time, endlessly running. Or the charm of a vampire.
“What do you think of them?” Yunho nods two humans in a chatter. They seem close with another. Friends, probably. One for each of them. Yunho makes sure Yeosang gets enough to feed on.
“’seem alright.” is everything Yeosang answers. His eyes on the humans but not paying attention to them.
“Hey-” Yunho softly places a hand on Yeosangs shoulder “You are more distant tonight than usually. What’s on your mind?”
“Nothing. I’m just not in the mood to prey.”
Yunhos eyebrows rise as skeptical, as he crooks his head at him. “Have you reached that point now, after all those hundreds of years?” his eyes narrow, pushing “Or would you rather feed on someone, who is not here?”
Yeosangs shoulders straighten. His mouth gaping open for a moment- considering not what to answer, but which answer is more truthful. “I- cannot fathom what I truthfully desire right now.”
“Not even blood?” Yunhos voice sounding more surprised first. But then Yeosang just shakes his head, and worry sounds “You still need to feed.” he stands up and nods in the direction of the two humans he had picked “Come, I’ll lead for you.”
Yeosang follows without any word. He mildy, holds conversation with the two humans, which Yunho is leading. Normal. Funny even. Vampires may feed on humans, but they still appreciate conversation.
In the meantime, Mingi has returned with the human he fed on. No bite-marks, at least none to spot by the eye for now. He is very relaxed and enjoys the company of the human in a booth. A lot of flirting from the humans side, but also Mingis. Their mind is not manipulated to talk with him like that. It’s genuine.
Genuineness, which is about to lack in the conversation Yeosang and Yunho are in. He gives Yeosang a look. He knows Yunho long enough to know what it means. They know each other long enough for Yeosang just to answer with a blink of his eyes.
“It’s incredible what all you two bring into your art. It’s fascinating.”
“Ah thank you!”
“If two high-class unis and studies of art and history wouldn’t do it, then I would throw myself in front of a bus or something.” the two humans laugh. Yunho laughs as well. Yeosang chuckles, lightly. He just wants this to be over.
“What about your recent works- I’m so curious!”
“It’s top secret, I told you.”
“Yeah, of course, but-” Yunho focuses his gaze on them- the vampires charm; luring them into it, his voice, his command “I bet you two can make an exception for us, right?”
“How?” asks one of the humans. Not hearing anything, but him. Not seeing anything, but Yunho.
“By going somewhere private. You two want to come with us.”
“Yes.” nods one of the humans “I want to come with you.”
“I want to come with you too.” nods the other one.
“Wonderful.”
Yunho breaks the eye-contact and leads ahead. The charm still on them. Behind him, follow the two humans and lastly Yeosang. Two rooms are already occupied, but Yunho wouldn’t have chosen them either way. They are too extravagant, with beds and such; They don’t need that tonight. A little room with a couch, and fake-burning fireplace is enough.
“Take seat.” Yunho says and the two humans follow as he says: taking seat on the couch, backs straight, eyes attentive, but nothing behind them, only his command.
Yeosang closes and locks the door, then steps next to Yunho, who continues with the vampires charm.
“Him and me, will not kill you. We will only drink from you, and then let you leave.”
He doesn’t need to say that. He can and will take away the memories they have of him and Yeosang feeding on them. But even as a monster of the night, also Yunho cannot take off this bit of humanity- Easing the mind. A mind, that is listening to everything he says and would do everything he wants, without question, without thought-; Everything.
The humans don’t nod or anything. But they heard it. Under Yunhos command, until he releases them. Later. But for now, he walks to one of them, placing one knee next to their thigh on the couch, grabbing their arm at their wrist -lifting it, his eyes on the veins shining through the skin, as if they are presenting themselves just for him.
“Thank you.” whispers Yunho, directly at the human.
His fangs draw out. He looks over to Yeosang one last time, before he latches onto the humans arm- his fangs cutting through their skin and opening their veins for him with one bite. Blood spilling, slowly into his mouth, then faster, as he sucks on it.
The human winced under Yunhos bite, but that’s it. Now it’s rather Yunho who is to hear. His hunger sounding in every gulp, in every contempt hum of his.
The other human still just sits there, not even paying attention to their friend who gets draw, sucked out of their blood.
This by far not the first time that Yeosang will feed aside Yunho. It isn’t the first time that someone else charmed his to be prey for him. It isn’t the first time that a human is in front of him, waiting, their mind empty of anything but a vampires command. And yet- he doesn’t feel like he is actually here.
If he could, he would just skip this night and go back into his casket, trying to fall asleep- Trying to get back to that dream he had last. At first he had mistaken it for reality- It all seemed so normal. He was standing in the gallery, looking at his portrait- But it was complete. And yet- his mind refused to show him everything that was once drawn onto canvas. A shadow, hiding what it truthfully looked like once. For a moment.
Then, it was in flames. On the wall, still hanging all neatly- But in flames.
As the night had arrived- As the others rose from their sleep, he was still in his casket. His body frozen from a dream that seemed real. A dream, that showed and yet denied him what once was, and he hated it. He hates it. It’s been so long, he can’t even remember what that portrait used to look like. A dark cloud of smoke in his memory.
“Yeosang—” Yunhos voice echoes, calls Yeosang back into reality. He looks over to him. Yunhos eyes big -warning, only a bit of blood at the corner of his lips; But as as he speaks- “Feed now.” his mouth, his teeth are entirely red- coated in blood.
Yeosangs shoulders sink, but he does as Yunho advises. “Lean back.” Yeosang commands, the other human and they do. He doesn’t take place on the couch too, but sits on the big armrest. He takes their arm as well- he can see the veins under their skin, can hear the blood calmly rushing; Can feel the eyes of the human on him. Not curious- no emotion behind it, only attentiveness to follow what he might command next.
Tonight really is more difficult than usual. Yeosang sighs and meets their gaze. Even with their blank mind- “Close your eyes.” it’s too much for him.
The human does as he commands, of course, and the tries again. His fangs draw out slowly, his eyes scanning the flow of their veins- bringing their arm closer to his mouth-;
It’s not disgusting. They actually have a really nice scent. A mix of several face-serums and expensive make-up. But it’s just not what he wants right now.
His fangs flick in. Stands up and places the humans arm on the armrest, before crouching down on the floor, before their feed. “Open your eyes, straighten up and look at me.” he commands, and the human does.
Yunho stops drinking. He is not done, yet. But his eyes -his attention, rest on Yeosang.
“You will fall asleep when I command you.” starts, charms, commands Yeosang “When you wake up again, you’ll have everything forgotten. You have never met any of us- neither me or the two men I entered with tonight. You spent the night with your friend in this club and had a wonderful time, but a bit much to drink. You will wake up feeling a bit nauseous and weak, but you will be fine shortly after.” he rises, his eyes not letting go of the human, feeling Yunhos gaze on him “Sleep now.” he commands and the human immediately falls asleep, sinking lump into the couch.
“Are you sure about this?” Yunhos voice rings with skepticism and worry.
“I’ll get something along the way.” assures Yeosang, walking over to the door “Something small.”
“Small... A Maltese or what?”
“I’ll get Mingi.” he chuckles, then unlocks the door “See you at home.”
Without waiting for another word from Yunho, he leaves, and as promised, Mingi joins Yunho on the feast.
#7#
But, no human that draws his attention along the way. Not even a Maltese! This night is depressing, and Yeosang is not in the mood to find something (bearable) to feed on tonight, just for the sake of it. Either way, it’s not like he would die, if he didn’t feed himself now. There had been worse times, than this one depressing night. Besides, they have a full stuck of blood at home. Surely, Y/N is responsible for keeping eye on this stock, but it won’t harm anyone, if she’ll mix him another cup or two.
Yeah… Yeah this sounds much more like something he’d do right now. Just- having some blood from stock and then-- Then, he will just lounge in his room… so he tells himself.
Arriving at the edge of the woods surrounding the house and garden- Even from afar, he can spot that the terrace empty. You are not there. It surprises him first, but then he remembers there are still 3 hours left of the night. You’re probably somewhere inside.
Within a small second, he stands on the terrace. Your book still on the couch, untouched for some time now. And, he catches a scent. A scent he believed earlier to have imagined. But now he knows it’s definitely there. It’s barely, therefore you’re definitely not seriously hurt, but the smell is still distinctive.
He follows the scent, slowly stepping through the house- He doesn’t want to startle or scare you by appearing out of nowhere. The scent leads him to the kitchen, the pantry and lastly, the gallery.
The door is open- He has spotted you already as he approaches, stopping at the door-frame and- observing you.
You seem a bit restless. Your eyes scanning the portrait with such earnestness. His portrait, Yeosangs. Stubborn, you stand before it. Staring it down, almost. Staring down the image of him, while the real Yeosang, is not standing far away from you.
You haven’t noticed him, even after several minutes. Several minutes of you, scanning, staring- Waiting?
At first he found it amusing and interesting to watch you. But the more time passed, the more your features turned from stubbornness, into frustration. He doesn’t know you much, but seeing you like this makes him genuinely sad and he feels like he is seeing something he is not supposed to. The moment he decides to leave as if he’d never been here, is the moment you unfreeze of your stubborn (and frustrated) stare down.
“Urgh! I give up…” you groan, tired “I guess I’m just insane-!” throwing your hands in the air, as if you could throw the frustration away; before they fall slack down again and hit against your thighs. “Argh-! Fuck!” you ache and hold your hand, observing a finger with a band aid on it.
“Did you hurt yourself?” Yeosang asks, out of reflex and ends up startling you instead.
Your scream echoes through the gallery, as you flinch together, before then seeing him, standing right in the door-frame “Fuck! Yeosang!” you curse and then realize you two are not on that kind of level with each other “You- You scared me…”
“I’m sorry,” he apologizes and within a moment, he stands right in front of you, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck “I didn’t mean to. Are you okay?”
“Yeah… Just-” Hold up--“How long have you been standing there?”
The situation he had actually intended to avoid, now coming true “Uff-- A- A while.”
“How long’s a while?”
“A few minutes. …”
“A few minutes…” you repeat, letting that sink in.How long did you watch me?Did you watch me? You must have.
“I’m sorry,” he apologizes, once more, but his voice deeper, genuinely sorry “I didn’t want to bother. I was just following that-” he halts and for a moment his gaze flicks at the band-aid on your finger “Scent of blood.”
Your chest tightens. It’s not like you don’t know about their extraordinary senses. But having a situation now, where you become very much aware of it- because of your own blood; “You- were able to smell this?”
“Yes.” his answer short. Honest.
“Oh.”
A moment of silence. Uncomfortable silence.
“H-How did you hurt yourself?”
Why does it sound like he’s genuinely concerned? “Oh I-”this damn portrait… “I cut myself on some broken glass. I- I wiped over the floor, to collect the tiniest of those shards and-” you scoff “It seems one of them managed to dig itself into my finger aaand- I can’t find it because it’s so small.”
Yeosang would like to ask how that glass broke, but since you’re not elaborating- He leaves it. For now. “Do you want me to take a look?” he hesitates for a moment “My eyes are a bit more better than those of a human.”
“Uuh-- W- Would you be okay with that? There came a bit- a bit bit of blood.”
“With the necklace you’re wearing, nothing can happen to you.” he reminds, assures.
Right. You remember. None of them can hurt me, even by accident. Nor can they charm me.
“Also, I got myself under control.” he adds, shrugging his shoulders calmly.
You scan his face- weigh your options: an annoyingly stinging finger or No annoyingly stinging finger. “Okay then.” you unwrap the band-aid and offer him your hand to hold and observe better.
“Just a warning,” his hands stopping mid-air before holding your hand in place “my hands are cold.”
But as his hands gently wrap around your wrist and hold your hand- “They are not that cold actually.”
Not? His eyebrows furrow at you. That’s weird. “Good for you then.” That’s oddly weird.
His eyes and touch are careful. “Oh, there-” he moves your finger in a slight different angle “I see it.”
“You do??”
“Hmhm. I’ll get something to get it out. Stay here.”
You were about to ask what he wants to bring, but- A woosh of air and gone he is for 1… 2… seconds back he is, right where he was before. “Let’s take a seat.” he gestures to the nearest couch in the gallery.
You take place, while he turns on the lamp that stands next to it on a small and very old looking table. Then, he sits down right next to you, your legs and shoulders almost touching. He smells good, you notice, now that he is this close.
Carefully, Yeosang holds your finger into the light, while trying to get a pull on this small shard, stuck in your skin. You watch him do it. But then he asks you “May I ask how that glass broke on which you cut yourself?” and your eyes switch on his focused features.
“I- got startled.”
“What startled you?”
“You.” now it is his eyes that look you, meeting yours “Your portrait blinked at me.”
“Did it?” his voice soft, a hint of a smile on his lips, continuing with his doing.
“So I believe at least.” you let go of your stare “I don’t know. I- I might have imagined it.”
“It wouldn’t surprise me if one of our portraits did that.”
“Sounds more like something from a fantasy book or movie.”
“Just because it sounds surreal for some, doesn’t make it less real. There are many of those things in this world. We just have to look with an honest and believing heart.”
“Like having a vampire in front of you, trying to remove some glass from your finger.” you joke.
He smiles, sweet and delighted “Yes, just like that.” and then manages to pull the tiny shard out of your skin.
You ache. Small and quietly, but you feel it. What a mean thing.
“Did I hurt you?” his eyes immediately watchful on you.
“No no- I just- I feel the difference now.”
“Ah-” he nods and holds the tweezers in the light “Here, that’s the gruesome fella.”
You lean closer, see the tiny tiny sparkling piece of glass “So small and yet so violent.”
He smiles again at your words, putting the shard on the band aid you’d worn before. “That it was.” then, he puts the tweezers aside, not letting go of your hand “Let’s check if he didn’t leave any friends.”
You agree nodding, and his eyes scan your finger from every angle carefully. Then, places his fingers at your finger like some big tweezers, checking- “You feel anything stinging?”
“Nope.” you note, and his fingers wander to the spot the shard had been at.
“Anything?” pressing, tweezing your skin.
“No, just your pr-” you halt as you see it. A drop of blood forming on your skin. So small. But definite.
Your heart sinks and your eyes rush on him- scanning his face. Beautiful. Frozen? Fascinated?
His lips slowly part. His nostrils widening and you hear him inhaling, sharp and deep, while his eyes do not let go.
You could pull away. His grip is not tight. But you don’t. Why don’t you? Is it because he is so beautiful? Because you find looking at him in this very moment even so fascinating? And even more, as you see his fangs, slowly growing out- Peaking sharp behind his lips.
The danger right there, and you don’t move- He, doesn’t move. Just stares at it. He doesn’t squeeze at your skin for more blood to form. Just- Looking at it. Smelling that scent in the air.
A long moment passes, until he wets his lips and in that moment realizes that his fangs had come out.
He blinks, perplex and lets go of your hand- Hiding his mouth behind his own hand. “I apologize. I didn’t mean to.”
Something inside your guts tightens and drops again. Disappointment? “It’s okay.” you assure. “You want it?” and offer.
“What-?”
“Do you want it?” Do you want to taste me?
His eyes. Grant orbits of brown. His voice, supposed to sound distraught but ending up- “That would be forceful, to ask of you.” hollow.
“Are you the one asking, or am I offering you so?” gentle, softly you are, you sound- “It’s okay. I don’t mind.” while your eyes- something faintly shining within them.
Yeosangs gaze holds yours. Scanning your face while trying to hold himself back to look at that drop of blood on your finger again. He holds your gaze. Holds it- until his eyes eventually fall on your finger again and his shoulders tensely sink. The debate with himself in his mind is obvious. You wait, give him the time. Until eventually, a small breath of air leaves his lips and a contempt smile arrives. The debate is over.
“If you grant me such a gift of yours, I want to do the same for you too.”
“H-ow that?”
“In a fair trade. One drop of yours, for one of mine.”
You slightly crook your head to the side. “Your blood?” he nods. “You guys can bleed?”
“Of course. It is necessary for-” he pauses for a second “our survival.”
“Can you nurture yourself on another vampires?”
“There is not much you know about us, do you?” he smiles, surprised about your very fast question. Then realizes, you feel the truth of that. “I apologize. I didn’t want to make you feel insulted.”
“You didn’t.” your answer immediate. Making up your mind “Okay then. A trade it will be.” and hold your finger in front of his face. Offering. And this time, he accepts it.
His hand wraps around your wrist and holds it in place. His face nears, and just as you think he’s about to taste it, his eyes look up to yours again “I value you for that.”
“It’s- just a small drop.” your voice hollow.
“And you give it to me.” his, gentle, but earnest.
Then, his eyes fall down again, and he does collect the drop of blood. His tongue catching it, then his lips wrapping around it, gently. And once more, something inside you drops. It tightly flutters. It’s warm and brings your thighs to press together.
Does Yeosang notice? If so, he doesn’t show it.
“Thank you, Y/N.” he says as leaning back and letting go of your wrist again. While you, are only able to nod. “Now it’s your turn.” he reminds and presses the downside of his thumb against one his fangs, until it draws blood. The sight surprises you still. Fascinating. Curious. Subconsciously licking your lips as you lean in closer, but “Not for you to taste.”
What? Why??
Why are you so disappointed?
Instead, takes your wounded finger and smears the blood on his thumb over your cut and- What? How? It vanishes. His blood, disappears in your cut. Making it disappear. Gone. Your cut is gone!
Yeosang watches you. He can’t read your mind, but your face, your eyes--; Confusion over confusion, curiosity, wonder- observing the spot that had been cut my a tiny shard- Nowhere to be found anymore.
“Am I supposed to know your blood can do that?” you whisper eventually. Your eyes looking up to him.
“Do I have to worry about you exploiting us now?” his head crooks to the side. Charming. Playful, almost.
“Uh- N- No…” you stutter and he smiles.
“Then take it as simple new found information about us.”
‘Simple’...
“Surreal and yet real.”
You nod, mouth gaping open but nothing escaping.
“I’ll leave you unbothered for the rest of the night, before the others arrive again.”
You nod, again, and he leaves you to it. Walking out of the gallery, not just disappearing with a movement of air.
You looked after him, until he was gone. Listened to his steps walking upstairs- hearing the shutting of the door to his room. Then, you get up too. You need some air, and get back on the terrace- take place on your favorite spot, book in hand, but not able to read one word.
In the meantime, Yeosang comes back to the gallery. You didn’t notice it.
He stands before his incomplete portait- scanning it. Noticing the difference. The raven on the wrong side of the armrest- The gloved hand on his shoulder. And the damage on the burned edges, fading and the canvas growing. For the human eye, impossible to catch right there. But for him.
Something inside his chest clenches, itches- heaves… His jaw tenses and he feels a wetness filling his eyes, running down his cheek.
Am I-? he catches the liquid with the back of his hand. Red. Blood.
He gasps, astound and looks up to his portrait once more. “Will we finally make use of a bigger frame?” Will I see you complete?
********
A/N: Thank your for reading I hope you liked this fic. 🩷 And yeeeeah I might have shoved some True Blood vibes down this fics throat. I couldn't resist. I miss Pam.
Fic premise: Old Friends to Strangers to Lovers // You and Yeosang were once very close friends, until you couldn't handle your feelings for him anymore. You took the opportunity to live abroad for several years. Now you are back in Seoul and bumped into ATEEZ, your old friends.
Warnings: +18! MDNI// ServiceDom Yeosang, avoidant attachment// This part is less spicy but rather flirty; I still wanted to keep it +18
Pic source: YT
A/N: This was sitting in my drafts since I uploaded the first part- halfly done, then I wrote more and then got stuck very very close to the end and on this sunday i just wanted to take a little look at it aaaaaaaand- and here we are. Part 2!
#1# for orientation
The following week both of you are quite busy and the following weekend you are up with meeting a friend and a colleague. But you manage to talk on the phone, sunday evening. The moment you heard his voice at your ear- It sounded more husky than usual, and almost too close.
The weekend after that, you two meet up tho. Just picking up some beverage to go and walking through the city. Eventually joining some of the pirates bowling. (Yeosangs score being insanely good, like damn he almost always hit all pins!). All platonic, of course. You don’t constantly keep reminding yourself that you’re at it to become friends again, absolutely not… No matter he said you have a beautiful face. No matter he put all these creams on your face. No matter him borrowing you his clothes. No matter you and him always sharing the food/takeout you ordered. No matter him always taking the seat next to you---; It’s platonic! You’ve done that with your friends! You’d do it with the other pirates too! Sharing your food with them and such! These are old thinking-patterns you just have to endure sit through, to get over them. But that’s okay! You’re just glad to see your old friends again.
Therefore-! It doesn’t bother you when you don’t hear anything of him the following week. You don’t text him or one of the other members; I’m not running after anyone, when they want to be a part of my life, they will show me and will show them! (Are you bitter?)
