seen from Germany
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Who wants to hear a fun story? I was at the beach, and like, this huge ass wave came at me... but like I survived. Oh, but the point of the story is I think I saw a shark. That made me pee in the ocean, and then I swam back to shore. However, I'm back on land.
I’ve listened to nothing but the Chicago soundtrack all week, and get greatly offended whenever I’m out in public and they’re not playing it. You’re telling me your grocery store is too good for Catherine Zeta Jones and Renee Zellweger singing about murdering men? I don’t think so.
What is writer's block for sculpting called? Sculptor’s block? Well, whatever it is I have it. Not even viewing Wes Craven’s filmography over the span of a week did anything to spark my inspiration. I try to make at least one short film a month, and here we are halfway through March, and I don’t even have a storyboard! Does anybody have any tips on how to spark inspiration? I can pay you in bad jokes and acting as your own personal Blockbuster.
@senorsteve: Big stack, throw it on 'em big fat titties
And I'm lookin' for some bitches I can take back with me
You guys, college sucks. It’s March Madness and I’ve watched exactly zero games. ZERO!! I’ve barely even had time to whine about it because the only people who seem to work at the candy store are either me or Thalia and my professors are clearly all conspiring against me!
Does anyone want to do my homework so I can live? I have access to discount candy in return. Or, if that’s not your thing, I can clean really fast. I know some of y’all are messy.
Well, now I’ve officially seen everything. On top of seven new planets being discovered, scientists have figured out that they can not only teach football to bees but that the bees will then teach other members of their hive football too and consequently there could be the Hivebowl in the future. Even bees are more athletically able and promising than I am.
Did you guys realize that there is such a thing as weed bouquets? I'd love that. Thanks.
Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Wal-Mart. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML
