"Don't listen to them. Don't you EVER listen to THEM."
Yuu’s raised voice is nothing out of the ordinary. Having it directed towards Mika is also nothing new. This time, however, there’s a maliciousness in it that exceeds anything Mika has ever witnessed before. At first, Mika can’t tell if it’s directed towards the situation or himself. He fears for the latter, so much so that, for a moment, he forgets how to breathe.
Yuu’s eyes are burning with a fury so intense it’s practically palpable, but at the same time there’s pain, so much pain behind the menacing glare he’s shooting the other Hyakuya. Mika wants nothing more than to take that away but instead, he’s the one inflicting it upon him.
Mika knows, however, that much of Yuu’s detestation is directed towards the vampires instead. He tries to tell himself that it isn’t for him but regardless, he knows he is one of them too. If Yuu loathes them this much, then what reason does he have to not feel the same way towards Mika? Sure, they are family, but while Yuu has not changed, Mika is now exactly what he wishes to protect Yuu from.
“You’re not one of them. No matter what happens you will NEVER be one of them.”
Mika wants to argue. He wants to remind Yuu that for four long years he has lived with them. He is more like them than he would ever like to be, both physically and mentally. His body reminds him every single day of his inhuman thirst and his own thoughts and actions mirror those of the vampires around him. It’s painful acknowledging that but it’s the truth. Though against his will, he has lived with them, long enough to adopt their mannerisms, long enough to lose almost everything that still connects him to humans.
If it wasn’t for Yuu the chances of him having relented to his thirst and given in to his desire for revenge towards humans and vampires alike, are very high. Yuu is the only remaining thing which grounds him and holds him together and yet, he knows nothing at all.
Do you really think it’s that simple, Yuu-chan?
I’ve had no choice but to listen to them for four years.
If I hadn’t, I would never have found you again.
And if he was to refuse all his orders now, as dearly as he would like to do so, it would only put Yuu at greater risk.
He can’t expect Yuu to understand that, though he desperately needs him to. Mika knows, however, that if he isn’t careful his mistakes could cost him everything. He cannot afford to take risks when there are this many chances of things going wrong. He needs to retreat and reformulate his plans, eliminating any chance that someone will be able to stop them getting away.
“If I stay now, they’ll find us, they’ll find you. And that isn’t a risk I’m willing to take.”