Eventually, the week passes and Yeosang texts you. Excusing for not responding, but he was sick, along with the others, rotatory. That they all first thought it was Monsieur C‘Rona, because it had hit each of them within hours. But it was just a cold. Coming as fast, as it went.
Back then you wouldn’t have said anything but: No problem, glad that you’re feeling good again. The latter part, you texted back. But the next time you are over at their apartment, playing video games with him and Yunho- You address it as Yunho uses the restroom.
“You know you can tell me when you’re sick. Id’ like to be there for you.”
“Ahh-” he inhales deeply, reaching for the back of his neck, but instead pressing his lips on another. “You have your own schedule, I didn’t want to bother you.”
“You are no bother.” you remind him. “I wouldn’t think of you as a bother, when I am sick.”
He chuckles with a disagreeing face “If I’d cook you some stew or soup when you are sick, it wouldn’t do any good. If not even make it worse and bringing you some- I don’t know- instant Ramen wouldn’t be what you need.”
Oh, so that is it what this is about. “Do you think I wouldn’t appreciate you trying?”
“What use is it, if it’s not what you need?”
‘What use is it’… “Not everything needs or can be solved instantly, Yeosang. Just someone being there for you- Knowing that, is enough.”
He thinks about it. Inhaling between his teeth. “Matter of fact though: a home cooked meal” he gestures to you, before gesturing to himself “Versus instant Ramen, doesn’t really hold up to-”
“I want your instant Ramen.” you interrupt and look at him, daring him to; “Okay?”
You both hear the toilet flushing from the bathroom and then the faucet running. Perfect timing Yunho!
“I’m sorry.”
“No excuse needed.”
Two weeks after ATEEZ played Pingpong with their cold, they invite you to an afternoon in a Go-carting hall, with following dinner (as mostly). It’s fun! Sometimes a bit terrifying considering the speed and how harsh you bump into each other, but overall you’re having a blast.
After some practicing rounds, you all race each other on the track. Finishing on pole-position are Yunho and Yeosang. Yes both of them. Too close to another to tell who’s first.
That afternoon and glorious moment needs to be documented for course! Several photos of you all get taken- Of the winners Yunho and Yeosang, before a group-photo gets taken, everyone still wearing their helmets.
After posterity documentation is secured, the helmets can finally come off. Everyone’s hair looks messy. Even Yeosangs. That black balaclava he’s wearing, not looking hot at all… Or as he pulls off the balaclava, his hair ruffled and messy- to then run both of his hands through it, flattening it in place again. It’s not fair to have a friend looking That good… And maybe you got a little lost in that view, that it takes you a minute to realize that almost everyone has their helmet and balaclava off by now.
You fumble fast to open the clasp, but the adrenaline from the race still keeps your hands sweaty and shaky- You can’t bring the clasp to open. “Urrgh!!” you grumble frustrated, head falling back, which the eldest ones notice.
“Mingi-” Hongjoong nudges him with his elbow.
“Go and help her.” nods Seonghwa at you.
Within a second the tall chick is in front of you “Y/N, you like the helmet that much?”
“Ha Ha…” you huff “My hands are too sweaty to open it...”
“Got that!” he reaches out to help, you keeping your head slightly leaned back, to make it easier for him. But he’s struggling too. “It seems stuck, what did you do with it?”
“I didn’t do anything!”
It takes a moment and some focus of Mingi, but eventually the clasp finally opens and he carefully pulls off the helmet, and you the balaclava. Although you don’t see it, you know how messy your hair looks now. “Okay big guy, how hot does my hair look?”
“Really hot. It just needs a little-” he reaches out and ruffles your hair even more out of place.
“Yah-!” you smack his hand away and he giggles. “Very helpful dude...” you huff and reach to fix your hair blindly. But someone else does it for you. Without a word, Yeosang is beside you, untangling your strands and putting everything back into place. His face neutral- unreadable. But from him glancing at Mingi for a moment; With Mingi awkwardly scared smiling and backing off with your helmet...;
Something flips in your tummy. Yeosangs warm brown eyes, scan every inch of your face. Narrowing as he spots something under your chin; Your breath hitches as his hand runs down the side of your neck. His thumb gently rising your chin.
“Was the helmet too tight?” his eyes not letting go, as his thumb carefully strokes over the spot the clasp had been pressed against.
“Wh-at?”
“There’s a pressure point-”voice soft, eyes rising to meet yours again. Caring. Scanning. “Does it hurt?” stroking over it again.
“N-No.” are you even breathing anymore?
“Everyone-!” Hongjoong calls out “We’re leaving for the restaurant! Now!”
“Ah, good, I’m starving. Do you already know what you’re gonna get?” his voice now so casual again, as if his hand wasn’t resting now on the small of your back- leading you forward; As if it hadn’t just rested on your neck...
“Uhh- I don’t know.”
“They got some chicken there that’s pretty good.”
“I-’ll think about it.”
Well, well, well… What was that? You keep wondering that the whole drive to the restaurant and even still while you’re there. You sit between Hongjoong and Wooyoung- the latter one complaining how he would have definitely won the race if you wouldn’t have crushed into him.
“You crushed into Me!” you remind him.
“I had the right of way!”
“It’s a race-track, there is no right of way, Woo!”
“But if we would be on the street-”
“Not even then!”
The usual scenery unfolds: eating, yapping- Wooyoung taking Seonghwas seat as he goes to the restroom. Then Hwa squeezes between you and Hongjoong and Yunho waves at you to come next to him. “Scooch up, Mom and Dad need to bicker.”
“Do you want house arrest?” warns Hongjoong for one second before they both laugh.
Eating and talking about the go-cart continues, until Yunho leans closer to you.
“Good to see you alive, I thought you died when Yeosang made his move on you.”
“’Move’??”
Yunho grins and grabs his own chin in the same way Yeosang hat touched your earlier.
“Shut the fuck up.” it blurts out of you. Your chest quivering again, just thinking of it- Pressing your thighs together.
“I got a photo, you wanna see?”
“Jeong Yun-ho.” you warn but he only laughs. “You do like pushing peoples buttons, do you?”
Oh. Oh, the smile that arrives on his lips. Devilish- His tongue pushing against the inside of his cheek, as he leans right to your ear. Whispering with a low voice “What do you think I’m doing right now?”
That-! … Your ears and face heat up.
The wrong one is making you flustered!
“That was a bit much, I’m sorry.” Yunho leans away, smiling, awkward and genuine. That’s him.
“It was…” That was too sexy to hear it from you.
“Sorry. That trick works on Woo really well.”
“Good to know you’re joking.”
“Don’t worry, I got you.” he assures sincere “Yeosang just needs his buttons pushed, or he’ll take too long to make another move on you.”
“He didn’t make a move on me.”
“He did in front of everyone at the track. Can’t remember the last time when I saw Mingi this scared.”
You press your thighs together again at that thought; Yeosangs hand on your neck- His eyes so attentively scanning you- asking you “Does it hurt?”
You shake your head.Platonic. Platonic! Platonic!!! You tell yourself. Inhaling deep and feeling Yunhos eyes still on you in this waiting, seeking way. Alright. Imma ask you...“So why do you keep pushing?”
“Like I said: I got you. He’s watching. He’s always watching.”
He’s not. Is he? “Is- he watching right now?” you raise a curious eyebrow at him.
“I’m sure he is, but let’s make sure.” Yunho puts on his most smuggest smile and turns his head, finding Yeosang at the other end of the table, staring at him with the same unreadable face he had while glancing at Mingi; He turns back at you, whispering in your ear “Oh he is maaad.” giggling.
Slightly shaking your head, pressing your lips on another you look at Yunho, wondering when he had become so calculating. “You really seem to enjoy that. Not very puppy-image of you.”
“Puppies know how to play.”
#1#
After dinner they drop you off at your apartment, before heading home as well. For Yunho and Yeosang the elevator ride is quiet, on the first look. But Yeosang radiates! He immediately disappears in his room as they enter. Yunho turns on their PlayStation and flops down on the couch- Giving it 10 minutes. After 5 Minutes Yeosang leaves his room, clothes changed and his gym bag in hand.
“I’m at the gym.” Yeosang sounding composed normal as he passes him.
“Alright. See you later.”
“Hmhm.” he hums and walks to the door.
“Yeosang-!”
Yeosang steps halt at the door and without seeing him, Yunho knows how tightly he is gripping that bag. “Hm-?”
“You know I appreciate Y/N, just as the rest of us, right?”
Four seconds of silence. “I know.”
“Though,” Yunho starts, sitting up and choosing his following words with care “I do not appreciate her in the way you do, or as she does you.”
Within a moment something shifts in the air. The radiation is gone.
Yunho hears how Yeosang drops the bag and walks back to him. The look on his face, a mix of relief, confusion and seeking to hear more.
“You two have a lot of pride, which none of you admits to have.” Yunho puts the controller aside “Nor will she ever admit it,” not evento herself, “but she did wait.”
Yeosangs shoulders drop. “You- talked with her?” Did she tell you?
“She didn’t tell me.”
But you know. “I see...”
If you’re honest you knew all this time. “Are you still scared?”
Yeosangs chest heaves. Breath held. “I never said I was.”
“You didn’t need to.” It’s obvious if one knows you.
Yeosang exhales deeply. Relief taking over. How could he have doubted Yunho? “I was then.” he grabs the back of his neck.“But not anymore.”
“I-” his voice so small now, looking to the ground. His heart, his guts clenching as he remembers how he’d pulled away from you back then; Seeing your smile fading over time and hurt settling in your eyes. He shakes his head- His jaw tensing.
He never wants to see you again like this. He never wants to make you feel like this because he knew-! He knew the whole time. It was a pure lie to himself, that he hadn’t figured it would be the last time to see you. He knew it! He was just too cowardly to admit it. Until now. Now, he can’t understand how could he have been so cruel? How could he have been so foolish? He had been scared. Yeah, and-?
“I want her.” Yeosangs voice sounding so fragile now. Lifting his gaze again to meet the one of his friend. “I want her, Yunho.”
Yunhos twitches as he sees the wet shimmer in Yeosangs eyes. Tears collecting and about to run down his cheeks. But he doesn’t move. He knows Yeosang doesn’t want that. “Make a move then.” he smiles sincere instead. His voice breaking at the last word. “A real one. Make her feel as wanted as you feel about her.”I know you want to.“There’s nothing to lose or fear. She’s waiting.”
The car ride feels surreal. At one point Yeosang suddenly realizes that he went to the car, drove out the underground parking and passed several crossings. How? He doesn’t remember any of that. His mind was and still is filled with what happened today. The go-carting. Mingi -probably by accident, and Yunho -not by accident, pushing his buttons and making him feel jealousy about you. And not to forget, that whole talk with Yunho earlier. The realization that the other members know him. They Know him! Of course they do, after all these years, and Yeosang knows that but- The full realization...
“I know I pushed a little harsh, I’m sorry.” had Yunho apologized.
“I know why you did it.” had eased Yeosang. Of course he had.
“It was a bit much on my end, still. She thought so too, just so you know.”
But it worked.
“She’s waiting.” Yeosang hears Yunhos words over and over in his mind. Keeps driving. Eventually arriving, parking- And then just sitting in the car.
“Okay I’m doing this.” he decided and pulls up his phone, pressing the call button on your number. You pick up on the second ring.
“Yeosang-!” Oh that sound of your voice… It warms his heart.
“Hi, long time not hearing from another.” he starts, hearing you giggle. You’re so cute. “I hope I didn’t wake you?”
“No no, I’m chilling before going to bed.”
“Ah, well then-” I can do this!“What do you think of today?”
“It was awesome! It’s always fun with you guys, I notice every time how much I missed it.”
“That’s good to hear.” he smiles soft, his heart warming even more, just as it beats nervously faster. Uhm-- “Would you like to join somewhere more fancy for a change?”
“How fancy are we talking?”
“Cloth napkins and wine brought to the table for tasting.”
“Oh, you guys up for something expensive, hm?”
“Not with the others.” he grabs the back of his neck. “With me. As in a date. Next Sunday, 6pm, I’ll pick you up.”
He doesn’t see it, but you’re doing a happy little dance right now. “Sounds good to me.” only hearing the biggest grin in your voice.
“Great.” he does a tiny little dance himself as well. “I’m looking forward to it.”
“Me too.”
“Have a good night then. Sleep well, Y/N.”
“You sleep well too, Yeosang. Goodnight.”
#2#
Fast forward to Sunday next week! It’s 5:40pm and you are in the middle of getting ready for a date, which you still couldn’t wrap your head around was gonna happen. Even now your brain was still stuck in a loop of: All platonic! No, HE SAID ‘DATE’!
To be honest, how you’re actually feeling about it is not clear to you. You are happy! But- do you love him? You like him a lot and appreciate him!
You loved him once. But it was different back then. You were different and he as well. Can you love him again? Do you want to love him again?
However, after Yeosang had asked you out, you decided to treat yourself with that dress you had your eyes on for a long time. It was also on Sale (finally!), so this was a definite sign from the universe to buy it. It arrived yesterday -just on time, and it looks So Good! Like the material feels good on your skin and hugs your figure in the most complimentary way! You don’t know how it does that, since on the hanger it looks normal, but you ain’t complaining about that.
This had been a busy day, but you had managed it all so far! Cleaned your whole place, did the last bit of laundry and packet your suitcase for tomorrow morning. Yes, in your calendar on tomorrow Monday was a big ‘SE’ written. A work-trip over the whole next week. The traveling alone will take up two days in total. When you will be finally back next Friday, it will be late in Seoul. Just thinking about it, your back hurts… But therefore even more, you want that date today. Just because you have a flight tomorrow morning, you would not let this stop you. You can sleep on the plane. It’s a long flight to Stockholm.
As you saw the big SE in the calendar right after hanging up the call where he had asked you out, you were close to throwing a childlike tantrum.
Next day you told him about the trip and of course he offered to reschedule, but you didn’t want to. Just wanted him to know, to which he said: “Then I will make sure you have a good evening, so that you can rest well on your flight.”
That said by him, your brain went somewhere spicy, which you immediately shook off. Partly embarrassed about your thoughts. Partly ‘do not want to jinx it’. Partly still hanging onto the platonic stuff, why-ever.
Just as you are done getting ready, your phone rings. “Hey, I’m outside, are you ready?”
“Hi, yeah! I’m coming down!”
Before leaving, you take a last quick look in the mirror. Nodding at your outfit. You are happy with your work: the beige dress looking elegant while it sits comfortable on your body. A black blazer over your shoulders. Matching shoes, bag and jewelry.
Yeosang is confident about the date. And yet, he can’t stop fumbling at his outfit here and there. Sitting in the car had become unbearable after calling you. He leans nervously rocks against the side of his dark-silver Mercedes CLA 180. His fit: lightly flared black trousers, black low cut leather boots with pointed toes, an ivory-beige button down (with the upper buttons open), to take the edge away, and a black jacket, which he has to take off now. It’s warmer than he thought it would be (he’s nervous). And he’s about to feel even warmer.
“Yeosang-ah!” he hears and his look turns to you, leaving the apartment building, waving with the sweetest, biggest smile- His own smile fading the closer you come. Becoming more and more struck of you with every step you take towards him. His heart hammering faster and faster.
“You look good!” you touch him at his arm. Resetting him without intent.
“H-i.” he blinks perplex.
“You okay? Do I look okay?”
“You are glowing.” he breathes. His hands reaching for your arms instinctively.
The warmth of his hands reaches you through the fabric of your jacket. He doesn’t notice how he holds you in place and just looks at you (lost already). You do notice tho. Notice that it’s not his usual ‘buffering’ and that’s what makes it so sweet and strucks you too.
You can’t remember when was the last time you looked so long and intently at his face. His high cheekbones, his stern and soft formed nose, his brown eyes- deep and warm; Something aching in your chest as you notice that the birthmark at his eye is hidden under make-up.
How stupid was I, actually? Wonders Yeosang over and over again in his mind. The moment he had opened the door and saw you for the first time after years, he knew that he would fall for you again. And if he didn’t fall for you again, it would be because he had never stopped to feel that way for you.
“Yeosang-” your voice faint in his head- Only your hand tucking a strand of his to the side, pulling him back into reality.
“Hm?”
“I said: shall we drive?” you smile, clearly aware he was somewhere else in his mind. But not as far, as one might think.
“Ah, sorry.” he let’s go of your arms and opens the passenger door- offering you his hand “Let’s go.” he smiles, and you giggle as you take his hand and take a seatOhh you are so sweet.
The restaurant is in Gangnam and as you arrive, you first don’t see much. The entrance leads to a relatively long hallway, with giant mirrors on each side, complimented by dim lights behind glass. Discrete design but you see that it cost a lot. At the end of comes a glass-door, which Yeosang holds open for you, where you then find an elevator. This elevator then brings you to one of the further upper floors. Another glass door, which Yeosang holds open as well, before you are greeted by the staff with a smile. The table you are brought to is right at the window-front, with a good view on the streets and other buildings; The sun lowering deeper and deeper.
You have been at a few fancy restaurants as well. In your job, you not only organize and plan certain uptight come-togethers, but attend them as well, depending on how many and who will be there. This restaurant, -you actually haven’t come to snoop out, would be suitable for a business lunch. Maybe also when the higher-ups from the headquarter will come and visit. They will like that view.
The menu -with no visible prices (of course), has three courses, with each course having 2-3 variations you can pick from. As you both made your decision, the waitress asks if you’d rather have a white or red-wine. She recommends a white wine, which you choose. With another waiter accompanying her, they bring two different bottles, letting you taste from each of them. They are both good! But from both of your faces -without saying a word, the latter one tastes better.
Decision is made, one bottle stays with you, while the waiters leave you again. You look after them. Seeing the both taking separate ways. Her, disappearing into the kitchen, while he enters another door, that leads to something catching your attention. Oh, a lounge and a bar. This place looks more and more better for a business dinner with following drinks. you think, not noticing Yeosang talking to you.
“Y/N-” only hearing him say your name, you realize you had drifted off. “Too much?”
“Hm? Sorry, what did you say?”
He halts for a moment, uncertain. Scanning your face “Is this here too much?”
Oh- “No I’m just-” you roll your eyes about yourself and sigh “I keep thinking of work and the trip next week- And that this restaurant would be a real good place for a business lunch.” Why the hell do I keep thinking of work while I am here with him?
“I wouldn’t want this to become a place you associate with work.” he says and halts, perplex by his direct honesty. But deciding that he stands with his words. And as he sees you are more curious now, he continues “I would-; I want this to be the place where we had our first real date.”
He has grown. Matured. You realize and smile before you tease.“First. Will there be another one?”
He knows your answer and yet he hesitates “If- you want to. I’d like to. Do you?”
“So far I’m impressed, Kang Yeosang and tending towards a Yes.” you smile sweet and wink at him. His eyes light up- so cute “Okay, I will not put this restaurant on my list for business lunches.”
“Pinky promise?” he offers you his pinky finger over the table. That is Yeosang from years ago.
“Pinky promise.” you hook yours with his and seal that promise. “But now that we were at it, with whom have you been here before?”
“With Hongjoong and some of the others occasionally, but he was always around, he likes this place.”
Of course it’s him. “From where does he know it?”
He presses his lips on another “… From a business lunch.”
You gently kick him under the table, while he uses the cloth-napkin as a shield to hide behind.
The first course is brought to the table and as calculated, you try from each others plate. Conversation on a minimum, as you are busy eating.
The second course arrives and- same procedure. Sharing is caring.
With the last few bites finishing, the sun grazes at the horizon. You don’t need to communicate about it, but just look outside, watching the sun slowly disappearing- the sky turning golden with a soft red.
It all feels so normal again. So- As if this wouldn’t be the first time. And- it isn’t the first sunset you watch together. But it is the first you watch both dressed up for another, on a date. And a fancy one as well. Not caring about the outside world. Only you two- being able to sit in silence and enjoying the moment together.
As the sun is gone, you still hold on to watching the sunset, that already passed. Waiting, until the sky turned dark and it’s undeniable that the night started. Undeniable now, that it will have to be at the airport in a few hours.
You don’t notice him saying your name, only as you feel a touch at your arm. He leaned slightly over the table. Leaning back as you are back in reality.
“A popsicle for your thoughts?” he crooks his head to the side.
“A popsicle?” you chuckle, more touched than usual. It’s just- this is such a Yeosang thing to say “Yeah.” he nods. “There is still dessert, but why not have a popsicle afterwards?”
You just look at him. It’s so sweet. He is so sweet. And yet, you feel your heart clutching, realizing this evening will be over soon. That you have to cut it short because of your worktrip.
You don’t have to say it out loud, Yeosang reads it from your face- And again he leans forward. Stretching out his arm over the table- offering you his hand to take. You do. His hand is warm. His grip gentle. Soft, in a comforting way.
It’s kind of surreal- it should feel like that, since it all feels so natural. Not just him still able to read your thoughts. But holding his hand. Even tho you had been so close to another a few years ago, you rarely had touched another. A hug to say goodbye- But nothing more. Nothing as close, as feeling the hand of the other. Examining. Watching the movement and touch of your hands as you feel the warmth and sooth.
“This is just the first date I’m taking you out.” he reminds you.
‘Date’. He said it again. You love how he says it. So confident. So natural but with a soft glimmer in his eyes. Anticipation.
You can’t help but smile and bring your other hand on the table, asking for his to hold as well. He doesn’t withhold, but takes your hand with the same gentleness.
You don’t look at him as you say it. You know how Yeosang is regarding certain closeness. And even though he offered you his hand first, you stay cautious. As if, if you’d ask for too much, he would pull away again.
Yeosang watches you. Scans your face in every detail as you avoid his gaze. He knows you don’t avoid him complete, since you watch both your hands gently holding and intertwining. But there is something on your mind. Are you regretting you agreed to the date-? No. No, your features are too soft and bright. Your hold onto his too enjoying. But what is it on your mind? Yeosang holds one hand a little firmer, with his thumb stroking the back of your hand.
“I didn’t expect, you could be romantic.” you admit under his touch; and his hands halt for a fragment of a second.
“Not?”
“No.” Especially not with me.You don’t say that thought aloud, but- the way you press your lips on another and quietly, subtly and yet sharply inhale, before swallowing tense;
“You don’t think I can be romantic?”
“Well-” you start but don’t continue, as you still avoid his gaze.
His eyes follow yours, to your holding hands. His chest tightens. Quivers, as he starts debating with himself, if this is the right moment. He takes a deep breath and holds firmer onto your hands. “I know I’m not the best in- reciprocating the- fondness, people have for me and show me.”
“You don’t have to reciprocate because someone does feel a certain way about you.” you assure, your thumbs soothing over the back of his hands. Gently. Caring. But still something restraining in your voice. No one would notice. But Yeosang does. Even after all this time, he still knows you.
“I know, but when I do-; When I appreciate someone on the same level or close to the same, I-”he withholds the sigh in his chest. Uneasy. Tired of the past. “I used to make the mistake to pull away, because I didn’t know how to show that. Or rather because I felt insecure to show how I actually felt.”
You look up at him and your eyes meet finally again. And it’s- It’s warm. But, you had always been the one to be more openly regarding showing that you like him. But now he realizes- Even though you are quite upfront and direct-; You need him to finish what’s on his mind later. You don’t word it. Maybe you don’t even fully realize it yourself, but he sees it: What Yeosang wants you to know, should be said a little bit later.
He squeezes your hand sweetly “How about dessert?”
Your shoulders sink relaxed “That sounds good.”
He looks over to the waiters and nods at them. During the sunset they had wanted to bring the dessert; But you were so engaged into the view, that he gave them a sign to wait until he will tell otherwise. He doesn’t tell you. He doesn’t find it necessary.
“Don’t think I forgot about the popsicles.” you say, as you have your desserts in front of you, the waiters gone.
Yeosang chuckles. “I could never forget about popsicles.”
#3#
Exquisitely fed, you both leave. He paid, of course. Doesn’t look at the price, just pays. Not gonna lie, this did impress you a bit. This wasn’t Yeosang from years ago. This was grown up Kang Yeosang. Not a mature ‘dude’, but a man. You had noticed stuff like that already. He now had the money to get a certain car- But he opened the door for you, offered you his hand to get in and out of the car with ease. He had pulled back the chair for you at the restaurant.
These moments play in your head again as you wait for the elevator. You look over at him, just for a moment -so you think. His side-profile sharp and soft. Hair sitting still in place all perfectly. He looks good. Beautiful. Handsome. Confident. And as he turns his head to meet your gaze- Brown eyes so inviting- so alluring.
He is sexy. You do find him sexy.
“Do I got something on my face?” he asks suddenly and you press your lips on another to not burst into laughter.
“Actually, yeah.” you reach out brush over a spot on his cheek. Gently. But repeatably, until you sigh frustrated and pull away “Ughh- I cant get it off.”
“What?” his eyes widen and reach for the spot you touched “What’s on my face-?”
“Sexiness, it’s everywhere.”
The elevator doors bings open. You step inside and as you realize he is not moving, you pull him inside at his arm. You press the button that brings you back to the entrance hallway, while Yeosang is still buffering -loading a reaction.
As ten seconds passed, you check on him. Scan his frozen face- Eyes fixed on you, as you reach out and tuck a strand of hair behind one of his burning red ears. He blinks perplex at your touch, before his features soften.
“Hi.” you say softly.
“Hhhi…” he sighs and just- just looks at you, with those soft, sweet, cute eyes.
“Now you got cuteness on your face.” Within a blink his face is drawn in indignation.
He immediately steps back. “I am not cute.” voice strict.
Ohohohhhh…! “You can be cute And sexy, you know.” you reply, calm. Maybe teasing.
“Please stay with ‘sexy’, noona.” he sighs and the elevator door bings open again, with the entrance hallway in front.
This time he steps outside and as he notices you are not moving, he pulls you out of the elevator by your arm. And this time, you don’t move. Even after the elevator doors close behind you and hear it driving on a different level.
“Noona...” you eventually say, slightly leaning back as you fixate him with your gaze. “Since when do you call me that?”
“Since you call me ‘cute’.” one brow of his raising for a second. Pushing. Teasing.
Okay. Let’s play this one then.
You both look at each other. Gazes fixed. Not moving. Not wincing. Not mad. Only- seeing who will give in first. You know who will give do. But you want to enjoy this moment as long as you can. Seeing Yeosang like this: staring you down with this gentle, yet determined gaze.
He is so good at this. So good, that you can’t withhold a smirk growing on your lips.
“Sexy.” your voice eventually sounds. Low. Earnest. His features turn softer again, with a certain spark in his eyes.
He moves closer; You catch the scent of his perfume again, just as the warmth of his body. He doesn’t say anything, neither do you- Nor does anyone of you break the eye-contact.
“Stay here, just like this.” he eventually says. No question, but you nod at it. He smiles and takes a few steps back, before pulling out his phone and holding it up.
You realize what he’s about to do and immediately intervene- “No!” reach for his phone.
He pulls the phone out of reach, “Why?” sounding offended.
“Why take a photo of me?” you wail.
“Why not? You look so beautiful.”
You stop in your movement as your heart twirls. Your mouth gaping open, He thinks I’m beautifulbefore eventually managing to say “B-But I’m camera shy. I’m not good with posing as you are,”Mr. Idol.
His eyes sparkle, smiling sweet before tilting his head like a puppy “And if we take one together?”
“I would have suggested you to move my limps like a mannequin for it to look good but-”
“Both then!” he decides and grabs your hand, pulling you into the better light, before then helping you with your posture. Flattening your shoulders a bit, placing his hand on your back for you to straighten more (his hands feel so warm...). Then, holding up a finger in front you, signaling you to follow it with your eyes.
You hear the camera clicking, and feel it in your entire body. Internally, you wince, but don’t move.
Yeosang moves the finger to another angle. *Click* And repeats this two more times.
“Okay now show me-” you reach for his phone again, the anxiety starting to boil in your chest;
“No.” he presses the phone to his chest. “We are not done yet. We will look at them together later.”
Unbelievable. And yet, you don’t persist, but only huff. “Then- let’s take the photo together. And please help me again, ‘cause I have no idea.”
He smiles as if that had been just what he was thinking, and pulls you a bit closer. Guiding your gaze the same as before, to then take place right next to you.
First, it’s a casual pose in front of the mirror, like you’re just documenting your outfits -both of you looking on the phone-display. But then, he guides your gaze again. Two fingers gently grasping your chin and tilting your head slightly. His touch so warm again- Your heart fluttering at this touch -so similar to the one at the go-cart track.
He also locks into pose. Your gaze slightly tired away- but just from the corner of your eye you know: He looks good. While you pray to look somewhat okay.
Then, comes the last pose.
“Like that, just-” his voice so soft, his fingers so softly grasping your chin again- first. But then his hand cradles your jaw and guides your gaze back onto him and- Ohh... His face is much closer than you thought it would be. “Just like that.” he whispers, his breath touching your lips, eyes resting on yours- your lips- You hear the camera *click*. His gaze rising to meet yours. *click*. His fingers under your chin *click*
You lose track of when the phone-camera actually clicks. When does he take a photo? When his fingers still cradle your jaw? When the hint of a smile arrives on his lips? Showing his teeth- A darkness in his eyes; Or is it when he lifts your chin, while his eyes don’t let go of you. His fingers running along your jaw once more- Your eyes closing under the touch… “Good job.” he eventually whispers in your ear. His voice so close and husky- The sound of it runs down your spine. Making you shiver -your legs weak, as you try to collect yourself (your sanity) together again.
#4#
The Han river is a pretty nice thing to focus on, while fully collecting yourself (your sanity) again. Each of you a Popsicle in hand (almost eaten), as you walk next to the river. The water looking so similar to the sky and rest of the city. Dark, with flickering reflections on the surface.
“I think this is the first Popsicle I have since I’m back.” and even my favorite flavor!
“Since when are you back actually?”
“Uh-”oh that was dumb to say Y/N, you notice yourself “A while.” and finish your Popsicle and nervously biting on the wooden stick.
Yeosang notes your answer with raising eyebrows. Not enough for him. “How long is a while?”
“You know- a- a y-ear.”
It takes a moment to realize he stopped in his step. As you do- you stop as well. Look back, but don’t join him.
“You’re back since a year?”
O-Oh…. That tone of his voice…. That look of his.
He isn’t mad. He is disappointed, which is way much worse.
“Y-es.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Why didn’t you??” your voice sounds harsher. Equally with and without intention.
“Fair…” he nods, a moment of silence passing. Then, he catches up to you with slow steps. Stopping before you. “I shouldn’t have let our conversations die. One doesn’t do that to the people who are close to them.”
“Well,” you take the Popsicle stick out of your mouth, subconsciously waving around with it as you continue “you had been distant before so- it didn’t really change much. You withdrew emotionally,” you point the stick with bite marks on him, “I did physically.” before pointing it on yourself and taking it in your mouth again. The split ending stinging on your tongue.
Yeosang is frozen. Mad about himself; Wanting to apologize for what an idiot he was. Choosing his words carefully as he scans your face; But as you notice his mouth opening to speak, you turn around and continue walking. You lead the way, with him quickly keeping up with you.
Your steps aren’t fast or loud or stiff. But the way you avoid having to look at him, hearing him speak; You are still mad. You are still hurt. You do not want to look at me. And yet- Every step of yours is so perfectly ‘normal’. As if this conversation never happened.You are pretending. He realizes. You always pretend nothing ever happened when something about yourself is uncomfortable to you. And given the situation that You are leading ahead- You are hiding something.
“I do not want to pretend this didn’t happen or that I didn’t hurt you with that.” Yeosang starts with careful chosen words. You do not want to hear an apology of his, therefore that is not the words he will say just now. If he would, you would run and he knows that.
“You don’t know if you hurt me.” your response calm on the outside but there is a hidden bitterness under it. He knows that tone of yours.
“If I were in your place, I’d be hurt; If my friend would just stop talking to me. Doing this push and pull of normality and withdraw...” for one step you halt. It’s such a small second, but Yeosang notices; The way your body stiffens for a slight moment, the way your shoulders and chest tenses- The way you bite on the Popsicle stick with force, while your your features have suddenly become much softer than before. Actually, genuinely soft, while still walking. Only slower now. Pensive. Waiting.
“I- used to do that, when I was scared.” he admits. “And I did it even though someone was close to me. Especially when they were. When you were the closest to me. It scared me.”
Now, you actually halt. Your body just stops walking.
“Does it still scare you?
“I got other fears. But some are still the same.”
“Such as-?”
“For the new ones: That you will hurt yourself while chewing on that Popsicle stick.”
You hate him so much. You hate him so much that you have to laugh. That this is funny and sweet and that it makes you take the stick out of your mouth.
You don’t look at him, but you know he is looking at you and that there is a genuine smile on his face that you are dying to see! But instead you press your lips another so hard, to not laugh, although you want to.
Your eyes don’t rise at him, but you turn a little more towards him. Listening carefully “And for the old fears?”
“That I will never see you again.”
You remember the moment you had arrived at your flat abroad. Two suitcases and a backpack with you. The door shut behind you and you started crying. The whole time had prepared to move away- the whole damn flight you had told yourself how happy you were that you were finally free of this torment! But the moment you arrived and realized you actually did run away from him- That’s when you felt all the hurt of believing he didn’t like you.
Now, you do raise your gaze and you want to be mad at him but- The restraint that you always find in his face is gone. His eyes so warm and yet scared. “I’m scared that we will live our lifes as if we never met.” he continues; smiles warm and broken and yet so earnest “As if we never laughed together; Shared our lunch or dinner- anything; … As if we never leaned on each others shoulder. As if you had never been my favorite person in the whole world. As if-” he stops. His chest heaving as he looks at you. As you wait-! Then, he doesn’t restraint but- The fear in his eyes disappears. He takes one deep inhale and his breathing calms. His eyes on you, but so very different, as he removes the space between you. So close you feel the heat of his body. Continuing with a voice so tender, so careful- “As if I had never wanted you so much as I did then,” his eyes dropping for a second before they lock with yours again- leaning in so close to you that his voice grazes over your lips “as I do now. Still and more- only you.” before leaning away enough to scan your face; For you, to scan his- Those genuine, warm eyes, looking at you so sweet. So deep. So longingly.
********
A/N: Yunho is the best. Also thank you for reading! 💖